The blog of The Harvard Crimson

Flyby’s Past Datamatch Experiences

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{shortcode-02ef60e70b4b5fe8aa115e92b870a0948caac457}After a week of anticipation and emails, the algorithm has spoken and your Datamatch results are out. But what’s next, you may be wondering? What’s this about free food, you say? (If there’s any way to catch a Harvard student’s attention, it’s always free food.) Whether it be your first time doing Datamatch or you just want to read about other people’s experiences, we’ve compiled a list of past Datamatch matches from our writers to help you figure out what to do with your top matches!

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Writer 1: I put my preferences to love and friendship, but ending up getting no love matches. The universe was really speaking to me at that moment. I went on a date with my top friendship match, not expecting much, but we’re now great friends and I love her. You might not meet the love of your life through Datamatch, but you can definitely meet someone you can drink *spicy juice* with on a Saturday night.

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Writer 2: My top match last year was a friendship match with someone I had met earlier on in the year through another mutual friend. As college students, we obviously decided to capitalize on this opportunity and we got to mathing: which free food deal was the most bang-for-buck? Ultimately, we decided to go to Playa Bowl, because who doesn’t love a delicious acai bowl that kind of tastes like ice cream? The serving ended up being way smaller than we had imagined, but it was still very cute. We talked while we ate and got to know each other a little better. Alas, not much came out of the friendship match, but free food is still always a win. #staywinning

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Writer 3: I matched with my roommate during Meet26. We’re in a suite of five and don’t talk much in general, so we both refused to mention it for three weeks before we finally acknowledged it. We grabbed Sunday Sundaes together after, though!

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Writer 4: My top match was someone I vaguely knew from freshman year but hadn’t really seen since. Didn’t get free food since we didn’t go on a date but my friends and I still regularly reference it for fun. There’s nothing like a good stalking session with all of your friends while figuring out what you know about each other’s matches.

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Writer 5: My friend got matched with someone she knew pretty well. Neither of them had any interest in going on the date, so she easily convinced him to let us use the free food voucher instead. It was a cute Galentine's moment, and our girls date is one of my favorite memories I’ve made. Ovaries before brovaries!

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Writer 6: I got nine friend matches and one love match, who had no picture, bio, or prompt responses, AND they lived in the Quad.

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And there you have it: real, lived experiences from your favorite student life writers. We hope that we provided some insight into what to expect for your Datamatch results, but at the same time, just have fun with it! It’s all fun and games, unless… ;)

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How To: Valentine’s Day for Long-Distance Couples

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{shortcode-de48ade2cc862c0847d90a14ac40d024f1f93e2e}The day is finally upon us: Valentine’s Day! There are so many ways to spend this day, whether it be with friends (check out our guide to Galentine’s), on your own (check out our guide to being single on Valentine’s), or with your boo. But for those of you in long distance relationships, worry not — you can still enjoy this day. Whether the distance is Quad-Mather or across a continent, here are some ideas for you to celebrate with your Valentine even if you aren’t physically together.

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Start the day off with texts!

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Most of the time, your morning alarm is the most dreaded sound in existence, reminding you to get up and go to class. Instead, brighten up the day by starting it off with a cute good morning text! It can be short and simple, or you can write a whole poem if you want to — do as your heart says, but we’re sure your partner will appreciate the heartfelt message first thing in the morning, giving them a smile to start the day.

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Send them gifts

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In this day and age of technology, you can pretty much send anything anywhere (which can be both a good thing and a bad thing, but we’ll focus on the good for now). Go classic with flowers and chocolates, or you can also send gifts that represent an inside joke to make it more meaningful and special. You can either use online ordering services (Bezos it up, I guess) or ask their roommates to be the special ~secret~ messenger on your behalf. Hey, I can’t speak for everyone here, but flowers are always a quick and easy way to bring a smile to any face.

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You asked them to be your Valentine…right?

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Yes, you still have to ask them to be your Valentine. Yes, even if you’re dating. No, it’s not implied. Yes, go call them right now and ask. You’re welcome.

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Call them!!

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While it can suck to not physically be next to each other, at least you can still stay connected through phone calls and video chats, talking into the wee hours of the night while you procrastinate on your work. The best thing about long distance is that the two of you are always talking, because honestly, that’s the only thing you can really do anyways. Start and end the day with a call so they can hear your voice. :)

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Write each other letters

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Be a little old-fashioned: pull out a pen and paper instead of your phone. Snail mail may be a little outdated, but there’s something about putting physical words on paper that just speaks differently. You can tell them you’re thinking about them, write things you may normally hesitate to say out loud (because you have a roommate in the room), and include little gifts such as photos or cute trinkets.

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Do a virtual date night

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Bring the date through the screen! Plan something the two of you can do together. It can be fancy or simple, anything as long as it’s a way to spend quality time together. You can watch a movie together, order food for each other for a virtual dinner date, or play a game together. Check out one of our past articles for Virtual Valentine’s Day date ideas!

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Send them a video/voice memo

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Phone calls and video calls are great, but consider also sending your partner something they can save and rewatch later! Instead of a good morning text, send them a good morning voice memo. Hearing your voice is another surefire way to have them start and end their day with a smile.

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Plan your next visit

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When doing long distance, it’s a huge plus to think ahead and plan when you’ll see each other next. You can plan a belated Valentine’s Day celebration and recreate the day together. But in general, get excited about seeing each other again! Hey, after all, Feb. 14 is just like any random day; you and your partner can celebrate your feelings for each other any day.

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We know you miss them, but distance is temporary, and some may even say it makes the heart grow fonder. No matter how you choose to spend the day, keep your boo in mind and think about the next time you’ll see them, which will be very very soon.

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Valentine’s Day for Dummies

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{shortcode-0804d9649bce6d5b6624a60e09dc95f91a4f2a76}PANIC MODE: Valentine’s Day is here and you have no idea what to do/where to take your boo. It’s on a Tuesday, and you have a pset due that night. Don’t worry, Harvard Square can be charming, and your hopeless-romantic, YA-romance-novel-obsessed, relationship veteran, Flyby staff writer is here. I’ve even broken it down by relationship status:

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For your crush:

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Okay, if you’re using Valentine’s Day as the first time to talk to your crush, keep it simple. Let’s have a daytime coffee date. We’re feeling the vibes and keeping it cute.

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Your recs are:

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- Bluestone Lane (potential for a snack/meal here too)

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- Blue Bottle (vibes, vibes)

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- Faro Café (new, trendy)

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For your situationship:

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You’ve been seeing — for a lack of better words — this person for a while and feelings are definitely there. My first piece of advice: DO NOT DO NOTHING. Even if you’re unofficial, talking, entangled, or whatever other placeholder Gen Z comes up with because we’re scared of commitment: you care about each other. So here are some ideas:

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- A text: A Valentine’s Day text does so much more than you think. Start the day off right. Let them know you’re thinking about them.

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IMPORTANT WARNING: DO NOT ONLY DO THIS

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This must be accompanied by one of the following:

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- Flowers: You literally can’t go wrong. Everyone loves them. There are two floral shops in the square: Brattle Square Florist and Petali. C’mon, they even sell them at CVS.

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- Ordering takeout: If you’re not ready to take them out, just Doordash something and watch a movie. Light an illegal, unsanctioned-by-me-or-Harvard candle. It’s cute and intimate.

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Now, if you’re ready to sit down to eat with them. Here are some cute places that won't run your pockets up.

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- Felipe’s (a little step up from 1 a.m. Jefe’s)

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- Nine Tastes (such good food)

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- Saloniki (cute, quick, and a nice place to selfie)

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For your BAE

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This is your person, your boo, your partner, boyfriend/girlfriend, future spouse or spouse. Yes. You might be feeling some anxieties around Valentine’s Day because there's a lotta pressure. Just breathe and book the reservation.

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If you want to wine and dine your bae, here’s some semi-fancy places in the Square:

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- Toscano (beautiful, dimly lit, potential “Lady and the Tramp” moment)

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- Alden and Harlow (good food, nice atmosphere)

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- Barcelona Wine Bar (closer to Porter so an excellent option for you Quadlings — think about all of the tapas you could share)

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(Hopefully, I don’t have to tell you to do the first two from the previous section, but this is an extensive guide: buy your partner flowers and tell them Happy Valentine’s Day.)

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That’s all I got, folks.

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Just keep in mind: it’s the thought that counts, and there’s always 50 percent off EVERYTHING the next day in case you need to right your wrongs. ;)

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How To: Guide to Galentine's Day

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{shortcode-08b2cd255ff2320b6031e5fe837090df84974c3c}Forget Valentine’s Day—Galentine’s is the real, notable, love-related ‘holiday’ in February. Flyby’s got you and your (single) besties covered this year, with ideas on how you all can spend the evening. From playing squash to hosting a cook-off and watching rom-coms all night, this year’s Galentine’s will be full of laughter and fun, and definitely no Valentine’s Day fomo (finger’s crossed on that last one).

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Treat yourselves to a ~fancy~ dinner

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Hop on the T and head to the North End for some overpriced yummy pasta and lots of cheesy garlic bread. Why not head over to one of the cute late-night bakeries for a tiramisu or cannoli for dessert? Spare no expense or calories tonight. Beware of the couples — the place may be crawling with them.

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Play squash

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Being single on Valentine’s day got you down? Flyby has the answer for you. Gather up all your besties and head to the nearest squash court (i.e. QRAC or Murr Center). Get all that pent-up, “No, no Valentine’s Day date plans this year” anger out. There’s nothing quite like thwacking a bouncy ball against four walls with a racket to soothe the soul and heart. Don’t know the rules of squash? Who cares? Make them up. Everything goes on Galentine’s Day.

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Put together your own ~fancy~ dinner

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It’s time to make use of your floor’s common kitchens. Head to Trader Joe’s or Star Market (for all you Quadlings) and grab some frozen dumplings, sushi, and anything else that speaks to you. It also goes without saying that you and your besties will need a couple of pints of Ben and Jerry’s to round off your culinary experience.

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Host a cook-off

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If you are feeling adventurous, you and your besties can each make/put together some sort of food dish that everyone has to try and judge. Don’t know how to cook? Even better. The dish can be as simple or as intricate as you want it to be — some pasta, DIY fondue, a bowl of Marshmallow Mateys, doctored up HUDS chili — let your creativity run free.

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Rom-com and drink the night away

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Grab every snack you can carry from CVS, a couple bottles of white wine soda from C’est Bon and find a TV screen. Tonight’s picks should be the cringiest, pretty predictable, not-super-overplayed, most fun rom-coms ever. These may include, “The Kissing Booth 2” (this is the one where Elle visits Noah at Harvard in some parallel universe), “My Big Fat Greek Wedding,” “Serendipity,” “10 Things I Hate About You” (ok, this one is pretty popular, but it’s great). Or, feel free to return to some of the classics. What matters most is that you and your besties laugh, cringe, cry, get wine drunk, and have a great night.

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Face Masks

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This one is pretty self-explanatory.

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Karaoke

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An actual-karaoke bar/establishment is not needed tonight — Galentine’s karaoke can happen from the comfort of your dorm room. Turn up your speaker and stack your Spotify queue with you and your friends’ favorite songs that you all know the words too. Why not come up with an interpretive dance routine? Dance and sing the night away — or until your Proctor comes and shuts you down. Whichever comes first.

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The most important thing about Galentine’s is that you and your best friends laugh a lot, practice some self-care (yes, squash and cook-offs can be considered self-care) and celebrate each other. Valentines will come and go, but your Galentines could very well be around forever.

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What Kind of Harvard Friend Are You?

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{shortcode-8c8b19d037f9e9faf71cc035e6c15de97f7d2b01}We know you’re a great friend. An amazing friend. An absolutely fantabulous friend. But, umm, exactly what kind of friend are you? Take this quiz, and we’ll let you know.

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Which HUDS dish would you trade your firstborn for?

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A) Anything with lentils

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B) Sunday Sundaes — they’re the only thing getting me through the week

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C) Red’s Best Catch — what wouldn’t I do to go back to simpler times?

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D) French Toast — at least I made it to breakfast

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E) None of them???

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How much sleep do you get per night?

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A) More than my roommate, apparently

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B) As many hours as Sleep 101 says I should

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C) Eight (minutes)

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D) What is sleep but a social construct?

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E) Do you mean “per morning?”

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You catch a tourist touching the foot. What do you do?

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A)Touch it with them

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B) Run away screaming

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C) Make sure it’s broadcast on national television

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D) Set the statue on fire

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E) Gather an audience, so you don’t have to witness it alone

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What’s your ideal class size?

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A) About 12 students, seminar-style

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B) Between 50 and 100 students

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C) Two students, I crave intimacy

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D) 300 students at least

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E) Between 20 and 50 students: I want to feel seen but I’d rather not be heard

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How do you respond to a friend falling out of touch?

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A) Bribe them

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B) Go to their office hours so they’re forced to talk to me

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C) Staring at my phone until I break it with the intensity of my gaze

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D) Hold their iPad hostage

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E) Fade into oblivion

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What is, in your opinion, your greatest weakness?

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A) Having weaknesses is overrated.

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B) My perfectionism and attention to detail (if my interviewer asks)

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C) Overloading myself! Yes, I have five articles to write, three psets, and a date on Valentine’s Day

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D) I can’t start my 10-page paper until 20 minutes before the deadline!

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E) My physical need for sleep

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What’s your favorite conversation topic?

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A) That one time I saw Dean Khurana in Berg

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B) Dean Khurana’s Insta

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C) My strat for getting on Dean Khurana’s Insta

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D) Dean Khurana’s playlist!!

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E) Conspiracy theory: Dean Khurana is Remy the Cat

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What’s your ideal night out?

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A) Breaking into the Dhall for off-brand cereal

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B) In bed…

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C) Watching movies with the roomies

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D) A themed party!!!

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E) Getting out of this CITY, am I right

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Your friend just called you on the phone screaming and crying. What’s up?

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A) HUDS food suddenly tastes good — “Am I dying?”

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B) Their professor didn’t grant them an extension

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C) “Johnny Boy chased me through Harvard Yard!”

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D)It’s 11:50 p.m. and they have 20 pages to write before midnight

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E) They saw a rat… again

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And, finally, what do you look for in a friend?

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A) Someone distracting enough that HUDS seems edible

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B) A pset partner at the math lounge

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C) Someone as crazy as my roommates on a Saturday night

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D) People have friends?

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E) A shoulder to cry on

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Results

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Mostly A’s: Dhall meal buddy

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90 percent of the time we spend together involves us inhaling food during the 20 minute slot of free time that lined up on our GCals, but we’re so glad to have you in our corner. You’re an amazing listener and someone who uplifts every one us with your ability to see the best in everything — even HUDS food.

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Mostly B’s: Pset buddy

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You’re super dependable and always ready to help someone in need/anguish/the very serious, soul-crushing pain caused by the very real sickness of being a (Harvard) student. An academic weapon with a heart of gold.

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Mostly C’s: Blockmate

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You’re someone who makes the people closest to you think, “If friends were flowers I’d pick you first.” You’re oh-so-nosey and a bit overinvested in our love lives, but also so, so loved, and if there’s anyone we want by our side during our everyday crises, it’s you.

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Mostly D’s: Sneaky link

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You won’t let yourself be loved, but, tough luck, we want to see more of you. We might need to invest three psets-worth of energy to find you, but every moment with you is one to cherish.

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Mostly E’s: Remy’s Go-To

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You’re Remy’s favorite, and we’re so jealous but know that it’s well deserved. You’re the perfect mix of comforting and unpredictable, and time with you is sure to be a blast.

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Keeping Your Faraway Friends Close

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{shortcode-9b56df0bd504b7b617a12968cb3b026693ebd4d8}Maybe your bestie lives 3,000 miles away in Cali. Maybe your sneaky link transferred to the Quad. Either way, the distance between you doesn’t have to tear your friendship apart. Here are some tips to help distance make the heart grow fonder.

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Live life on the edge: be spontaneous!

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If you and your friend haven’t talked in a while, and you’re waiting for permission to text them, here it is. Go, text them, I’ll wait. At the end of the day, someone has to reach out first; why can’t it be you?

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If you and your friend text more often than you sleep: Break the mold, and text your friend just because you can! Message them when you see something random that reminds you of them, when you’re sad, when you’re hungry. The best time is any time you choose.

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Lean into the memes.

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You don’t even need words for this one. Why spend hours obsessing over the intricacies of “how r u” versus “how are you?” versus “what’s up?” when you could just shoot your faraway friend a lovingly chosen TikTok and call it a day? Funny videos are your completely free ticket to instant connection. After all, laughter’s the best medicine — why wouldn’t it mend the wounds of distance?

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Leverage the (mild) emotional blackmail.

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Send them an “I miss you” every once in a while. It may be a tad bit manipulative, but, hey, it’s the truth.

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Channel Jane Austen: live that period piece.

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In the whirlwind of 10-hour psets and 300-page readings, your schedules may not always line up. But staying in touch doesn’t have to get left on the wayside with some inspiration from days of yore. Write your friend a letter (by text) and let them take a day (or a week) to respond; your friendship isn't worth any less because it’s less immediate.

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Plan a vacay (or brunch).

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Spring break’s only a few weeks away, and summer’s just a few more weeks after that. Planning a hangout far in advance can itself be a vacation from stress, and it will give you and your friend something to look forward to until you see each other again.

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Pop the Harvard bubble: bring in the college talk.

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If your friend goes to another university, ask them about it! (The food’s probably better. They will be smug about it.) Academic angst is a universal experience, so make liberal use of it when you’re not sure what else to say.

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Move your fun to the big small screen.

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Covid-era schooling and socializing was a trial by fire, but at least now you have an arsenal of virtual entertainment. You can spend a night watching movies over FaceTime or Netflix Parties. Or, if you’re too intellectual for that, you can play online board games. Find those virtual niches to make the distance feel that much smaller.

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Put them in the GCal.

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Long-distance friendships are sometimes easier to maintain when they’re woven into your routine — and color-coded on your GCal — allowing your far-flung friend to stay as much a part of your life as your dhall meal buddies. Scheduled reminders to send a message your friend’s way can help you remember to stay in touch even during busy periods like midterm season (even if that’s every week) and finals week. With the help of a miracle or two, you and your bestie might also be able to align your schedules to talk (over the phone) for an afternoon in the near future.

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Remind them that you love them.

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It means a lot. I promise.

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The key to keeping your spirits up in a long-distance friendship is remembering that it’s okay to give your friend some space. Life gets busy, time grows short, and staying in touch may feel harder than it seems it should. And that’s okay. As long as you keep on picking up the phone, keep on making an effort to stay in touch, your friendship will remain intact and thriving.

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Flyby's Valentine's Day 2023 Playlist

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{shortcode-a1dc86519333c547090206787d7da56d3db980bd}

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This Valentine’s Day, whatever you’re in the mood for, we’ve got you covered. Whether it be chilling with friends (#galentine’s), figuring out how to ask out your crush, or planning a special date night, check out Flyby’s Valentine’s Day 2023 Playlist for the inspiration, vibes, and feels to set the mood.

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{shortcode-6d91cddd4f6a16182ca61a740cbfc9f1c1924312}

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Single and Gay on Valentine's Day

('

{shortcode-efdfa625517118bc94388541992d140a10329dfe}The whole thing about being gay is, you can’t really do it alone. I can say I’m a lesbian until the day I die, but as long as I’m single, I’m just a girl with a questionable haircut and a carabiner on my (left) belt loop. And no day adds insult to this injury quite like Valentine’s Day.

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First of all, who decided that Valentine’s Day merch would share half of its colors with the lesbian flag? Yes, we do own the color pink, thank you very much. Plus, teddy bears holding hearts are inherently sapphic. The masculine bear in a softer, plusher form, holding a classic feminine symbol of love? That’s a masc lesbian.

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Additionally, Valentine’s Day removes an advantage lesbians usually have over straight men. Normally, lesbians are much better at being romantic, because we have a better idea of what women enjoy and less toxic masculinity. But on Valentine’s Day, men remember that they’re supposed to bring chocolates to their Valentine, whereas if I do it, it just seems to her like any other Tuesday!

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Worst of all, on Valentine’s Day I have to look at straight people more than usual, because they’re all out and about. Ew. Remind me to stay in my dorm on the fateful day.

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I’ll stop now, because my dad reads these, and also because if the people on the other side of my internship applications find this by googling my name, I don’t want them to think I’m weird. People are obviously not obligated to date me. But that does not mean that I am not bitter. I am bitter. I’m just saying, I have a lot to offer. Yes, I may have some commitment issues. But clearly I don’t have commitment issues when it comes to THE BIT.

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And now, to connect this all to Harvard so that Hana and Tina will put my rant in the feature, which I acknowledge that they have no real reason to do, I will say that I will be doing Datamatch. If you can relate to this article, my DM’s are open, ladies.

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(To avoid the predatory lesbian stereotype, I will also say that this is all a joke. Don’t come for me!)

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What to Do If You’re Single on Valentine's Day

('

{shortcode-933208763d2786e09d4cc14c1eedc7d7ddb41f3b}If you’re single this Valentine’s Day, a) you’re not alone, and b) you don’t have to feel alone, because Flyby is here with some handy tips for single people to survive Valentine’s Day, also known as Singles Awareness Day (S.A.D.). There is no need to turn into the Grinch (Valentine’s Day Version) because love is all around, so here’s how to embrace self-love, friend love, family love, food love, pset love and so on.

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Treat Yourself!

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Valentine’s Day is supposed to be about treating that special someone in your life, and the person who you should love the most, the real BAE, is yourself. Self-love is the best love, so take this as your sign to spoil yourself. Retail therapy always works, so you might as well buy yourself that Keurig or those headphones that you have had your eye on. You know what else is perfect for filling your Valentine’s Day void? A decadent dessert. The Square has plenty of options, like Amorino Gelato, Mike’s Pastries, Milk Bar, and Zinneken’s (but beware of the couples). Look on the bright side: instead of spending money on someone else, you can splurge on yourself.

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Remember the good things about being single.

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Being single has its perks. You may be single on Valentine’s this year, but at least you’re not chasing a red flag. You have more time for your friends, family, and hobbies. You don’t have to share your food, ever. Your phone battery isn’t getting drained from calls and texts. You can watch whatever movie you want. You can literally do whatever you want with whoever you want. There’s no drama, no judgment, and no worries. You have so much freedom, so make the most out of being single now.

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On the other hand, you can also wallow.

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If trying to ignore the fact that you’re single, lonely, and sad doesn’t work, then embrace the misery. Hide away from heart decorations and lovey-dovey couples by staying in, ordering some unhealthy food, and watching something. All Netflix, no chill. Surprisingly, there are a lot of Valentine’s horror movies out there, like “My Bloody Valentine,” and romcoms like “How to Be Single” can be a great escape. Give yourself some time to feel your feelings because as soon as Feb. 15 comes around, the pity party is over, and you’re back to the reality of being a busy academic weapon.

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Do what YOU love!

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What’s a better day to practice the self-love first philosophy than the most loving day of the year? You get to be selfish on this day. You can dress to impress yourself. You can revisit some of the hobbies you love but never seem to have time for these days. You can hang out with your friends and throw a Galentine’s/Palentine’s party. Make it a happy day by ending it with some well-deserved me time. Put on your favorite pajamas and have a scrumptious meal in the comfort of your own dorm. Food will always be your Valentine. Food will never leave you.

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It’s normal to struggle with Valentine’s Day if you’re single. If you have been dreading Feb. 14 approaching, hopefully these tips can help you out. If all else fails, you can always use Taylor Swift’s “How You Get The Girl” as a last resort to win the affection of your class crush.

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Announcing Flyby's Valentine's Day Feature!

('

{shortcode-2ac4dfe70046daa043984be633139648fcd3d25d}It’s been a while, but Flyby is back with our first feature of the year! With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, we’re here to guide you through this holiday season, whether it be by yourself, a potential boo, or your closest friends. Make this day yours!

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Read our Will They, Won't They here!

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Read our Single & Vibing here!

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Read our Friends Till the End here!

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Read our Love is in the Air here!

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Love Languages: Harvard Edition

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{shortcode-384375c1c2771108dda7eaf59659b9ab14b4be85}As hard as it may be to believe, it is already February, and that means that it is the perfect time of year to express your love and admiration for those around you! The only thing is… since we’re at Harvard, we do things a little differently. Manifestations of the five love languages are present all around campus, and even if you don’t know it yet, you’ve definitely experienced them all.

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PHYSICAL TOUCH — Touching knees on the 9:25 am shuttle to the SEC

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Physical touch, out of all of the different love languages, is for sure the most bold. Come on, you’re literally IN CONTACT with someone — they’re going to know what's going on. Fret not! Harvard students have found a way around this issue through ~knee contact~. Hear me out. You’ve all been there in lecture, on the shuttle, or even in the dhall when someone else's knee just *happens* to brush against yours. And neither of you move. Yeah, that's what I’m talking about. Discreet but effective. Just a little reassurance that someone is there with you. Bonus points if you’re on the morning shuttle to the SEC, just because it's a little more spicy of an adventure.

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WORDS OF AFFIRMATION — Gradescope CA Comments

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We see some of you ramping up your workload with three (or even four!) pset classes this semester, and I have to tell you: I totally get it. Well, not in the sense of wanting to torture myself with that type of workload (even though I’m currently in three pset classes…), but for the extra sense of validation through Gradescope. CAs keep it real. They’ll tell you the good and be brutally honest about the bad. On my math midterm I got a comment that said, “This is not how fractions work,” and to be honest, I totally needed that. But when they tell you the good, it is so good. I feel so loved by the quirky little reassuring phrases left on a PDF during ungodly hours of the night. Seeing “ACADEMIC WEAPON” in the comments bar truly makes me feel warm inside.

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QUALITY TIME — Sitting in the Math Question Center (MQC) until ungodly hours of the night

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Look, being in any sort of office hours that start after the dhalls close is definitely less than ideal, do not get me wrong. But the thing is, trauma bonding is unmatched. You know that you’re going to be in that room until you’re kicked out, only to have to relocate to one of the 24-hour libraries, where you’re going to end up in conversation about how late it is and how you all should have started working earlier, just to end up further behind on the questions that you originally were looking to get help with. Not the best situation, but one that makes you feel heard, that you are not alone in your nightly struggle of making the 8:30 a.m. deadline. Grinding in general has the same effect, whether it be in a library, someone’s dorm, or even one of those remote tables on the side of the third and fourth floor of the Science Center (a personal fav, especially the one by the meat freezer). Kinda cute, idk.

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ACTS OF SERVICE — Saving a seat for someone in the crowded dhall or lecture hall (no seriously, why are they so crowded right now…)

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Honestly, meals are an extremely vulnerable time. The same is true with the moments right before a packed lecture. You’re tired, you’re hungry, you’re cold, and your social battery is running low. The fact of the matter is, you’re not at your best. The last thing you want to do is to actively search for people that you know and see if there is an open seat near them (knowing that there probably isn’t and you’re going to have to figure out an entirely new plan). If someone saves you a seat, you know that they truly care about you. Honestly, just marry them on the spot.

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GIFT GIVING – Sharing extra free merch from campus

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Let’s be real, everybody loves free stuff. There’s just something so wonderful about not having to pay for things (in a non-klepto way, obviously). Luckily for us on campus, there are many opportunities for free grabs, both in class and around campus. We see you with the “I Took CS50” shirts, the CEB sweatshirts, and now the “Let’s Talk LS1B Hats” (I actually don’t know if these are open to the general public yet, but I think I need one). Next time you come across free merch, grab extra for someone you care about. That’s true love — sharing the excitement of free goodies is an unmatched feeling. Extra points if the goodies are Harvard themed, because who would we be if we weren’t constantly advertising our school? Make that tuition do its work.

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There you have it, the five love languages as they are represented across campus in their silly little ways. Next time you see someone grabbing an extra Insomnia Cookie from a club fair, or putting their jacket on the chair next to them rather than their own, you’ll be able to recognize what is really going on. Harvard does it better, even at love (don’t fact check me on this).

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A Guide to Valentine's Day with Your Situationship

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{shortcode-00b3afb4c736d241a1609fa294b9d55bac57618a}Having trouble navigating Valentine’s Day in the modern dating world? Don’t know whether to send your class crush a Valentine’s Day Card Meme or a heart-shaped Jefe’s Gift Card? Consult Flyby’s flowchart!

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Dear Flyby, How Do You Get Them Out of Your Head?

('

{shortcode-30e598498def09cbe01b81c34525eb3ad2a41cc0}You asked — we answered. Okay no one really asked, except for my roommate and maybe me, asking myself. Do you find yourself sitting in the dhall for the entirety of the time it’s open for dinner so that you can authentically meet that one person you’re thinking of even right now? Perhaps it’s the person you really just want to call and blurt out that you’re in love with them…but that would be an issue considering you only met last week. Whatever the case may be, your roommates and the entire world want to talk to you without you glancing left and right to catch a glimpse of that special someone.

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DON’T: wait for them to come join you in the dhall.

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Don’t pretend to do homework in the dhall from the second it opens until they walk in, only to then ask them to grab that meal with you. You have better things to do than sit there and think about them while everyone else is getting the new HUDS grill specials.

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DO: travel all the way to the SEC — out of sight, out of mind this person.

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Unless they’re taking all of their classes in the SEC, it’s pretty safe to say that spending a day here means you have limited chances of running in with them. Avoid the Yard at all costs and any of the River houses. Maybe you’ll get the chance to think about something that isn’t them (like all the new Trader Joe’s snacks).

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DON’T: stalk them on social media.

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If you want to stop thinking about them, it definitely isn’t the best idea to find their last 10 exes or their mom’s coworker’s aunt’s neighbor’s address. It also would not be the most advisable to find out their star sign and start calculating how compatible the two of you may or may not be.

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DO: set up your Datamatch account.

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It may be time to meet new people. Whether friends or lovers, Datamatch can help you find the one for you — let the algorithm do its thing and find you the next person you may be reading advice for hanging out with for a super platonic walk around the Square.

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DON’T: call them… or text them… and definitely not at 2 a.m.

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The best trick I ever learned was changing their contact number to your own phone number. That’s right, go ahead and call them. It won’t lead to anyone but you. No more texting that ex at 2 a.m. or the potential person that you could kinda see yourself dating down the hall.

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DO: call your parents.

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You know what’s a great thing to do? Call home. Call your parents or your siblings. Let them ask you how you’re doing and maybe, you can even let them nag you. If you’re completely showered by love (or complaints), you hopefully won’t have the mental capacity to think about your crush/the one that got away/the situationship you need answers to.

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DON’T: watch that one clip of you two.

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Do not rewatch that one clip your friend took of you and them at that one party last week. They weren’t looking at you with puppy dog eyes, they were making sure you wouldn’t step on their new shoes as you tripped down the hall.

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DO: watch a rom com.

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Consider watching He’s Just Not That Into You, Valentine’s Day, or When Harry Met Sally. Pop some popcorn, call your roomies down to the common room, huddle around that one 13” laptop screen and immerse yourself in the movie completely.

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DON’T: apply to the research village just because they’re applying to it.

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The entire time you’re applying to PRIMO, SHARP, or [insert one of the many other research programs], you’ll be thinking about how nice it would be to grab a meal together by the river after a long day of doing…research? With that said, don’t apply to any of your internships based on the location you think they may be this summer. That will not get them out of your head.

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DO: your pset.

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If you’re crying about Chem 27, you can’t be thinking about them. At least, you really shouldn’t be. Go to office hours, re-watch the lecture, and call someone who can help you understand arrow pushing (no, not cupid arrows). You don’t need them — you need to submit this pset by 8:59 a.m.

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DO: get out of the situationship.

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The way to get out of the situationship is painfully simple. Have a conversation with them, talk about what they’re looking for and what you’re thinking about. On second thought…yeah…maybe don’t do this one.

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If you make sure to follow all of these Do’s and Don’ts, you’ll probably still be thinking about them surely get them out of your head. While it isn’t always easy to snap out of it, we promise there are better things to think about at 4 a.m. (and 4 p.m.) than what that person may be doing right now. For example, you could…you could…you could?

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Dating Apps? Nah, Datamatch

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{shortcode-aa8d016ece99a7edb6192c5a72c0355a93085f12}Are you feeling lonely? Are you looking for a new friend or something more *wink wink*? Well have no fear, Datamatch is here!

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Datamatch is a matchmaking app that was founded at Harvard in 1994 where students can opt to fill out a survey to find love or even maybe a ~friend~. Every year, the Algorithm manages to “match” 50,000 students, spread over 40 campuses, to someone they can hopefully tolerate. Also, you have a pretty good chance of matching with your crush, seeing that 80 percent of Harvard undergraduates participate in this opportunity to shoot their shot.

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We sat down with this year’s cupids, Chelsea E. Guo ’24 and Alex V. Cheng ’24 to get the inside scoop on the survey most Harvard students are guaranteed to fill out.

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The Breakdown:

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Maybe you’ve been living under a rock (or a pile of chocolate), but if you’re not really sure how Datamatch works, we’ve got you covered ;)

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CEG: What happens is on Feb. 7, which is coming up very soon, we send out this really funny survey that has a bunch of inside jokes and cultural references. People take it, they fill it out throughout the week, they play with our website, and then on Valentine’s Day, Feb. 14, they get a list of 10 algorithmically selected matches, and they get little coupons and they get to go on free dates with people in Harvard Square.

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AVC: For those people that are already cuffed, they also have a friendship option as well. So, if they want to just look for a Datamatch and get algorithmically matched for platonic friendship, that’s definitely an option for them to sign up as well.

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What You Need to Know:

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So maybe you’re thinking, ‘Huh, how can I take advantage of this wonderful opportunity to finally not be lonely anymore?’ Here are two features the Cupids recommend:

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CEG: One of them is Crush Roulette. So that’s the thing where if you put in two people’s emails — it could be your own email, or it could be your friend's email, and their crush too — you get a slightly higher chance of getting matched by the algorithm. So yeah, it’s super fun. Like, people have been making jokes about it. We always get asked, can you just hardcode my match for me — which we can’t, but that’s the closest option: to use Crush Roulette.

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CEG: The other thing is our block list. So sometimes people are like, “I don’t want to be with my toxic ex,” or “I’m so afraid I’m going to run into so-and-so,” you know, a sneaky link or whatever. So yeah, you can put in somebody’s email on the block list as well. And then we’ll make sure that you don't get matched with them — so, safety precaution.

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What You Have Been Waiting For:

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If you’ve been at Harvard and single for a while, you probably knew all that already, so here’s what you’ve actually clicked on this article for:

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HEK: Do you have any dating advice for the people?

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CEG: Alex is actually dating one of his Datamatch matches.

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AVC: I feel like Datamatch isn’t like a super serious thing, and that kind of helps with dating.

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AVC: At Harvard, people are always like, “Oh, dating takes up too much time. I don’t want to commit to one person because it just takes too much time and I don’t want to put that investment in.” But I feel like dating should be viewed as more of a fun thing. It's not necessarily some super serious thing. Like my current girlfriend, I matched with her and she was, I think she was like my last match. But I decided to reach out anyway. And we’d known each other beforehand. But yeah, just shoot your shot, like it doesn’t really matter. And like, no one really cares so you might as well just try — it never hurts to try.

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CEG: Yeah, I think that’s one of the most important takeaways. You never know what’s going to happen. So don’t be afraid to shoot your shot.

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AK: What does love mean to you?

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CEG: I have been very happy to have been surrounded by so much love in Datamatch, to be completely honest. As leads, Alex and I have been working really hard to try to make sure that our team dynamic and that our members and our leads really enjoy the work that they’re doing. And honestly, I’m feeling a lot of love in Datamatch. I feel like we all take care of each other very well. We work very hard together. I feel love in the not romantic sense, right, in a more platonic sense, or taking care of each other and really supporting each other with everything that we’re doing. That is a definition of love that I’ve been feeling a lot this year.

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AVC: Yeah, I think that's a pretty great definition.

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HEK: If you could describe your type with a Harvard house, which house would it be?

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CEG: Oh. Mine is gonna be a hot take. I love Currier and I love Currier dining hall. Everybody gives it so much hate because they say it looks old. But I think it looks very warm. It looks very inviting. I love the green. So I would say my type is totally Currier, specifically Currier dining hall.

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AVC: I think I'm gonna go with Adams because I'm in Adams and my girlfriend also got lotteried into Adams after we started dating. So I think I have to go with Adams, or else it would not be right.

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So that’s a wrap on our Datamatch coverage this year featuring the lovely Cupids. Be bold, make the first move, and stay safe out there. May the algorithm treat you well and the odds be ever in your favor.

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What Your Coffee Order Says About You

('

{shortcode-459dc35f7efbf5f537e7eb96ab6e29f3bf5f0e7a}You promised yourself you would save money this semester. But the constant self affirmations of “I am an academic weapon” and “they’re just busy, they’ll text me back later” weren’t enough. And here you are now, holding an overpriced cuppa Joe, wondering how it has only been two weeks. Read on to find out what your analgesic of choice says about you <3

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Humanities Student Tries a Big Lecture for the First Time

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{shortcode-beb0eda5c075a5faefeb59b6e92321924c388242} If you have ever met me, you know I am a rather archetypal English student. So much so, in fact, that I am in my fourth semester at this university, and the largest lecture I have ever attended was 80 students. Recently, it was brought to my attention that this is not the experience of a typical Harvard student. So, I decided to check out a big lecture just to see what I was missing.

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On Friday, Feb. 3, in the record-breaking cold, I trekked to the Science Center to attend Life Sciences 1B, a class that I understood to be full of hundreds of depressed premeds. I walked into Science Center B, where I encountered truly every freshman I know.

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Immediately, I was impressed with the production value — a GIF fire was roaring on the projector screen and some fun music was playing. The professor was dancing around in the front. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad. But then, I saw the lecture topic was gene editing.

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I sat down near the back so as to remain inconspicuous. Suddenly, I panicked: I haven’t done the reading! But the lecture was about to begin. Here are my thoughts throughout the lecture, in real time:

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1:31 p.m.

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“You could have gone to a different school.” — The professor. Yikes. I mean, true. Also, this is a truly crazy number of people all in one class.

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1:33 p.m.

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Why is everyone talking? Why is everyone on their phones? This does not happen in seminars. I’m scared.

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1:35 p.m.

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The professor keeps walking up into the aisles and it seems ominous. Is he going to cold call? I, again, am not actually in this class.

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1:40 p.m.

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Someone in my row is raising her hand. The professor either hasn’t seen her, or he did and didn’t call on her. She’s been raising her hand for several minutes. I feel bad for her.

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1:43 p.m.

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HE SAW HER! Why is he running away…. WHY IS HE THROWING A YELLOW CUBE AT HER?!

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1:44 p.m.

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Oh. It’s a microphone. And she caught it! Go her. I would never catch it. I would never ask a question in this class, because I’d be scared about not catching the cube.

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1:53 p.m.

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Apparently we are not messing with heritable genome editing, which I think means no eugenics. Good.

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1:54 p.m.

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“Maybe down the road, but not now,” was the final word on heritable gene editing. Uh oh.

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2:01 p.m.

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I’ve finally pinpointed what this experience is reminding me of. This lecture has Ted Talk energy.

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2:02 p.m.

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We’re talking about antibodies. Ooof. Wait — the professor just did a little voice pretending to be the coronavirus. I appreciate the theatrics. It did not get nearly enough of a laugh. To be fair, I didn’t laugh.

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2:04 p.m.

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The Wi-Fi in this room is so bad, because several hundred people are on their laptops and iPads and phones all at the same time. I’m just trying to load my little magazine to read because this class is so boring.

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2:06 p.m.

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The professor asked for an example of a palindrome and about a hundred people yelled “RACE CAR!” at him.

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2:10 p.m.

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He asked for a drum roll and nobody gave him one. :(

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2:16 p.m.

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Oh my god. He said there would be a question and everybody pulled out their phones. Does this question count for points? This seems kind of high stakes. A bunch of people are wearing white hats right now and walking around, asking people what they think the answer is. Cult vibes, for sure.

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2:18 p.m.

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It’s over. That was harrowing.

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2:27 p.m.

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“What’s the point of bringing back [d0d0s] if their habitat is gone? Probably good eating.” — The professor.

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2:30 p.m.

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It has taken an hour for the novelty to wear off. I’m ready to leave. I think the people behind me are also ready to leave. They’re passing TikToks back and forth.

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2:34 p.m.

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I just saw the craziest GCal of all time on the girl in front of me’s computer. There’s a whole day where I only see one tiny sliver of white space. It’s color-coded in extremely bright primary colors. I’m scared.

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2:35 p.m.

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Another question, but it’s an all-of-the-above situation. Even I know this one.

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2:41 p.m.

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Basically everybody is talking even though the lecture is still going. Am I going insane? I want this freedom! But also I think I’d die if everybody talked through all my classes.

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2:44 p.m.

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OMG he just mentioned a book! “Brave New World.” Maybe we all aren’t so different after all <3.

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2:45 p.m.

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Everybody just started to leave and then he told them to stay. Yeah. Maybe classes aren’t all so different.

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Well, I can only say that this has been an… enlightening experience. I’m happy I chose peace and don’t have to take giant classes like this. If you can’t avoid them, my heart goes out to you. Time to go back to the lovely Barker Center where the vibes are good and I get to discuss fun little books with my fifteen closest friends!

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