To Epps, a good iron to smooth over relations,
To Counter and Gravelle, some long-term vacations.
To Latino students who have something to say,
Skip Gates as an example of progress some day.
To the old boys' network in all of its glories
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A push off a building with seventeen stories.
To students of Lee, a big pile of film passes;
They'll learn so much there, they won't need his classes.
To C-Minus Mansfield, some needles, cloth and thread,
As "little ladies" scream, "Off with his head!!"
To Michael P. Berry, Messiah no more,
A new set of menus, our food's been so poor
We're tired of chicken, oh so weary, you see,
Just surviving on pasta bar, bread and soft brie.
To the Ad Board, those judges of social taboo,
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