How strange that the Harvard parietal stir
Should have caused such anxietal flying of fur
When it wasn't alarming, outre or berserk,
But just the co-edipus complex at work.
General Alarm
I am the very model of the modern Major-General,
In mufti at the moment, for in Washington those men are all
Subversive Kremlin agents, commy-symps, and un-American,
Which means a patriot must shout his message when and where he can;
I taught my soldiers politics, I helped them with their balloting;
I gave those sluggish unwashed minds some badly needed valeting;
I told the world the facts about the communist conspiracy--
An educated man like I can make such matters clearer, see?
You'd think my country'd thank me in some large or even puny form--
A medal and a few more stars to ornament my uniform--
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