A Quincy House Film Society showing of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs is halted by angry members of the Harvard-Radcliffe Troll Association. Chanting "Walt Disney, stop your lies: we're gonna cut you down to size," the protesters topple the projector. In an open letter to the Harvard community, six Nieman fellows denounce the trolls for "seriously undermining the liberties we all hold dear." "This is how things started in Germany," the letter concludes.

The rugby team is forced to cancel the remainder of its schedule after half its starters come down with cirrhosis of the liver. The Harvard-Yale football game ends in a boring 0-0 tie. At a hastily called press conference afterwards, Bok announces that "they're right--Harvard does such," and lays off hockey coach Billy Cleary '56, "just to shake things up."

Martin Bormann delivers the first of his Godkin lectures on foreign policy, "The Big Fib." Forty-five thousand NAM protesters, chanting "Martin Bormann, we're no fools: we know Nazis are fascist tools," picket peacefully, three blocks away.

To celebrate Thanksgiving, Bok auctions off Plymouth Rock. In a special Thanksgiving Day broadcast from Attica, N.Y., President Rockefeller acknowledges that "many people find being out of work difficult," but advises them to "count their blessings, just as I do."

December

To celebrate Pearl Harbor Day, Bok lays off all Japanese at Harvard and confines them to Sever 11. To celebrate Chanukah, he lays of all Jews at Harvard. "This will save a lot of money," Bok says, "and besides, they were too goddamned pushy."

Martin Peretz, munching a pork chop, takes up his new duties as special lecturer on Mormonism. "Gene says give the system one more chance," Peretz says. "Liberals like myself believe in religious pluralism." Rockefeller bombs Hanoi for Christmas.

Harvard's most vigorous opponent of the Buckley Amendment, Alan E. Heimert '49, chairman of the English Department, is laid off after a routine check of his files reveals that he forged his letters of recommendation to Harvard in 1945. "This Leviathan-like traducing of my personal privacy pisses me off," Heimert snorts. Special Delivery News Service runs a full-page Crimson advertisement urging subscribers who do not receive their papers to "Give us what we deserve." Later that morning, The Crimson building at 14 Plympton St. is fire-bombed. Nearby, Pat McInally explains to two children and their Irish Setter that he "still can't make up my mind between a Rhodes and the pros."

In a tearful final press conference at Harvard, ex-president Bok announces that he has been laid off, but offers words of encouragement to his former students. "If you went to Stanford University in Palo Alto, Calif., then you might have to worry about a job," Bok says, "but here at Harvard you have nothing to worry about."