Frosh at the Union had their fill,
Then covered Harvard with puke.
Last week, thank God, the-cops caught their guy--
The book slasher, Stephen Womack.
Their cam'ras, mounted on the sly,
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Meant lots less sex in the stacks.
The year is done--what a year it's been--
We studied, we laughed and we cried.
We need a break for exhaustion
We've had it, yes, we are fried.
To our readers: thanks, we wish you well
We've enjoyed serving you this way.
If we've offended, please don't dwell;
Have a happy holiday!