Euro-artsy students are assigned to Adams.

Preppy students are assigned to Eliot.

Some athletes are assigned to Kirkland.

The other athletes are assigned to Leverett.

Group I students are assigned to Lowell.

Minorities are assigned to Currier.

Happy students who like decorating Christmas Trees, attending house formals, and playing "gottcha" are assigned to Winthrop.

Happy students who think Winthrop is "too juvenile" are assigned to Quincy.

Unhappy students are assigned to Dunster, Mather, North, and Cabot.

Administrators declare the benefits of diversity.

April

Monday, 4--Harvard's governing Corporation agrees to consider the Board of Overseer's recommendation that the University divest of its South Africa-related holdings. "Golly," says President Bok, "What a good idea. Why didn't that ever occur to Henry and me?"

Wednesday, 20--In order to keep overall tuition raises to a minimum, acceptance letters will go out today to an incoming class of 13,567 students. "We figured we'd let them all in this year," said Dean William Fitzimmons, "After all, there was an unusually high number of candidates from old Harvard families."

Friday, 22--Professor Glenn C. Loury is not charged with a felony today.

May