Contributing opinion writer
Mireya Sánchez-Maes
Mireya Sánchez-Maes ’24 is a joint concentrator in English and Theater, Dance, and Media in Currier House. Her column “Insect Insights” appears on alternate Wednesdays.
Latest Content
Kinda Late, Completely Legit, Not-at-all Satirical Tips for Surviving Without AC
Does your dorm room feel like Dante’s seventh circle of hell? Are you looking more and more like a microwaved popsicle? If so, congratulations on completing your first week at Harvard University!
Read a Book! Write a Rhyme!
Rhymes are often thought to be what only kids enjoy, but sometimes simple, silly stuff can bring the greatest joy! And so it is my hope for us that maybe over time, we’ll learn to find the joy in life. We’ll learn to find the rhyme.
Harvard’s Not Diverse. That’s Perverse.
If you run a school that has some students and some teachers, and you want diversity to be one of your features, you can’t just stop at undergrads. That simply just won’t do. True diversity means you need diverse teachers, too.
Stop Pretending You’re Poor
Cause what these students fail to see and others just ignore, is that being upper-middle class does not mean you are poor. The average Harvard income is like, far above the norm and financial stability can help kids to perform.
Housing Day. Yay.
Don’t cry if you get Quadded. And please don’t close the door. Cause all the Harvard houses have stuff to be happy for.
Don’t Be a Bro, Yo
Just know that there’s a million ways someone can be a bro. But they’re all pretty bad, so like, don’t do it, yo.
A(verse) to Legacy Admissions
So yeah, I hope by now I’ve been real clear ‘bout my position. Harvard, it’s high time we ditched the legacy admission.
Have Some Fun, Hon
So what’s this first piece all about? What’s column number one? People at this school, it seems, Feel guilty having fun.
Oh my Gawd I Got a Bee
If you worked as hard as you possibly can and earned a Bee, then congrats! You should feel proud of your personal growth and hard work. Conversely, if you got a 4.0 GPA, but didn’t learn anything or cheated your way into it, then the accomplishment is empty. True learning is about personal growth, and grades can be misleading.
If Harvard Students Were Honest…
As a Harvard student, I’m tremendously grateful for the opportunity to expand my intellectual horizons by spending copious amounts of time in your mandatory writing class. As a human teenager, though, I hate it with the passion of a thousand suns.
Mother Nature was an English Major
So the next time someone tells you they’re majoring in the humanities, don’t laugh and offer to pay for their unemployment. I mean, if you REALLY wanna donate money, I guess that’s fine. I could use some new socks. But other than that, a simple, “Woah, cool! Please invite me to your film screening,” will suffice.
Help! I Think I’m Privileged!
DEAR ABEE: I am writing today with a startling and troublesome revelation – I think that “privilege” may exist. Mostly, because everyone keeps telling me I have it.
The Giant Millipede & the Subtle Art of Not Complaining
Too often, our minds tend to fixate on the negative. We obsess over things we don’t have. We constantly compare ourselves to others. We critique before we compliment. To be fair, as a satirist – and more importantly, as a low-income Latina – it’s abundantly clear that an elite institution like Harvard has a lot to critique. But that work gets tiring, fast. And if we forget to take stock of the amazing gifts we have, we risk losing our ability to see them in the first place.
An Intimate Portrait of an Insect in Love
You are a young and talented short-horned grasshopper. Your real name is “Syrbula admirabilis” but everyone calls you Chad. You’re hungry. And although Harvard University Dining Services more than accommodates your aggressively vegan diet of grasses and seeds, this hunger is different. It’s deeper, more intimate, and makes you think of that one slow song from the movie with the animated lions. You, Chad, are hungry for love.
The Antlion & How Not To Be An Insatiable Blood-Sucker
While most commonly found in dry, sandy areas, Harvard’s high-stakes (and occasionally carnivorous) environment provides the perfect breeding ground for antlions. From overtly competitive student politicians to ride-or-die Goldman Sachs hopefuls, it’s easy to recognize the combination of ambition, focus, and drive that the insect is known for. And while ambition can be helpful in moderation, too often, our relentless pursuit of success inadvertently hurts the people around us or leaves us lonely and miserable. The antlion can offer three key insights into our behavior.
