('

{shortcode-94b0168017a91aad24d1d36cec739a3ecc36f6fb}

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It’s the start of September. The summer sun is shining, glistening off the deep blue of the Charles. Harvard’s Georgian brick beckons me as my mom drives our SUV to my new dorm. We pull into the Quad parking lot and I smile, excited for what the new school year will bring me.

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I grab my moving boxes and skip up my three flights of stairs to my six-person suite. I fling open the door and decide the layout’s not too bad. Certainly a little smaller than I expected, but the fire escape is an added bonus, and the window seats look like a rainy day’s dream aesthetic. But, unfortunately, it is not raining right now, and the suite feels a little too cozy. No longer am I smiling at the summer sun but cursing it for making my room feel like the inside of one of those solar pizza cookers. I hurriedly open the windows, only to find some obstructed by safety panels of plexiglass. While I try to supplement this snafu by turning on every fan in the suite, I trip over a large poster board. Looking down to face my assailant, I see a PAF poster with the words “DeWolfe” emblazoned across the front. DeWolfe? I ask myself.

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Now, I’m no expert on Harvard’s more obscure freshman dorms (I did once ask someone what school they went to after they said they lived in Lionel), but I could’ve sworn DeWolfe was overflow River housing — and nice overflow housing at that. I rush to Google to find out that no, DeWolfe was not supposed to be freshman housing, but here it is, providing freshmen with all the luxuries Harvard has to offer. Twenty lucky first years live in their suites, decked out with kitchens, bathtubs, and — oh my goodness — AC! And, just like that, I learn that first-years are living in better housing than I could ever dream of as a proud (but disgruntled) Cabotian.

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I sulk my way to sleep, tossing in my sweaty sheets, and awake with a maddening hunger and a busy schedule. So, I trek my way to the Cabot dining hall and am pleasantly surprised by the fried eggs awaiting me. After centuries (?) of student complaints, HUDS finally acquiesced to demands and gave us Quadlings some semblance of a hot breakfast. Perfect, I think. I’ll take this right back to my dorm and get on with my day. So, I meander to the swipe station to get my to-go box, only to find them nowhere to be seen. They’ve been abducted, gone like a thief in the night. Only that thief is an environmentally-conscious HUDS who cares more about their ESG rating than my ability to eat yucca fries in the basement of Lamont. So, pressed for time, I trudge across the quad lawn to go do my laundry.

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Yet, even this mundane task has been poisoned by new Harvard policies. After lugging my monstrously full hamper down three flights of stairs to the two washing machines in the building, I prepare to swipe my card only to be confronted by a warning sign stating “Crimson Cash is No Longer Usable.” Well, there went the $11.55 I had left on that app. Fine, I think. I can get yet another app for this school. And “One Tap Away” — or however many taps it takes to download Harvard’s new payment system from the App Store — I’m ready. But instead of convenience, I find myself confronted with highway robbery as my Apple Pay is charged a whopping TWO DOLLARS. Now, my eyes must be deceiving me. Harvard announced that it was raising laundry prices, but not to $2, to $1.75! Well, I can assure you that all four machines in the basement of Bertram Hall in Cabot cost $2. Since experiencing this initial shock, I have been unjustly charged twice more. I cannot fathom that a university to which my tuition costs nearly $90,000 each year and whose peer institutions (Dartmouth, Brown, Princeton…) offer free laundry, needs my EIGHT DOLLARS A WEEK to foot their water bills.

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I slide down to the floor of Bertram basement, aghast at what this university has come to.

', [ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-94b0168017a91aad24d1d36cec739a3ecc36f6fb}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/media.thecrimson.com/photos/2025/09/09/015455_1380108.png', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='large', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='five wash cycles of grief', hovertext=None, contributors=, ]>)])

('

{shortcode-9b3fde573fc41096e61d83072d054374d7864a9e}

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The first week of the semester is a trying time for everyone involved. It’s that special blend of optimism and chaos where you convince yourself that this will be the semester you have your life together — only to immediately prove yourself wrong in spectacular fashion. From professors who think assigning sections before you’ve even decided if you want to take their classes is reasonable, to exploding bathrooms, FWOC is basically a case study of how everything that could go wrong, will indeed go wrong.

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Despite the ups and downs, we’re all just doing our best out here. So grab your backup laptop charger (you’ll need it) and settle in for some of our flops from the FWOC.

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1. Finding a rotten banana at the bottom of your backpack

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Nothing quite says “I’m ready for a new semester” like reaching into your trusted backpack for a pen and instead discovering that what was once a banana has now reached a new state of matter in your bag. The smell hit our blogger first — and then the realization that their entire backpack was a biohazard.

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2. Having sections during the first week

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So many classes started having sections the first week of classes, after a single lecture — especially for courses we were merely shopping. For instance — enrolling in a Gen Ed after the second day of classes, only to find out that we already missed the first section.

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3. Living by Severance (managing the commute from the Quad to the River)

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The newest Quadlings have started to learn how to build their routines around commuting between the Quad and the River. The trek becomes a daily cardio workout, as they master the art of sprinting back and forth between their two homes.

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4. Showing up at the wrong building for section; getting caught up in a funeral procession

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The classic “I’m in the right place at the right time, but somehow everything is wrong” scenario. Our blogger arrived confidently and on time to their section, only to realize that they were in CGIS instead of Sever Hall. Then, in their sprint across campus, they were caught up in a funeral procession. Maybe section wasn’t worth going to anyway that day…

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5. Forgetting to bring everything to class for FDOC

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Our blogger had their outfit planned, did their skincare routine, and was ready to start the first day of classes strong. But when the day actually rolled around, they accidentally showed up with literally nothing (no pencil, no paper, no laptop), but good ~vibes~ and hope.

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6. Emailing a professor about enrolling in the wrong class

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A blogger was just trying to be proactive and responsible by confirming that they were enrolled in the class… but accidentally used the wrong class name in their email. We guess it’s a little too late to back out now.

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7. Everything in the bathroom is clogged

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Only hours after moving in, a blogger discovered that nothing in their bathroom was functional. Sink: clogged. Toilet: clogged. Shower: somehow also clogged. They’ve become intimately familiar with the work order system, hoping that PRESTO isn’t as backlogged as their toilet.

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8. Having to share a bathroom with sophomores

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The age-old question: how do people who’ve survived an entire year of college still not understand basic bathroom etiquette? Hair everywhere, mysterious substances in the sink, and ankle-deep puddles on the floor.

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9. Accidentally waving to strangers

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Nothing is more embarrassing than waving to someone you think you know, only to realize that they were waving to the person behind you.

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10. Spilling coffee on your computer…

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We’ve found that this is the best way to take these new tech-free policies seriously.

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Sometimes the best you can do is show up with nothing but vibes and hope for the best. Consider this your reminder that you are indeed not alone out there <3

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Welcome back, everyone — and may your second week be slightly less chaotic than your first.

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('

{shortcode-f793c285ce3afa924389f58047587b6a08bb2c17}

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What is Crimson Jam?

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Harvard’s beginning-of-the-year celebration to welcome you back on campus. Does this slightly make up for the fact that you had a Pset 0 due this week? Not completely, but it’s a good start!

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What should I wear?

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This is Harvard Yard, not Coachella. Do whatever you want. There’s no need to Care At All. Whatever you wear, it’ll be Classic and Perfect.

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Do I need to bring anything?

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Maybe a picnic blanket if you want to sit down. They’ll have WATER everywhere if needed.

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How early should I get there?

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Early enough to be there for the student bands, late enough that there’s already a good amount of people in the Yard. It’s a delicate social balance.

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Who is performing?

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Bryce Vine!!!

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Who is that?

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We will all learn together on Friday <3

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Why should I go?

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All the dhalls are closed, so you’ll have to trek to the Yard for dinner.

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And anyways, we’ll Miss You a Little if you don’t show up and Stay for a bit.

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In all honesty, it’s one of the few events in the year that almost everyone on campus attends — it’s fun to run into people you know but may not necessarily see all the time. Like your Ec 10a section buddy from freshman year, or that friend you made plans to get a meal with last semester, but never followed through with. Live in La La Land for one more day with us before the semester starts to pick up and it’s time to trek to Lamont.

', [ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-f793c285ce3afa924389f58047587b6a08bb2c17}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2025/09/05/043018_1380049.jpeg.1500x877_q95_crop-smart_upscale.jpg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='large', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='Crimson Jam FAQs.', hovertext=None, contributors=]>)])

('

{shortcode-47c434e5b14a71f284979e6b2b406d68f3fbd4e7}

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Dear freshly hatched future Flyby writers freshmen,

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Welcome to Harvard — where people form seven separate Google Calendars just to schedule their own emotional breakdowns, the turkeys have vendettas, and your confidence will go from “I got in!” to “Do I need a LinkedIn?” in about three days.

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But fear not! I, a fellow human who has survived (and even thrived through) the ritual sacrifice known as first semester, come bearing knowledge – not in scrolls or stone tablets, but in the form of 10 articles of superb investigative journalism that could save your life. Or at least save you from crying in the Holworthy Basement bathroom (again).

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To save you from a path of darkness, here are 10 essential Flyby articles that will make your life easier, your decisions slightly smarter, and your vibe significantly less panicked. Read them. Bookmark them. Maybe even pretend you found them on your own and impress your friends.

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1. Your Dictionary (If You Don’t Already Have These Words Down, You’re Screwed)

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Harvard has its own language. And if you don’t speak it, you’re going to get lost fast. This article will help you decode terms that all sound like BS but unfortunately are not. Read this before someone casually says they’re going to “the MAC after section then to Brain Break” and you pretend to understand.

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2. To Fuel Your Caffeine Addiction (if you don’t have one, you will)

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Harvard is powered by coffee and denial. This guide shows you where to get the former for free. The sooner you figure out how to secure caffeine without spending half your bank account, the better. Bonus: you'll look put together and cool holding an iced coffee in section, even if you’re crying inside.

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3. For your first real study sesh!

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Lamont: the place where time stops, your productivity dies, and someone is always coughing aggressively on the quiet floor. This article has everything you need for your first academic all-nighter: where to sit, how to snack, and how to make peace with your past decisions (like taking 5 classes “for fun”).

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4. How to Choose Which Clubs to Comp

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Picking clubs at Harvard is basically speed-dating with spreadsheets. Some are intense, some are chill, some will ask you to submit a résumé, and some your Social Security number. This article will help you figure out which ones are worth the effort and which ones might accidentally take over your life (literally).

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5. How to Not Stress About Lunch

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Lunch shouldn’t be a high-stress event, but somehow, it always is. This article breaks down how to get in, get food, and get out — especially when your next class starts in five minutes and you still need to pretend you’re not living off Annenberg Powerade and vibes.

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6. Harvard Traditions

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Think Harvard traditions are all about secret societies and the stacks? Think again. This senior reflection gets real about the actual “traditions” you’ll experience: panic-comping, finding your place, and navigating the weird mix of ambition and identity that defines your college years. Surprisingly heartfelt. Soon-to-be relatable.

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7. For the Homesick Freshies

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You may be tough, smart, and independent — but nothing hits like missing your bed, your dog, or a home-cooked meal. This piece is for the nights when you’re quietly losing it over FaceTime. Read it when you need a hug in article form.

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8. How to Reconnect with Nature

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Yes, this is real. Yes, we’re suggesting you go jump into a bush. This piece is a spiritual guide, and 100% proof that Harvard students still care about nature and not only the library. Go outside. Touch a leaf. Yeet yourself into the greenery.

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9. How to do your first away Harvard-Yale

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Harvard-Yale is like college spring break meets academic rivalry meets everyone pretending they care about football. This article will teach you how to survive the weekend, talk trash with class, and maybe (just maybe) make it to The Game.

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10. Take this now, then again in December

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The Flyby Purity Test: a time-honored tradition where you track your personal descent from wide-eyed freshman to slightly unhinged upperclassman. Take it now, then again at the end of the semester or year. If your score drops significantly, congrats — you’re doing college right.

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College is weird and Harvard is weirder, but you’ve got this. These 10 articles won’t solve everything, but they’ll help you avoid rookie mistakes, navigate the chaos, and maybe even enjoy yourself along the way. Read them, send them to your entryway GroupMe, bring them up when you comp Flyby this fall, or even quote them in the dhall like you wrote them yourself. I won’t tell.

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Welcome to Harvard. You’re gonna be fine.

', [ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-47c434e5b14a71f284979e6b2b406d68f3fbd4e7}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2025/09/04/003211_1379997.PNG.1500x877_q95_crop-smart_upscale.png', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='large', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='10 Flyby Articles to Read.', hovertext=None, contributors=]>)])

('

{shortcode-46acd3e70b5c9967fea765169d55a35a128b029a}

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About a month ago, the housing overlords handed down your fate in an email, complete with move-in times, a mailing address, and the names of your roommates. But somewhere between the packing tips and the photos of smiling students in Harvard Yard, that message holds the key to your future — or at least, how far you’ll have to lug your laundry every week. At Flyby, we’re here to help you read between the lines.

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Apley Court

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You’ll spend half of your summer reasoning with yourself that it’s not “that bad” you aren’t in the typical Yard dorm, and then you will spend the entirety of the school year reasoning with every person you meet that you live in the best dorm. Well, we can’t argue with marble bathtubs.

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Canaday Hall

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You’ll spend most of your time defending the dorm against rats. Even in the absence of the rodents, you will still have to deal with crowded doubles and carpets that belong in a doctor’s office (no, pre-med students, spending time in Canaday does not count as clinical service hours). You won’t admit that Canaday sucks, and we appreciate your valiant efforts to somehow redeem its honor.

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Grays Hall

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You have probably been deluded into believing that you live in the Harvard Hilton, but you don’t. The Harvard Hilton would have elevators, and preferably not shoebox bedrooms. You need to stay humble. This being said, your peers will forever be jealous of your massive common rooms.

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Greenough Hall

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You are way too humble. You have all the pros on the best Yard dorms without being too far. Big common rooms, beautiful windows, ensuites, and best of all—no tourist traffic. Be more proud.

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Hollis Hall

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Congratulations! As the calendar pages are turning toward final exams, you’ll get a close-up view of a certain… tradition. What tradition, exactly? Wait and see! If you and your roommate have somehow found a way to bond across the cavernous expanse of your giant double, maybe you guys can even watch the view together?

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Holworthy Hall

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You are incredibly in shape, as you have to find a way to carry your illegal microwave up about four flights of spiral staircase steps during move in, enough to compensate for the stone’s throw you are to Annenberg. You are also incredibly patient, as you are the only dorm destined to share a Jack-and-Jill style bathroom with another gaggle of suitemates you undoubtedly hate. You are a good person, Holworthy resident.

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Hurlbut Hall

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You probably pronounced this as hurl-butt when you first got this assignment, and you would be correct. Start getting used to that embarrassment now.

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Lionel Hall

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You are Straus’s sad little sister, and you’re probably deeply sad to say where you live because no one will know. It’s alright, little one.

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Massachusetts Hall

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You don’t exist. I’ll believe it once I see you in person!

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Matthews Hall

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Your back hurts because your bedroom is the size of a storage closet, or because you are leaning against the wall of Matthews’ front patio, trying to romanticize your life. Whatever gets you through the day.

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Mower Hall

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You probably pronounced this as ‘mower,’ like ‘lawnmower,’ when you first got your housing email. Save yourself the embarrassment of not doing that — it’s bad enough people don’t know who you are, so you can’t also not know who you are.

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Pennypacker Hall

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You were happy when you realized you got an en suite bathroom, then you were sad when you realized you were so far away from the Yard. But then you were happy that everyone you know also got Penny! And then you were sad again that there’s no elevator.

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Stoughton Hall

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Easy access to the most popular part of the Yard, and you have a laundry room. Cool? It’s not cool when you realize that you are sharing said laundry room, which in itself is tiny, with almost every single irrelevant dorm in Ivy Yard that you didn’t even know existed until its residents stole your dryer.

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Straus Hall

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Yeah, you’re excited because Zuckerberg lived in your dorm, and that is the first thing that’ll come out of your mouth as you exchange dorm assignments with your Annenberg buddies. You’re excited because you have a common room, and that will undoubtedly come next in your conversation about dorm assignments. But what won’t come, is that you are the exact same dorm as Lionel and Mower. Please stop bragging? I hope you know Zuckerberg doesn’t still currently live in your dorm? You do, silly.

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Thayer Hall

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You are cool. You don’t know what I mean by this yet, but you will soon. Congratulations, and have fun being the first to wake up on Housing Day.

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Weld Hall

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You are slightly less cool then Thayer, but you have that same sort of vibe. Except Thayer residents won’t have to fight their way into an elevator that is out of order more often than it’s in service. But it’s alright, you quite literally have everything else you could possibly need all in this dorm, so you’ll live.

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Wigglesworth Hall

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Your freshman experience will peak when during Convocation the entirety of Crimson Yard is asking to stand and “make some noise,” and your dorm alone sounds like a small army. Appreciate this moment, because this is where your community will peak. Hate this moment, because all of your amenities are underground, your rooms are tiny, and the Red Line keeps you up at night.

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I hope this gave you some much needed clarity on your living situation for the next year. At the end of the day, you must remember that no matter what dorm you are living in, you will have a great experience. But you must never forget that no matter how great of an experience you have, no one is having a better experience than you than some random guy living in Apley Court. But don’t worry, you’ll never forget! He won’t let you.

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('

{shortcode-372112ca4344273dae2c89894ccc12ecf67eb262}

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As an incoming first-year, you will have no shortage of ‘firsts’ at Harvard ( it’s almost like it’s in the name). To prepare you for this inevitability, we here at Flyby have decided to expedite some of that process and provide you with an ironclad list of some of the famous first words you are guaranteed to hear in your first few weeks — and, with any luck, will stop hearing soon.

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“I’m pre-med”

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Aren’t we all? Kidding — but it will definitely feel like our campus is aspiring to take over five whole floors of Massachusetts General Hospital until the first LS1a PIE (an examination known to kill the hopes of future doctors). If it isn’t pre-med, it’s pre-law, or pre-business, or pre-pretty much anything that sounds like it guarantees you a career.

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“Greenough isn’t that far.”

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It’s this or an aggrieved Pennypacker resident insisting that they’re at least an extra three minutes further from the Yard than everyone else. The union dorms — a.k.a. the freshman Quad — will be a source of some controversy until people find out about the actual Quad.

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“I’m double concentrating in... with a joint and secondary in….”

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This is not unlike the pre-professional conundrum, but no one is more confident that they can complete an extra concentration or two than a first-semester freshman. Academic ambition stops being all the rage around October, coincidentally right when midterm season begins..

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“Party in Holworthy Basement tonight”

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These are some first words you’ll wish were your last. Unfortunately, basement hopping for the first two weeks of school is a rite of passage that all Harvard students must undertake. My best advice? Have Flyby open to dull some of the pain while you’re sweating in the confines of your first college party.

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“I’m not getting Quadded”

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Saying “the Quad” to a first year is like cueing a black cat, dramatic music, and lightning all at once. Anti-Quad propaganda spreads early and it spreads fast, so while you’ll hear this mantra throughout the year, nothing hits the same as those first horror stories of the treacherous 15-minute walk to Cabot.

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These happy phrases will echo through Berg as you begin your days at Harvard, but remember not to take them too seriously. Life would look very different if we were all held to our first words on campus, so at most, these should give you some emergency conversation starters if you’re in a pinch. (Or, let’s be real, conversation enders.) Good luck, and remember that Flyby is here to guide you through all the canon events you’re sure to experience during your first year.

', [ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-372112ca4344273dae2c89894ccc12ecf67eb262}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2025/09/04/012926_1380009.PNG.1500x877_q95_crop-smart_upscale.png', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='large', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption=None, hovertext=None, contributors=]>)])

('

{shortcode-5199a775c563aa2341bbb96af1423ea3ba5b31bf}

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Dear Dean Deming,

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Don’t be scared. Being name-dropped in Flyby is a good thing, I promise. In fact, this probably certainly takes the cake when compared to your recent appointment as Harvard College Dean. Sorry! Speaking of, I should probably introduce myself before making any more lofty claims about you or your new role as a campus celebrity.

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I’m Ava, Flyby’s self-proclaimed expert on all things Danoff Dean: from mastering the perfect Harvard-Yale photos (which may or may not include kneeling on all fours next to two furry friends) to spotting a photo op miles away (#beenfeaturedontheKhuranagramfivetimesbutwhoiscounting). With the changing of the guard on the horizon (did I say congrats, by the way?), it’s finally time for me to ditch my Khurana mood board in favor of a new era of intellectually vital dhall run-ins and transformational Housing Day cameos (Kirkland HoCo is currently plotting their 2026 comeback, I’m sure).

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Now, I’m sure you’ve heard everything under the sun since being appointed in May. Curate a well-loved social media presence like Khurana. Take awkward selfies with students like Khurana. Become a meme-able staple at sporting events or dance performances like Khurana. However well-intentioned these pointers are, they often miss the mark, because — as any younger sibling can tell you — living in someone else’s shadow is unfulfilling and frankly boring. So, while I’m sure you already have a detailed game plan in place, I figured I’d take a stab at lending you a few suggestions that are actually fun and can help you become the most beloved person on Sidechat.

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Starting off strong, it will be key for you to find your niche early on. To that end, before you completely swear off having a social media presence like Khurana’s, may I suggest implementing a weekly “D(e)M-ing with David” Instagram story segment? Rather than following in the steps of taking selfies with students, you can put a punny twist on a classic Q&A session and have students respond with any questions, reflections, or photos from their week. This low-stakes option may very well have you becoming the only Harvard influencer people care about in no time.

\r\n\r\n

If you are really against using social media at all, don’t fret. Another great option would be to put your passions to use for all to bear witness to. And no, I don’t mean your interests in economics or political science; I’m talking about your prowess on the stage. As a singer. Start taking vocal warm ups more seriously, because you might need to belt Marvin Gaye’s “Let’s Get it On” again if you’re not opposed to hosting a talent show or karaoke night for students to bond with you. Just saying…

\r\n\r\n

Instead of continuing to throw more ideas at you, I’ll leave you with this. I have the utmost faith that you will end up finding your schtick and making students feel seen and valued. After all, with Kirkland House fiercely by your side, I know for a fact that you must have a stellar personality. So it’s hard to imagine that other students won’t come around to you soon.

\r\n\r\n

Congratulations, again, and keep Flyby updated on what you end up deciding to do!

\r\n\r\n

Sincerely,

\r\n\r\n

Your 16th Instagram Follower #og

\r\n\r\n

\r\n{shortcode-6f3f4c84c4e989e3d93a43e617989ddb21727e05}

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('

{shortcode-1c66aa3b89105af25910de1059806288e6bdc40b}

\r\n\r\n

So, it’s Aug. 26 and you’ve finally made it back to campus from the great outdoors — or maybe you’ve been here for a week putting on your first of many theater shows, serving the community, or learning how to register an American SIM card. Whether you’re navigating dorm logistics or deciphering HUDS menus, you’re learning to survive the lovely world we call the Harvard bubble.

\r\n\r\n

But let’s zoom out for a second. Because really, underneath these events, you’re also stepping into the real world – living alone for the first time, making choices that impact your daily survival (laundry or sleep?). In other words, welcome to your very own version of the Hunger Games. Who in the theoretical game is most likely to survive? Hear me out.

\r\n\r\n

1. FAP

\r\n\r\n

Fappers, oh, Fappers! You have to be some of the most impressive new students on this campus. Not only are your social skills keen from being able to interact with and share ideas with such a large, unfamiliar group of your peers, but you have ENERGY. Your rehearsals are long and unforgiving — a show does not just put itself on overnight! You would definitely make it to the center and grab the most materials for survival, and wouldn’t be afraid to create alliances or work into the wee hours of the night to ensure your success.

\r\n\r\n

2. FIP

\r\n\r\n

This one is almost a given. Our dear friends in FIP are not only navigating adulthood for the first time, they are navigating the entire United States for (often) the first time! Many of us lifelong ’Mericans don’t even know how to manage our own bank accounts or how taxes work – your survival knowledge and street smarts are unmatched. You have the upper hand from knowing people all across the world, so your alliances will likely run strong.

\r\n\r\n

3. FOP

\r\n\r\n

Alright. FOP definitely focuses on the hard skills of survival, like backpacking and surviving on simply tortillas for a week. But, you also get all of the soft skills of survival, like emotional processing, and how to make cheesecake in the woods! What places you at rank number three, you might ask? Overconfidence, and slightly worse hygiene than your peers. A week without a shower is not normal. Don’t keep that habit during the school year.

\r\n\r\n

4. LIFE

\r\n\r\n

Where this program finds its strong suits is its ability to wrangle leaders! You are trained in serving your peers, so you will definitely have no problem finding your way around the Hunger Games arena through and between alliances. I don’t think that there’s really any electricity in the ring, though. No PowerPoint access might pose a problem here – after all, you can only project your voice so far in the great outdoors.

\r\n\r\n

5. FYRE

\r\n\r\n

What I admire about this program is that among the others, it is truly focused around understanding what it means to transition into college! You have been best equipped with all of the skills necessary to succeed on campus. We just hope that all you’ve thought about is not school, though! There is much more to survival, as you will soon learn!

\r\n\r\n

6. FUP

\r\n\r\n

FUPpers. We know that your Pre-O has taught you to be well prepared to serve those around you, which is very admirable! You know how to follow directions, and have a genuine care for those around you. This might lead you astray in the games, as your empathy could be taken for weakness. The games are unforgiving!

\r\n\r\n

All jokes aside, no matter what pre-orientation program you’ve engaged with this year, you have the best challenge ahead of you: your first semester of college! Nobody is here to volunteer as tribute and take your place. So the games begin! As long as you can survive the HUDS fish, you’ll probably survive.

', [ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-1c66aa3b89105af25910de1059806288e6bdc40b}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2025/09/04/011609_1380004.PNG.1500x877_q95_crop-smart_upscale.png', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='large', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='Pre-Orientation Programs in the Ring.', hovertext=None, contributors=]>)])

('

{shortcode-7e1247cc29d30162187b34d117b0322e7706bebe}

\r\n\r\n

Picture this: I’m moving into Mather House sophomore year, just as excited as I was the year prior. Maybe more — because now I know what I’m doing!

\r\n\r\n

I know which days I should spend my Board Plus and which days I should head back to the dining hall, I know at least 20 of the gazillion esoteric acronyms people here use, and I know to trust any shuttle’s timing as far as I could throw it.

\r\n\r\n

As I struggle to lug the first of many densely packed suitcases up three flights of stairs that sweltering summer day, I hear a set of words I will never forget: “Are you a freshman?”

\r\n\r\n

The statement seemed absurd. I was very clearly moving into an upperclassman house. We both were!

\r\n\r\n

Not understanding her train of thought at all, I respond with a questioning “No?”

\r\n\r\n

Seeing the incomprehension in my face, she gestures vaguely to my neck.

\r\n\r\n

Ah, right. My lanyard.

\r\n\r\n

The lanyard everyone gets on the first day of freshman year.

\r\n\r\n

I manage a quick “oh, it’s just convenient” before continuing on my journey. As soon as she’s out of sight, I take it off and stick it in my pocket.

\r\n\r\n

So, my first piece of advice for not looking like a first-year?

\r\n\r\n

1. Ditch the lanyard

\r\n\r\n

If you’ve got your keys around your neck, people will know that you’re a new arrival (the horror!). Never mind that it’s genuinely convenient, making an essential item hard to forget, thereby ensuring that you don’t suffer the greater embarrassment of being locked out of your room. But at least it’s not just freshmen who find themselves dialing Securitas for a key at 2 a.m.

\r\n\r\n

Instead, put your key in that weird little pocket in the back of your phone case that’s also your wallet. Surely you won’t develop a constant, gnawing concern that it’ll fall out of its increasingly smooth container.

\r\n\r\n

At the very least, put your key on a more tasteful (and forgettable) keychain. No one will notice you patting your pockets like you’re trying to remember how to do the Macarena in the middle of a lecture. They will notice a lanyard.

\r\n\r\n

That being said, both the Swiss Army phone case and the keychain I mentioned should have something in common:

\r\n\r\n

2. No Harvard branding

\r\n\r\n

We go to a school in Boston. Well, a little outside of Boston. You get the picture.

\r\n\r\n

Wearing (or even owning) Harvard merch is often considered to be a tad… gauche. We don’t want to seem elitist, do we?

\r\n\r\n

That’s why you must avoid displaying anything that’s clearly Harvard-related on your person. In fact, try not to mention Harvard, even when it would be natural. People will think much better of you if you make a big deal out of being “humble” instead of just treating the topic like it’s a regular one.

\r\n\r\n

The advice above mostly applies to when you’re off campus.

\r\n\r\n

On campus, you have a far more important reason to avoid the branding — you might get mistaken for a tourist!

\r\n\r\n

3. Don’t ask for help

\r\n\r\n

Everyone wonders what the “holistic admissions process” actually selects for. Since you’ve joined the club, you finally get the truth: we can all smell weakness.

\r\n\r\n

To survive here, you have to do it all on your own. After all, it’s not like your various advisors, teachers, and miscellaneous mentors are here because they care about you and want to see you succeed. It’s not like our university’s greatest strength is its dedicated, passionate, and supportive community. And it’s certainly not as if every major contribution someone has made to society was done standing on the shoulders of giants!

\r\n\r\n

“It’s not impostor syndrome if I’m actually an impostor.” — a thought only you have had in the entire time the human species has existed.

\r\n\r\n

4. Enjoy yourself.

\r\n\r\n

The primary thing that distinguishes freshmen from upperclassmen is their collective preoccupation with being freshmen. And we get it—we really do! We were all freshmen once, as impossible as that may seem.

\r\n\r\n

We know what it’s like to worry about having already wasted the opportunities that Harvard offers before we’ve even been here for a month.

\r\n\r\n

We also have the privilege of hindsight and know how silly that kind of thinking is, and how hard it is to convince you otherwise. So I’ll leave you with a quote, a fridge-magnet standard often misattributed to Mark Twain:

\r\n\r\n

“Worry is like paying interest on a debt you don’t owe.”

\r\n\r\n

And frankly, as undergraduates, we all have real debt to worry about.

', [ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-7e1247cc29d30162187b34d117b0322e7706bebe}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2025/09/04/011003_1380002.PNG.1500x877_q95_crop-smart_upscale.png', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='large', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='Common first-year traps.', hovertext=None, contributors=]>)])

('

{shortcode-de0fb08e06b03d6427e16e32142e974497f64b9d}

\r\n\r\n

It’s the start of a new school year — and Harvard students had a lot to say. Thankfully, Flyby was there to eavesdrop on all the conversations you missed as you sprinted to lecture in Emerson. Here is our collection of our favorite quotes from Harvard students as they prepare for another semester of long Lamont nights, glum Science Center auditoriums, and ~transformative~ intellectual inquiry.

\r\n\r\n

“I accidentally tripped and fell into the petting zoo cage... It’s going to be a great semester.” — student in Mather House courtyard.

\r\n\r\n

“I like your boots!”

\r\n\r\n

“Yeah, they were made for walking.” - two girls by the John Harvard statue.

\r\n\r\n

“Oh they don’t take attendance? This is definitely the last time you’ll see me here.” - student in a lecture that they will never attend again.

\r\n\r\n

“I’m going to try the flybys today.”

\r\n\r\n

“The flybys?”

\r\n\r\n

“Yeah, the basement thing.” - freshmen by the Science Center.

\r\n\r\n

“How was your summer in Asia? You’re GLOWING.” - student who then proceeds to walk away before hearing the other girl’s response.

\r\n\r\n

“You need to be more high maintenance, like me.” - two guys, very mysterious.

\r\n\r\n

“I’ve only overheard screaming down the hall.” - anonymous member of Flyby Blog.

\r\n\r\n

“Is it kosher to pet a pig?” - students at another petting zoo.

\r\n\r\n

“I called you last night because I knew you would still be awake trying to pick your classes” - friend to anonymous member of Flyby Blog (ouch).

\r\n\r\n

“It’s my last time seeing everyone for the first time.” :( - pre-nostalgic senior taking photos on Widener Steps.

\r\n\r\n

Best of luck with classes, everyone, and we hope this is the best semester yet!

', [ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-de0fb08e06b03d6427e16e32142e974497f64b9d}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2025/09/03/132134_1379990.png.1500x999_q95_crop-smart_upscale.png', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='large', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='Community bonding.', hovertext=None, contributors=, ]>)])

('

{shortcode-14b6c8070ea5f1446d007db1df77c3e0623c3d04}

\r\n\r\n

Dear Professor ______ (insert name here),

\r\n\r\n

I hope you are doing well. My name is _______ (your name) and I’m a ______ (class year) concentrating in _______ (concentration). I know it’s ______ (current time and its relation to add/drop), but I am ______ (adverb suggesting barely contained desperation) interested in taking your course.

\r\n\r\n

This class will allow me to explore topics such as ______ (something you copy-pasted from the syllabus without reading) and ______ (another syllabus bullet point) that shape our world. It would be such a(n) ______ (flattering adverb) opportunity to take your class as it aligns exactly with my interests in _____ (made-up career path) and what I hope to pursue in the future.

\r\n\r\n

I should mention that I have ______ (impressive but irrelevant experience) and once ______ (humble brag disguised as relevant experience). I'm particularly drawn to this course because ______ (lie) and I believe my ______ (personal quality you’re overselling) would contribute to class discussions.

\r\n\r\n

Please let me know if there’s anything I can do to secure a spot in your class. I’m willing to ______ (desperate measure) if necessary.

\r\n\r\n

Thank you very much.

\r\n\r\n

Sincerely,

\r\n\r\n

_____ (your name)

', [ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-14b6c8070ea5f1446d007db1df77c3e0623c3d04}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2025/09/02/131233_1379960.png.1500x1202_q95_crop-smart_upscale.jpg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='large', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='Mad Lib Petition.', hovertext=None, contributors=, ]>)])

('

{shortcode-311b415467aae35b93c3a7932d49ff85310adc1b}Now that you have a very expensive piece of paper to hang on your wall, your college career is a part of your past. All the late nights, tears, and laughter are something to reminisce over… and something to add to your résumé. The fourth (and final) day of our Commencement Week feature is a chance to reflect on your time on campus — because we know it’s about so much more than a diploma.

\r\n\r\n

Not So Fast, Grad

\r\n\r\n

Okay, we’re super duper proud that you’ve finally earned your diploma, but you’re crazy if you think that’s all it takes to consider yourself a true alum. Your social achievements matter, too. Have you passed muster?

\r\n\r\n

Did You Do Harvard Right?

\r\n\r\n

No one makes it through college without a few ups and downs — an unfortunate truth that the perfectionists among us might have trouble processing. If you’re having trouble deciding where you ended up on the ladder of success, let us help.

', [ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-311b415467aae35b93c3a7932d49ff85310adc1b}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2025/05/30/164158_1379498.png.1500x1000_q95_crop-smart_upscale.png', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='large', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption=None, hovertext=None, contributors=]>)])

('

{shortcode-f4b0f65b087a32c5a5255857ded63ed7de782d5d}Sure, everyone tells you that there’s not any one way to do college “right,” but let’s be honest — there are some wrong ways. Not sure if you can be proud of your time on campus? Our quiz will decide for you.

\r\n\r\n

{shortcode-487e0b6c2a94a835ba0fb739d18b47fce2414f07}

', [ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-f4b0f65b087a32c5a5255857ded63ed7de782d5d}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2025/05/30/164335_1379501.png.1500x1000_q95_crop-smart_upscale.png', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='large', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption=None, hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeWidgetGQL(key='{shortcode-487e0b6c2a94a835ba0fb739d18b47fce2414f07}', widget=, pos='center', size='large', caption=None, contributors=]>)])

('

{shortcode-b9309391c8e807d955b874a266deb771fab9854b}You’ve submitted your thesis. You’ve folded and packed your grad gown. Your parents booked a hotel in Cambridge that cost a semester’s worth of tuition.

\r\n\r\n

You did everything you needed to graduate…right?

\r\n\r\n

Truth is, walking the stage didn’t mean you met all your requirements. No, not the ones you skimmed

\r\n\r\n

through on my.harvard while Googling, “is a 3.69 technically cum laude?” I’m talking about the rites of passage that mark a true Harvardian — the ones you would be quizzed on in the Suits multiverse to check if you really went to Harvard.

\r\n\r\n

Section crushes? Library all-nighters? Comping trauma? Galore. We’ve all had them.

\r\n\r\n

Unless, of course, you haven't. In that case, you have one final chance to pull off the ultimate buzzer-beater and earn your unofficial social degree before you leave campus this year.

\r\n\r\n

Now, take out your metaphorical punch card and see if you really graduated from the big H.

\r\n\r\n

Sidechat Fame

\r\n\r\n

Did you have your moment? Your anonymous fifteen minutes of fame? If you’ve cracked >100 upvotes on a single post, you can confidently say that you have.

\r\n\r\n

No, it doesn’t count if your post was begging everyone to mass-email your professor to bump the class average (an A- will not kill you) (touch grass guys) (go outside and breathe air).

\r\n\r\n

Instead, your post must have sparked laughter. Forged community. Have been filled with language so incisive, humor so disarmingly astute, wit so unnervingly precise that users were left wondering: “Who wrote this? Can we be friends? Or fall in love? Or both?”

\r\n\r\n

Which is precisely why there should have been a grand unveiling of Sidechat’s leaderboard celebrities at graduation. Radio Rebel-style.

\r\n\r\n

Show yourselves. For the people. For the bit.

\r\n\r\n

G-cal-ing Your Shower

\r\n\r\n

Welcome to the academic underworld! It is only accessible via the Lamont elevator and reserved for when you’re forty lectures behind, you have a final tomorrow, and your shower time needs to be budgeted by the second.

\r\n\r\n

There is no free will, there is only Google Calendar.

\r\n\r\n

All Harvard students know, if it’s not on the calendar, it’s not happening. How else will you make sure your personal hygiene doesn’t bleed into the “Lecture #4” & “Overthink that one section comment from 3 weeks ago” slots?

\r\n\r\n

You also get major bonus points if you’ve carved out time for breakdowns: “Crying in the MAC: 5:15-5:30 p.m. Hard stop.”

\r\n\r\n

Because at the end of the day, you didn’t run your schedule at Harvard — your schedule ran you.

\r\n\r\n

Lamonstering for a Night

\r\n\r\n

It started innocently enough. You went to Lamont to make some “meaningful progress” on that double-spaced, 15-page paper you had due in the morning. Next thing you know, it’s 5:43 a.m., the sun is rising, you’re hyper aware of your newly formed eyebags, your spine is shaped like a question mark, and you’re sipping the last of your stale, soy-milk latte from Lamont Cafe (they were out of whole milk again).

\r\n\r\n

Not to mention, you’ve been holding your pee for seven hours just to avoid the Lamont bathrooms, which reek of despair and someone’s regrettable HUDS dinner.

\r\n\r\n

At some point, you check your progress and come to a horrifying realization: your hours-per-page rate is slower than your minutes-per-mile. You are somehow both illiterate and unathletic. Congratulations.

\r\n\r\n

You didn’t just pull an all-nighter. You haven’t spoken aloud in over 10 hours. You have morphed into one of the Lamonsters you have been warned of before. Vacant eyes. Hoodie up. Laptop glowing.

\r\n\r\n

Did you really go to Harvard if you didn’t have this descent into fluorescent-lit madness?

\r\n\r\n

Lost a Friend to Consulting

\r\n\r\n

They used to be full of joy — promise even. They used to paint, laugh, and smile. Their Harvard applications once said things like “I want to make a difference and be a force for good.”

\r\n\r\n

Then, came the info sessions, the tote bags, and the free sushi. Suddenly, you’re hearing the words “It’ll just be for two years” from the same friend who once wanted to run a community goat farm in Vermont. Classic last words.

\r\n\r\n

Now, you wake up to the buzzing sound of Slack notifications from their phone. They whisper weird words like “client-facing” in their sleep. They unironically ask if you could “circle back” to grabbing a meal together.

\r\n\r\n

You nod. You smile. You grieve. Congratulations, MBB killed your best friend’s personality, and you can finally join the thousands of other mournful Harvard alumni who can say the same.

\r\n\r\n

Saying Goodbye To Your Characters

\r\n\r\n

No, these are not your friends. Not your blockmates. Not even your old situationships you avoid making eye contact with at the CVS self-checkout.

\r\n\r\n

We are talking about the recurring characters in the movie of your college life, the ones with virtually no speaking lines but a looming presence. The characters you’ve unlocked and now suddenly see everywhere.

\r\n\r\n

You’ve talked about them with your friends, you’ve assigned them personalities, and you’ve built entire narratives around them. From the girl who always raised her hand in EC1010a to the guy who was always in the dhall when you were, you begin to wonder if they remember you the same way you remember them.

\r\n\r\n

The worst part is, these goodbyes are the hardest. You have virtually no way to stay in touch, but you’ll miss the way they quietly filled the background of your days.

\r\n\r\n

Part of graduating is letting go of the strangers who’ve shaped your life without ever knowing they were in it.

\r\n\r\n

So no, you can’t just post your Widener thesis photos and proceed through Johnston Gate. To really graduate from Harvard, you have to laugh, overschedule, work all night, spend time with your friends, fall in love with strangers, and somehow find joy in the small chaotic moments that make Harvard home.

\r\n\r\n

Only then can you really say goodbye <3.

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('

{shortcode-1bb34172b2e6ad300be35a9d516c3f90507afaa3}The day is finally here. It’s now time to say goodbye. Our third day of Commencement Week content shares our musings on all the ways to say goodbye to campus — and to each other. We hope you’ll appreciate our attempts to use humor as a coping mechanism.

\r\n\r\n

Memorializing Yourself on Campus

\r\n\r\n

Seniors, you might be receiving your diplomas this morning, but there’s one last assignment for you to complete before you leave campus: leaving a lasting impression. Sure, you could’ve started on this during your first semester, but what would your college career look like without a little bit of procrastination?

\r\n\r\n

Graduating? Here’s Seven Ways to Say Goodbye to Harvard

\r\n\r\n

Even if you’ll be in the Boston area postgrad, we doubt you’ll be spending quite as much time in these hallowed halls (or on these overly manicured lawns). And even if you become yet another tourist terrorizing visiting campus far too often, you’ll never ever be a college student again (sorry). So pause and dedicate a moment (or a few) to saying farewell.

', [ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-1bb34172b2e6ad300be35a9d516c3f90507afaa3}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2025/05/29/102436_1379425.png.1500x1000_q95_crop-smart_upscale.png', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='large', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption=None, hovertext=None, contributors=]>)])

('

{shortcode-a38804eee63b354c579b9dea3e04031cf5690e91}

\r\n\r\n

You did it. You survived Ec10, CS50, blocking drama, Lamont at 2 a.m., and the heartbreak of not getting into the Adams House dhall for two years. Now, as the gates of Harvard Yard close behind you (metaphorically, unless you lost your ID again), here are seven ways to say goodbye — some heartfelt, some hilarious, and all very Harvard.

\r\n\r\n

Take a Victory Lap Around the Yard

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Literally jog, stroll, or cartwheel your way past every building where you once cried over a pset, made a lifelong friend, or panic-wrote a paper at 3 a.m. This is your main character montage — cue the Good Will Hunting score.

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Write Yourself a Letter, Then “Lose” it in Widener

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Pen a letter to your future self and tuck it into a random Widener book. Ideally, something no one checks out (so like 90 percent of the books). Like The Rise and Fall of the Harvard Student Agencies Tax Policy Manual, Vol. 3 (idk if this is real). You’ll either find it when you visit… or haunt Widener forever.

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Stage a Personal Commencement in the Science Center Plaza

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Get a robe, your diploma, and walk dramatically across the plaza while your roommate plays your favorite tune (preferably from Dean Khurana’s playlist) on a Bluetooth speaker. Loudly. If tourists take photos, even better.

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Start One Last HUDS Food Fight

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Every senior has a HUDS hot take — the chili, weekend burgers, or cookies that hit different. It’s finally time to honor the chaos. Rank every dhall. Post your HUDS tier list. Start a Sidechat fight. Bonus points if you finally settle the age-old mystery: Were there laxatives in the eggs, or was that just a mass hallucination? Either way, you survived HUDS. That deserves a farewell bite.

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Steal a Brick (Figuratively, I Swear)

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Not from an actual building — relax! But take a piece of something mundane and sacred to you: A flyer from the Smith Center, a lamp photo from the Barker Center, or a selfie with a Yard chair. Your weird memento = your final goodbye.

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Say Thank You (Even if It’s Cringy)

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To your amazing, splendid TF. To that one security guard who always let you in even when you forgot your ID. To the classmate who let you copy the reading (or homework). To your first-year proctor who saw you cry outside of your building. It’s Harvard — it’s built on people, not just legacy.

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Cry Over Your Last FlyBy Meal (We Won’t Judge)

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It’s not just a sandwich. It’s every rushed FlyBy grab, every sad burger line at Eliot, every “Wait… is this chicken?” moment in the dhall. Take a moment to mourn the most controversial cuisine of your college years. Will you miss it? Unclear. Will you think about it while ordering overpriced Sweetgreen at your 9-to-5? Abso-freaking-lutely.

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No matter how you say goodbye — whether a stroll through the Yard, a chaotic HUDS feast on a lawn (or at Cronk), or a whispered “thank you” to your favorite overly expensive red chair — just know that your time here mattered. Harvard will keep going (very loudly, stressfully, and ultimately dramatically), but you get to walk away with memories, a degree, and a mild caffeine addiction. So take your moment. Hug your people. Eat that last burger. And then? Go be legen-“wait-for-it”-dary. Or at least mildly competent… We’ll take either.

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