The blog of The Harvard Crimson

Flyby Investigates: Is Snowport Worth It?

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For undergraduates across the Northeast, the frosty threat of snow cover and 4 p.m. sunsets mean two things: it’s time to lock into your favorite library and prep for finals… and time to take every second away from your computer to savor the cusp of the holiday season.

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In Boston, nothing says winter festivities better than the cookie-cutter Hallmark dreamscape bordering the Atlantic: Snowport Village. Snowport exists as the Boston legend of holiday cheer — just 40 minutes away on the Red and Green (festive!) lines, it promises rich, tangy hot cider, tempered-chocolate pianos, and kitschy bobbles of every holiday shape, color, and size. But beyond its Willy Wonka exterior, any visitor knows that each handcrafted stall and ornamental delicacy is bound to drain your wallet. So, are the wonders of Snowport worth the prolonged commute and colossal costs?

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It was up to us to find out.

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After taking our first round of finals, we hopped into an Uber to Snowport to reward ourselves with some trinkets and sweet treats… because what more could you ask for? Armed with $50 — more than any finals-depleted college student could hope to spend away on a random Thursday — and a dream, we wandered through the stalls, looking at their different wares and trying to see what we could get with our semi-generous budget (thank you Flyby!).

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At 1 p.m., Snowport was pretty empty. However, there were still people milling about and purchasing treats and gifts for themselves and their loved ones. We came to the conclusion that Snowport’s real charm is experienced in the dark, with glittery LED arches bordering the stalls, so maybe that’s why entering felt a bit underwhelming.

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Our first turn into the maze of stalls, tents, and trailers led us to the savory snacking area: specifically, a Mexican food truck. As starving academics, we felt much obliged to support the small businesses there, with which our stomachs were very much in agreement. Mirika got an avocado taco from the food truck, which was pretty filling at a reasonable price point ($5) especially compared to some of the other stands.

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After prudently filling our stomachs, we wandered around some of the other stalls to check out the sweet treats and dessert stands, which is when a cookie shop caught our eye. While all of the flavors were equally enticing, we ended up getting the Funfetti cookie, which brought back nostalgic memories with every bite.

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Then it was time to turn our attention to the wares Snowport is arguably most famous for: their holiday beverages. Led to the Apple Cider Donut stand by the cinnamony smell wafting up from their fryers, we ultimately landed on a hot cider rather than the tried and tested hot chocolate (but come on, we already knew that was going to be good). This was the moment we began filing for bankruptcy. While it was one of the most delicious and spicy hot ciders this side of the Prime Meridian, the small sized drink (literally smaller than Laasya’s palm) rang in at a whopping $7.00: full dollars more than a large matcha at prime time Blank Street. Watch out, Nara Smith, we will be boiling and juicing our own apples from now on.

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Stomachs full, thirst quenched, and pockets in pain, it was time to weave through the wintery maze and window-shop for objects we couldn’t ingest. Luckily for us, every possible thing one would never need was up for sale. Don’t get us wrong, we wanted to buy every single one of the stained glass baubles and chopstick baskets, but unless we could switch out the $70 price tag for our weight in rocks or get rid of a zero, we simply had to put the objects back and move on. We were especially tempted to spend it all when we found an opportunity to spend “One short day in the Emerald City,” but unfortunately, its price tag was defying gravity.

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We did, however, end up making one final purchase from a stand that caught our eye for its mission. Refugee women crocheted/knitted beautiful ornaments for this nonprofit organization (Refugee Protection International), and proceeds went back to helping support these women and their families. We returned with a cute ornament for the Flyby office and the knowledge that our final dollars were spent to support a deserving cause, in line with the warm fuzzy holiday spirit of giving.

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Ultimately, our afternoon in Snowport was a much needed respite from earlier hours spent in Lamont. The holiday cheer, endless supply of couples in matching Canada Goose parkas and fuzzy earmuffs, and aesthetic samplings of holly, wreaths, and colorful winter assortments kept our frowns away. But be warned, Snowport serves more as a museum with endless gift shops than as a holiday market. A worthy excursion for a walk through winter wonderland, but not to buy all of your entryway mates holiday presents.

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Harvard Houses as Iconic Christmas Songs

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{shortcode-f232dede77d8eb47045dad48f4cf95b176e9b83e} On the 12th Day of Christmas my true love gave to me… 12 Harvard Houses!

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It’s officially that time of year when we’re all collectively trenched, freezing, and waking up only to see the sun set shortly after, with only small doses of serotonin provided by Christmas music breaks in between loops of instrumental, lo-fi beats. Looking for a song to break up the monotony? See which song your house embodies and get into the spirit of holiday cheer (or try your best to; it’s rough out here)!

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Adams: “Silent Night” by Frank Sinatra

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If you are planning on pulling a dhall all-nighter, the Inn is not the place to be, that is unless you are looking for a Widener Loker Room, can’t cough out loud, silent night kind of vibe. Adams is out there doing their own thing, but maybe check in on your Adams friends since I haven’t heard from mine in a while. Hope all is calm and all is bright!

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Pforzheimer: “Baby It’s Cold Outside” by Dean Martin

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Pfoho — home to polar bears and the Igloo. It sure is chilly over there, as is the journey over. The duet aspect of this song is what I imagine a conversation involving someone just trying to go back home to the River and being convinced to stay a little longer would sound like.

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Lowell: “Carol of the Bells” by Mykola Leontovych

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An obvious choice. What Lowell lacks in house community, they make up for with their infamous bell tower. A timeless song with many renovated renditions. Can I put in a request for Lowell to play Carol of the Bells on the bells? So meta.

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Currier: “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” by Brenda Lee

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Another obvious choice. The spirit and cheer of this song emulate the spirit and cheer carried by the Tree community. With the many drop-ins from people coming from Harvard Dance Center right nearby, everyone sure is dancing merrily.

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Cabot: “Snowman” by Sia

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Have you ever seen the TikTok trend where you try to sing the whole chorus in one breath? Now try this: walking from the Yard to the Quad in one breath. Cabot residents seem to save the trip and stay home, so maybe the lyric “I want you to know that I’m never leaving” is actually biographical.

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Quincy: “All I Want for Christmas is You” by Mariah Carey

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THE song of Christmas and THE people’s house? The pairing is undoubtedly a match made in holiday heaven. Mariah Carey, the queen of Christmas. You know her, and you love her just like you know and love Quincy for all the charm, community, and hot breakfast that we have to offer (totally unbiased opinion as a Quincy resident myself).

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Mather: “Grandma Got Ran Over by a Reindeer” by Elmo & Patsy

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If Grandma had to make the trek from Northwest back to Mather, I fear she would not live long enough to arrive at her destination. An unfortunate run-in with a reindeer or a crash into concrete? Both seem to be on the same level #staysafeoutthere.

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Winthrop: “Do You Hear What I Hear” by Whitney Houston

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Winthrop is in the optimal position to listen in on the bustling noises of campus. Stationed right along Memorial Drive and next to the Lowell Bell Tower, they definitely have a prime location to listen to the night winds and Sunday bells that the rest of us don’t.

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Kirkland: “I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas” by Gayla Peevey

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Kirkland community is loud and proud, and I have no doubt that they would rally behind getting something as unique as a hippopotamus for Christmas. Perhaps they have a new theme to consider for their next Choosening!

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Dunster: “Run, Rudolph, Run” by Chuck Berry

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While the house with the most athletes seems to be a debate, it’s worth mentioning that Dunster has extended dining hall hours to accommodate athletes, closing an hour later than the rest of the houses. Whether they are running to make the end of dinner or running during conditioning, this song seems appropriate, not to mention their mascot being a moose (moose, reindeer, close enough). The Cambridge half-marathon route also runs right by Dunster, so it only seemed fitting.

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Leverett: “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus” by The Jackson 5

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Never underestimate the power of Lev towers. With a bird’s-eye view that extends quite far, one look out the window opens up all of Cambridge. Once, I saw one of my TFs on a run from that height, so yeah, the possibilities are endless. If you can spot that one kid you had section with freshman year from the window, I’m sure you can catch Santa Claus being a lover boy.

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Eliot: “Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays” by NYSYNC

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Tucked in a little cul-de-sac of the River Houses, Eliot and this song feel like a good way to round off the playlist. With the domus community as the life of the party, I believe they’d wish us all a Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays!

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All songs have their own vibe and spirit, but all contribute to the greater holiday joy that brings us together, just like all 12 houses of the student community. Happy holidays!

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How To Be A Chill Guy During Finals

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Reading period has officially begun and finals are just a few days away, meaning the last-minute scramble to self-teach an entire course’s material is in full swing. The resident Lamonsters will be more stressed than ever, with more coming out of the shadows (or staying in them…) as the days until exams tick down. One may think that having no classes or club meetings during reading period would leave students feeling free and social, but in Harvard fashion, it is quite the opposite. Those texts you send to grab a meal at the dhall will begin to go unanswered as people fall deeper into the trenches. All in all, the days leading up to finals are some of the most stressful that a student will experience, thus why Flyby recommends the ultimate solution: channel your inner Chill Guy. At the end of the day, who doesn’t want to just be a chill guy who lowkey doesn’t gaf. We put together a few ways in which you can channel Chill Guy’s spirit during finals week.

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Don’t set alarms

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With no 9 a.m. Justice section to struggle to get to in the morning and no pressure to get an early morning workout in because of a packed schedule, let yourself sleep in before finals. Sleep is one of the most important, and most overlooked, ways to prepare yourself for an exam. You may be able to brag to your friends about pulling an all-nighter in Cabot, but showing up late or exhausted to an exam is not worth the trade-off. Chill Guy definitely is in touch with his circadian rhythm, letting his body get ample rest when needed. Do not let an alarm define you: just be a chill guy and wake up when your body wants to.

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Avoid over-studying

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Even though it may seem like it when talking to your most dedicated peers, studying is not a competition. For some, spending every waking hour reviewing notes might be what they require, but for most, a simple few-hour-a-day study plan is all you need. Unless you did not attend a single lecture this semester and now have the monumental task of going through 13 weeks of material in one, be a chill guy about your studying. Instead of logging dozens of pointless hours studying minute things, focus on what really matters and spend your new-found free time having some fun before flying home for winter break.

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Leave the Harvard bubble

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The week before finals can be an eerie and quiet time on campus, with people clocking whole days in your favorite study spots. To avoid wandering around the library for 20 minutes trying to find a free chair, head out to Boston for a day. Take a few friends and plan to camp out in a cute café on Newbury St. or spend a few hours in the beautiful Boston Public Library; anywhere that is away from campus. Leaving the bubble is a great way to remind yourself that you are more than just a studying robot, and it is important to experience life. Chill Guy is always out in nature, living his life, and just because it is finals week does not mean you can’t do the same.

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Good outfits, every day

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Chill Guy’s staple outfit is one of the key factors in his atmosphere of chillness. He starts his day knowing that he’ll have a good outfit and be confident in it. You, dear Flyby reader, should follow in his footsteps. Putting extra emphasis on having a good outfit for the day can make a world of difference in your productivity and mood. You know what they say: look good, feel good. Throw on your best sweater, jeans, and nice shoes combo to match Chill Guy, or explore your own rendition of his staple outfit. Studying all day can be strenuous and monotonous, little things like a good outfit can go a long way.

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Remember one exam won’t decide your entire future

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You have probably heard this one countless times, and Chill Guy would say it to you again. Finals are an important part of the college academic experience, but that does not mean every other aspect of your life has to go out the window until they are over. Find a good balance of fun and locking in, preparing for a final does not have to be a hellish task. As long as you do your best, that is all anyone can ask of themselves. Contrary to the probable belief of freshmen in Math 55a, your final exams do not define you as a person. What you will be known for, though, is if you were a chill guy.

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No matter who you talk to about finals, you will likely get the same response: that we are all stressed together. Even though it is tempting to sign your life away to the library for the week leading up to exams, that is the worst way to go about it. Instead, take Flyby’s expert advice and channel that inner Chill Guy. Make finals week a fun and productive time – the goal of college for most. Lowkey, don’t gaf!

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Predict Your Finals Performance: A Reading Period Personality Quiz

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{shortcode-ee5dc1574eef61a854937f1dcab531b3cd8424b7}Winter break is fast approaching, and reading period is here. With all of this extra time on your hands, you can’t help but ponder how on earth you are going to get through another holiday season single — what, who said that? I mean, how will you create the best study plan to ace your finals? Take this quiz to find out how well (or not) you will do on your finals this semester, based on how you plan on spending your reading period!

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What do you anticipate your sleeping habits to be like during reading period?

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a. Sleep? Never heard of her. I’ll be too busy studying.

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b. I’ll be getting my full 8 hours!

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c. With these back-to-back formals, I’ll be sleeping until 4 p.m. every day.

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Have you started studying for your finals?

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a. Absolutely — I’ve already reviewed all my lectures from the semester and have made 10 study guides.

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b. Not yet, but I’ve mapped out my study plan!

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c. I still have a week — what’s the rush?

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Your friend asks you to go on a day trip into Boston during reading period. What do you say?

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a. Politely decline. There’s way too much studying to do.

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b. Sure! I need a study break anyway.

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c. Let’s go to NYC instead. I’ve been to Boston three times this week already.

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What is your go-to beverage this reading period?

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a. Shots of straight espresso. How else are you going to fuel your brain for the long study hours ahead of you?

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b. Iced Sugar Cookie Almond Milk Latte. Gotta get into the festive spirit! (I complain about being broke 24/7 then proceed to spend $7 on a coffee every day.)

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c. Shots of straight tequila. On a side note, who wants to pregame their Chem 17 final with me?! (I’m joking… maybe.)

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Who was your Spotify Wrapped top artist this year?

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a. Mozart: I’m on my dark academia study grind, and I have no social life!

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b. Taylor Swift: I feel like there doesn’t need to be anything more said about this one.

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c. Pitbull: The party lifestyle never stops.

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What are your plans for the winter break?

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a. Get ahead on my work for next semester by reading the syllabi and doing my course readings!

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b. Binge-watch a new Netflix series.

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c. I’m going on a four-week backpacking trip across Europe with my friends.

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Results:

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Mostly A’s: Nervous about your finals? Don’t be. You have nothing to worry about. The finals should fear you instead. (Also, please consider getting some therapy.)

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Mostly B’s: You’re going to knock your finals out of the park! You have a great balance between your work and social life, and you will kill it!

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Mostly C’s: It’s OK, we can’t be good at everything. After getting your grades back, you might consider extending your Europe backpacking trip! Who needs a degree anyways?

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How To: Cope with the Constant Risk of Hypothermia (ft. Daylight Savings)

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{shortcode-11e2a3bc4b1d1087ca57ed05ad7177a5ed783c2c}The first Sunday of November has come and gone (blown away by the freezing cold gusts, no doubt), and thus begins our annual winter ritual of living as the basement-dwelling Lamonsters in the great state of Massachusetts. That is, when the sun acts like we all do when our psets aren’t due yet: call it a day at 5 p.m. It seems even the hottest thing in our solar system (no, not your age-inappropriate TF crush) has given up on the freezing temperatures here. For those of you whose sections run from 4:30 to 5:45 p.m., you won’t even get to see this phenomenon; all you’ll know is that you went to class in the daytime, and by the time you left that cramped classroom in some random corner of Science Center, it’s pitch black outside and you nearly just broke your neck slipping cartoon-style on that frozen puddle (we’re sorry for your loss). The rest of us aren't so lucky either. How can we be expected to trudge through this coming finals season if the sky is telling our bodies we should be in bed before HUDS even opens the dhalls for dinner? Still, the show must go on. So, sit back, relax, and take a break from your project deliverable as we present our tried-and-true hacks for functioning until March. We’ll wait for you to get those jammies on.

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Read some Flyby articles to refresh your brain (shameless plug, not #sponsored).

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Nothing like a good laugh to keep you going, right?

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If you can’t beat them, join them.

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Seclude yourself to some windowless corner of a library with nothing but your favorite noise-canceling headphones, your paper due at 11:59 p.m., and your GPA on the line. If you’re that deeply entrenched, you gotta do what you gotta do, right? At least here, you won’t be reminded of how dark and cold it is outside: Schröedinger’s sunlight. Afterwards, though, definitely come back and take a look at the rest of this article for ideas.

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Take a walk along the Charles.

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With a friend, with your significant other, with your friend who you wish was your significant other, whatever. We don’t judge. Maybe that’ll motivate you to get out of your dorm and appreciate the beauty of Weeks Bridge and get some fresh air (or just touch grass). Remember what they say: if your bum is numb, your brain is the same. (I don’t remember where I heard this from, but I just Googled it, and apparently, it’s a real phrase).

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Call your friends and family from home, preferably those in another timezone.

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Either you can feel a sense of community if they’re also suffering with you in this winter doom and gloom, or you can live vicariously through your West Coast friends. I’m more of the latter; my UCSD friend, upon picking up the phone today at 5:48 p.m. EST, greeted me with: “Dude, why is it so dark out there?” Thanks for reminding me… (Fun fact: he proceeded to show me the blindingly bright view of sunny La Jolla from outside his window. Bonus fun fact: I’m now looking for new friends.)

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Settle in for a movie night with your roomies.

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It’s totally okay to give in to the temptation once in a while. If you just took that crazy midterm given on the last day of class (Chem 17, I’m looking at you), and this is the first evening you’re seeing a glimmer of hope in your life, embrace it. Get that sweet treat, put on your favorite guilty pleasure show, and convince your friends that you have to enjoy life while you can, and that all of the questions on the final are going to be common sense, and they’ll recognize the answers when they see it. You deserve one evening of chasing away the blues. Popcorn, anyone?

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Make plans in Boston.

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Whether you need to hold each other accountable as you both cozy up in a café on Newbury to lock in together, or you want to go for a night out to one of the seemingly millions of concerts going on recently, remember that the best part of being so close to a city is bursting the bubble to visit said city from time to time. Get a change of scenery, or have plans to look forward to during the week! No matter how poorly your reading period studying is going, we guarantee you’ll make it through with a little reward at the end as encouragement.

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While popping Vitamin D supplements and shrugging on that massive puffer you didn’t want to bring is nowhere near as satisfying as swinging in your courtyard hammocks after class, remember that there is still light in your life even if there is none in the sky. Be kind to yourself, and take a few nights here and there to warm up before you’re buried in equal amounts of work and snow. Besides, there’s always something to be said about not having to wake up at ungodly hours anymore to catch a glimpse of the sunrise, right?

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Every Harvard Square Ice Cream Place, Ranked

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{shortcode-92c20c9cb2b6c1f7506cad912e2b62c9119d23b0}(Tl;dr, go to Van Leeuwen or J.P. Licks.)

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Harvard Square has so many ice cream places. And now that Van Leeuwen has finally opened, it really has SO MANY ice cream places. It’s been eight years since Flyby last definitively ranked these ice cream locales, so as Flyby’s outgoing leaders, we (ESJ and HRO) considered it our final and most important duty to try each and every place so we could determine once and for all where you should spend your hard-earned money on the sweetest of treats.

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{shortcode-001a5105674a935e280cee402a978f84e1a6149c}

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The Methodology

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We visited seven places: Van Leeuwen, Lizzie’s, Taiyaki NYC, Ben & Jerry’s, Amorino, J.P. Licks, and Berryline. We selected these as the seven places in Harvard Square where the primary offering is a frozen treat. (Sorry, Shake Shack and Insomnia Cookies.) At each location, we asked for the “best regular flavor” (d) and the “best dairy-free flavor” (v). Don’t worry, we tipped a lot for being so annoying. Because our priority was avoiding death by ice cream overexposure, we got the smallest size available that would let us get two flavors. We noted any extremities in price, but these places are changing their prices all the time, and we didn’t get consistent sizes, so the prices will not be listed. Instead, we are evaluating texture, flavor, meltiness, variety, novelty, and for dairy-free, how much you can tell it’s dairy-free.

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Each location will feature our observations, our individual ratings of each flavor, and situations in which these ice cream spots would shine (dates, post-performance treats, summer generally). At the end, we will offer our final ranking.

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Our predictions were that HRO would prefer Van Leeuwen, and ESJ would prefer Lizzie’s. One of us was correct; the other was blinded by novelty… and it’s not the one you would expect…

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Van Leeuwen (8.25/10)

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{shortcode-05aa48e00beb3ab5997fa215201944ea9d0ee3f7}

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Great for: dates, post-Loeb celebrations, pretending you’re a New Yorker.

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We started out at the new arrival for purely geographical reasons. The very informative ice cream connoisseur behind the counter recommended Brown Butter Cookie Dough Brownie (d) and Banana Bread Pudding with Fudge Swirls (v). We then sat in the spacious front area to eat our first of many ice creams of the evening. The night was young; we were hungry.

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{shortcode-d6d542f64e51b876a03274ffba63c86ce0871fc0}

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Brown Butter Cookie Dough Brownie (d): All the named flavors came through in this very sweet concoction. It was a smooth experience, with nothing awe-inspiring but no disappointments. Because we had both had Van Leeuwen before, neither of us thought it was necessarily the best flavor. But we had to stick to our methodology that we had made up on the sidewalk outside five minutes prior.

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ESJ rating: 7/10

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HRO rating: 8/10

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Banana Bread Pudding with Fudge Swirls (v): We were, quite frankly, shocked at how rich this non-dairy ice cream was. The banana was banana-ing. It didn’t taste vegan, though the more xanthan-gummy, icier texture gave it away. No matter. This was a great start to the night.

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ESJ rating: 9/10

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HRO rating: 9/10

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Lizzy’s Homemade Ice Cream (5/10)

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{shortcode-cf12b4bc7931f361bc583154289ee3aa83b52e5b}

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Great for: hometown vibes, finding ads for local tutors, avoiding stomach aches if you have to run a marathon afterward.

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{shortcode-a11531d9242fc85afb32b0d17474aa0f10de9194}

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Spirits were high as we arrived at Lizzy’s ice cream. Our glasses fogged up in the warm interior, and we had the tiny place to ourselves as we tested out the recommended Butter Crunch (d) and Mint Chip (v) while standing at a side counter and discussing the flavors in hushed tones. This was ESJ’s first time trying Lizzy’s in four years at Harvard, and expectations set by friends was high. But we were disappointed. Maybe we caught them on a bad day.

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Butter Crunch (d): This flavor is described as “butter almond toffee pieces in a rich buttery base.” The toffee was either great or not great, depending on who you ask, but we agreed that the base was actually not too rich for mass consumption. The ice cream, though creamy, was very melty and we had a little crisis about it. But that just showed how homemade the homemade ice cream really was!

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ESJ rating: 7/10

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HRO rating: 4/10

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Mint Chip (v): A mint chip hater and lover agreed: it’s giving toothpaste, just a bit. It had the trademark non-dairy aftertaste and not a lot of chocolate chips. Not an ideal situation.

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ESJ rating: 6/10

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HRO rating: 3/10

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Taiyaki (4.5/10)

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{shortcode-ec421d10dbefa06fd6978d1e0e58dc4c8bfb8f6d}

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Great for: the Instagram story, Asian-flavor lovers.

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Our stomachs were now gradually making that mind-body connection that we were eating way more sugar at night than we probably should. After trying an insistent sample of the hojicha, we paid a hefty $9 for the “Straight Outta Japan” (hojicha and matcha swirl ice cream with a red bean base). Don’t worry, we got an Instagram-worthy picture to make up for the money we spent. Our first location with no non-dairy option!

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Straight Outta Japan (d): The ice cream was less sweet than the other flavors we tried that night, which was a welcome delight, but overall there was very little variety in flavors available. Also, we got tired of the ice cream pretty quickly, though we urge you to take that with a grain of salt because we were slowly feeling the intestinal consequences of our lofty mission. The Taiyaki cone was a bit stale because it wasn’t fresh, but we suspect it was just because we visited during a slow hour. Overall, it’s a place that you probably don’t need to come back to after you got one good pic for the ’gram.

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ESJ rating: 4/10

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HRO rating: 5/10

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Ben and Jerry’s (5.25/10)

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{shortcode-9ef70b352f4add4cd9be9dbf8a3a536f20735501}

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Great for: interestingly named flavors, an option close to the river.

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Not great for: your wallet.

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{shortcode-6b4196ad7e97109b2cb2910f578eb1f22c90e43f}

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We were feeling a little better as we walked off some of the sugar during the trek from Taiyaki to Ben and Jerry’s. That good feeling quickly turned to shock when we realized that Ben and Jerry’s charges $8 for a small cup. We quietly hoped that the taste would justify the high price point. After obtaining our recommended scoops of The Tonight Dough (d) and Change the Whirled (v), we huddled in a corner near the exit to taste test.

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The Tonight Dough (d): A very classic flavor when you think about Ben and Jerry’s. Cookie dough is always a great option, but it was nothing revolutionary — certainly not worth $8. We recommend going down the street to any supermarket and getting a pint of cookie dough ice cream there instead.

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ESJ rating: : 4/10

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HRO rating: 5/10

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Change The Whirled (v): We’ve been noticing a considerable amount of stretchiness (xanthan gum?) in many of our non-dairy options, and this was no exception. Again, nothing revolutionary and tastes noticeably of oat milk. We don’t see a reason you would go out of your way to get this scoop (unless you are also pursuing a comprehensive ranking of ice cream in the Square), but not a bad pick-me-up for the middle of finals.

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ESJ rating: 6/10

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HRO rating: 6/10

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Amorino (8.25/10)

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{shortcode-278560bc13c85a7046fb2001ee4fd6e21ba154ae}

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Great for: a date night (a lot of seating)

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{shortcode-b23aa7fbaa5ac448a6862c396c9318b788e607fb}

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Onto our third to last spot! An air of romance permeated through the air as we entered Amorino, known for its rose-shaped gelato cones. After Ben and Jerry’s, the prices were looking mighty fine, and a readily available gender-neutral bathroom and drinking water was a pleasant plus to the whole atmosphere. We armed ourselves with the pistachio (d) (ESJ’s favorite flavor) and mango sorbet (v). After a series of chocolate and caramel flavors, this was a great way to get some fiber into our bodies.

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Pistachio (d): So. So. Creamy. The unassuming scoop packs a punch of flavor, but is also decadent and light. Our eyes widened. Our taste buds were happy.

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ESJ rating: 9/10

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HRO rating: 8/10

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Mango Sorbet (v): Two syllables. MAN. GO. The flavor was so fresh and transported us back to summer when everything was better and the world wasn’t so complicated.

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ESJ rating: 8/10

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HRO rating: 8/10

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{shortcode-aca1ac269ba15726e5b85c6491411b3767b00498}

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J.P. Licks (8.4/10)

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{shortcode-fe9f8391c938be7122174b562cc3e48be57d6c2b}

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Great for: bringing your family and visiting friends, getting a classic taste of Massachusetts.

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{shortcode-97716864e50b255bb0c15004aaa39d09efd4ad2e}

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Expectations were high and spirits rose, especially for ESJ who claims J.P. Licks as a place of childhood memory. Located in a central location within the Square, J.P. Licks is notably popular among tourists and tutors organizing study breaks. We found a table to sit down with our scoops of Brownie Brownie Batter (d) and Peanut Butter Chip (v) and dug in.

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Brownie Brownie Batter (d): A creamy, delightful spoonful of chocolate, as advertised. This flavor is ESJ’s childhood favorite, which brought back warm nostalgia for her and a newfound appreciation for HRO.

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ESJ rating: 9/10

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HRO rating: 8/10

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Peanut Butter Chip (v): The ice cream enthusiast behind the counter informed us that all of the non-dairy scoops had a coconut base, and they certainly weren’t kidding. The peanut butter compliments the coconut beautifully to create a refreshing mix. However, it lost points because the chocolate chips were not chocolatey, and didn’t add anything to the ice cream other than a different texture every now and then.

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ESJ rating: 8/10

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HRO rating: 8.5/10

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{shortcode-b679db7ab8da9ad9d2954201b8b1dc6c90e76f90}

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Berryline (3.4/10)

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{shortcode-142960d83f3f8e038ea5af201b28c33a7b90d88e}

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Great for: A pick-me-up, late-night bite

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{shortcode-b61347d696da5eeba4e1540b95a9443db34964d6}

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You only really come to Berryline on two occasions: when you’re in the trenches or when you’re getting to know someone for the first time, so you say “I know a place.” We had both only come here for the froyo, so we were curious to see if the ice cream could be good as well. The price was pretty cheap (we were still traumatized from Ben and Jerry’s). For a Monday evening, the place was packed, so we took our cookies and cream (d) and mango (v) to the outside seating.

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Cookies and Cream (d): They should’ve just called it Cookie because we didn’t get the cream part in any of those bites. The ice cream was pretty tasteless and the cookies didn’t really taste like Oreos either. If we came to Berryline for a sweet treat and unassumingly got this, we would certainly be upset.

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ESJ rating: 2/10

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HRO rating: 1/10

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Mango (v): Icier and sweeter than the mango sorbet we tried at Amorino’s. It left a certain residue on our tongues and was pretty good but not amazing. We’d also like to note that the person serving us had tried to politely tell us that the non-dairy ice cream was better. She was very correct.

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ESJ rating: 5/10

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HRO rating: 5.5/10

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The Final Ranking

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1. JP Licks (8.4/10)

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2. \u200b\u200bVan Leeuwen (8.25/10)

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3. Amorino (8.25/10)

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4. Ben and Jerry’s (5.25/10)

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5. Lizzy’s Homemade Ice Cream (5/10)

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6. Taiyaki (4.5/10)

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7. Berryline (3.4/10)

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{shortcode-58f736fe5a7961b9678ac83d6d98ea542203be01}

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{shortcode-39b96835c228a683fda46db8009f8da672e9a890}

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We both went home with full stomachs, two cups of ice cream each, and the conclusion that we’ll probably stay away from ice cream for the next two business weeks. You’re so welcome that we provided this comprehensive list of ice cream places for your next date, parents’ visit, or sweet treat.

', [ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-92c20c9cb2b6c1f7506cad912e2b62c9119d23b0}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/014652_1375354.jpg.1500x1125_q95_crop-smart_upscale.jpg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='large', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption=None, hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-001a5105674a935e280cee402a978f84e1a6149c}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/013347_1375346.jpg.1125x1500_q95_crop-smart_upscale.jpg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='The start of our ice cream journey!', hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-05aa48e00beb3ab5997fa215201944ea9d0ee3f7}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/013536_1375347.jpg.1500x1125_q95_crop-smart_upscale.jpg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='First stop: Van Leeuwen', hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-d6d542f64e51b876a03274ffba63c86ce0871fc0}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/013715_1375348.jpg.1500x1125_q95_crop-smart_upscale.jpg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='Eating Van Leeuwen', hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-cf12b4bc7931f361bc583154289ee3aa83b52e5b}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/media.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/014023_1375349.jpeg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption="Second stop: Lizzy's", hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-a11531d9242fc85afb32b0d17474aa0f10de9194}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/media.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/014055_1375350.jpeg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption="Eating Lizzy's", hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-ec421d10dbefa06fd6978d1e0e58dc4c8bfb8f6d}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/media.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/014253_1375351.jpeg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='Third stop: Taiyaki… yum, fish ', hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-9ef70b352f4add4cd9be9dbf8a3a536f20735501}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/014416_1375352.jpg.1500x1125_q95_crop-smart_upscale.jpg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption="Fourth stop: Ben and Jerry's", hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-6b4196ad7e97109b2cb2910f578eb1f22c90e43f}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/014450_1375353.jpg.1500x1125_q95_crop-smart_upscale.jpg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='Wow, another scoop of ice cream!', hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-278560bc13c85a7046fb2001ee4fd6e21ba154ae}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/014652_1375354.jpg.1500x1125_q95_crop-smart_upscale.jpg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='Wide selection of flavors here', hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-b23aa7fbaa5ac448a6862c396c9318b788e607fb}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/media.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/014745_1375355.jpeg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='HRO is smiling, but not on the inside', hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-aca1ac269ba15726e5b85c6491411b3767b00498}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/media.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/014909_1375356.jpeg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='Heavily reconsidering our choices to eat this much ice cream in one night.', hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-fe9f8391c938be7122174b562cc3e48be57d6c2b}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/015050_1375357.jpg.1500x1125_q95_crop-smart_upscale.jpg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='J.P. Licks… how many stops has it been?', hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-97716864e50b255bb0c15004aaa39d09efd4ad2e}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/015133_1375358.jpg.1500x1125_q95_crop-smart_upscale.jpg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='So excited to return to childhood.', hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-b679db7ab8da9ad9d2954201b8b1dc6c90e76f90}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/media.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/015301_1375359.jpeg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption="Our growing collection of ice cream cups in HRO's bag", hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-142960d83f3f8e038ea5af201b28c33a7b90d88e}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/015358_1375360.jpg.1500x1125_q95_crop-smart_upscale.jpg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='Last stop!! Berryline.', hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-b61347d696da5eeba4e1540b95a9443db34964d6}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/media.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/015456_1375361.jpeg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='Moments before disaster', hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-58f736fe5a7961b9678ac83d6d98ea542203be01}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/015635_1375362.jpg.1500x1125_q95_crop-smart_upscale.jpg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='Genuine relief that we survived this..', hovertext=None, contributors=]>), ShortcodeImageGQL(key='{shortcode-39b96835c228a683fda46db8009f8da672e9a890}', image_url='https://s3.amazonaws.com/thumbnails.thecrimson.com/photos/2024/12/04/015709_1375363.jpg.1500x1125_q95_crop-smart_upscale.jpg', nofilm=False, pos='center', size='medium', byline=True, quote=False, quotebyline=False, theme='light', caption='Our ice cream collection… SOS = Save Our Stomachs.', hovertext=None, contributors=]>)])

What to Buy Your Pre-Med Friend for the Holidays

('

{shortcode-bed7d5c42be6b553237bb5dcbd0cf0c911843ec1}The holidays are upon us, and with them the yearly dilemma of what to buy your loved ones for the holidays. You want a gift that shows your love but is also useful. Don’t worry, Flyby can help you out with that. Here are some gift ideas for the very stressed pre-med in your life, broken down by class year.

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Freshman

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1. Connect them to a successful life sciences consultant for mentoring. Bonus points if they’re at ClearView or Trinity.

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2. An LSAT book.

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3. Stock Trader’s Almanac 2025 (Almanac Investor Series)

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Because let’s be honest, your friend is most likely going to drop pre-med and choose a different soul-crushing career to stress about. LS1A tends to have that effect on people.

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Sophomore

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1. A weighted blanket

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2. A six-month subscription to a therapy service (so that it lasts all semester!)

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3. A Squishmallow

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Orgo and/or physics is crushing your friend’s soul. They would appreciate it if you could help return a little bit of joy to their lives.

\r\n\r\n

Junior

\r\n\r\n

1. A giant YouTube playlist of study motivation

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2. Spotify or Apple Music subscription (for those who like music while studying)

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3. Noise-canceling headphones

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(FYI, your friend is supposed to be studying for the MCAT right now and is not, in fact, studying for the MCAT. Help them out, would you?)

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Senior

\r\n\r\n

1. A planner (for when the senioritis hits).

\r\n\r\n

2. A fun keyboard mat that matches their aesthetic (for your pre-med friend who is typing a thesis for whatever reason)

\r\n\r\n

3. A couple of nearby hotel rooms for graduation (because they definitely forgot to book a room for their families)

\r\n\r\n

Your senior friend is mentally checked out and dreaming of their white coat ceremony and might need to be snapped back to reality. But hey, at least they made it!

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Gap Year

\r\n\r\n

1. A winning lottery ticket.

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2. A time machine that can take your friend back to the ‘80’s to buy Apple stocks.

\r\n\r\n

3. A check for $1 million.

\r\n\r\n

Between gap year expenses, medical school application fees, and the looming specter of medical school debt, your friend on a gap year desperately needs money.

\r\n\r\n

We hope this list was useful for you! You have our permission to copy and paste these items into Amazon — you don’t even need to credit us when the pre-med in your life is crying tears of joy. You’re welcome. ;)

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The "I'm Not Tired" Challenge (Impossible)

('

{shortcode-3b3d7d7a704aac81fbb41cbf9b5b2219018fde51}

\r\n\r\n

Between daylight savings making the Yard pitch black by 4:30 p.m. and the endless stream of midterms and assignments, it feels like most of us are running on fumes. Tired of every conversation in the dhall circling back to our collective exhaustion, I challenged myself to go one whole day without uttering the phrase “I’m tired.” Spoiler: I failed spectacularly (it took me five minutes after waking up).

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Anyways, here’s your guide to gaslighting yourself and your body that you’re actually thriving and super well-rested!

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Time Your REM Cycle

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Newton’s laws might be haunting you in Physics 16, but they’re onto something about bodies at rest staying at rest. Why is it so easy to stay awake until 6 a.m. but so hard to wake up at 6 a.m.? I’m somehow able to stay up super late, but I’m unable to ever wake up early enough to get to my 10:30 a.m. section on time. Without multiple forces acting on you (your alarm, a kind roommate waking you up, or the screaming children from the preschool across the street), getting out of bed can feel like an impossible feat.

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Pro tip: Use a REM sleep cycle calculator to figure out when to set your alarm. When you wake up during deeper stages of sleep, like REM sleep, you’ll feel more groggy as you go throughout the day. However, when you wake up at the end of a REM sleep cycle, which is when sleep is lightest, this can help you feel more rested and ready to start the day. Bonus, if you have a smartwatch, some of them are even able to figure out when you are at your lightest stage of sleep based on your heart rate and other metrics, and your alarm will go off then accordingly.

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Curate Your Wake-Up Playlist

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When the struggle to leave your blanket cocoon is real, blast some uptempo music to hype yourself up. Personal favorites include Chappell Roan’s “Super Graphic Ultra Modern Girl,” “Feminomenon,” and “HOT TO GO!” to force me to get out of bed. Alternatively, you could just wake up to your pregame mix.

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Vitamin C: Your New Best Friend

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Forget your daily Veritaffle — Vitamin C is the real MVP, especially when the Cambridge winter has you questioning your college and life choices. Keep those supplements handy for an energy boost that doesn’t require making the trek to Blank Street.

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Secure Breakfast

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While I’ve only managed to catch breakfast a total of three times this semester, I’m here to tell you that breakfast is worth setting that alarm for. You’ll feel so much better throughout the day because your brain has been nourished, and breakfast is the most important meal of the day (cliché, but true). And even if you can’t make it to breakfast, grabbing a sweet treat like an almond croissant at some point throughout the day still counts (at least that’s what I tell myself).

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The Nuclear Option: The All-Nighter Reset

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PSA: Don’t make this a habit, or your circadian rhythm will actually crash out. But sometimes, pulling an all-nighter and embracing your inner Lamonster is the only way to really reset and regain a functional sleep schedule. Down an energy drink to make it through the day and then go to bed by 11 p.m. the next day. It’s like turning a computer on and off, but it’s actually your sleep schedule and sanity. While I’m not the biggest proponent of caffeine or energy drinks, desperate times call for desperate measures.

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We’re in the home stretch! Thanksgiving break is so close, and winter break isn’t far behind. And even if the sun has set by your 4 p.m. section, together, we’ve got this.

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This writer is currently surviving on nothing but sweet treats and sheer willpower.

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What Harvard Students Are Actually Thankful for This Thanksgiving

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As the leaves fall and HUDS rolls out the pumpkin pie, we’re reflecting on the little things that make Harvard life just a bit sweeter. Grab a plate, pass the gratitude, and let’s dig in.

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HUDS cookies

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HUDS cookies may not be warm or particularly fresh, and, yes, they kind of taste like cardboard — but they’re always there for you. When the menu says “fresh local catch” and you’re not feeling adventurous, those slightly-stale, always-dependable cookies are a safe harbor. In a world of academic and culinary uncertainty, their unchanging mediocrity is strangely comforting.

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Brain Break

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Brain Break: the magical time when Harvard students can put aside their worries and focus on what really matters: free snacks. Whether it’s grabbing a handful of pretzels or forming lifelong friendships over a shared plate of hummus, Brain Break is a much needed pause from essays and psets. It’s a moment to recharge, then wonder how a 10-minute pause can somehow last an hour.

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Flexing on family members

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Thanksgiving is the Super Bowl of flexing for Harvard students — it’s the prime time to remind everyone you’re not the family disappointment. Nobody at the table knows what “Michael Sandel’s critique of meritocracy” actually means, but the nods of approval are what really matter.

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Tourists

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If you really think about it, Harvard students should be thankful for tourists — those fearless fans who treat campus like a movie set and turn every student into an accidental celebrity. Walking down the Widener steps can feel like strutting down the red carpet as cameras click away. They might think you’re a future president (at least they don’t know you’re just someone heading to EC10). For a brief moment, you’re the star of their Harvard fantasy, and honestly, who doesn’t love a little ego boost between midterms?

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No questions asked extension days

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Professors don’t always offer extension days, but when they do, they’re the academic equivalent of a Thanksgiving miracle. It’s always such a relief to check the syllabus and find out you have three extra days to do anything besides your work. No explanations required, no guilt trips, just a quiet acknowledgement that life happens. These rare gems of mercy allow students to breathe a little easier, even if that extra day is spent binge-watching a show “to clear the mind.”

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Office hours that turn into life advice sessions

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Every student has that one professor who turns office hours into a cross between a therapy session and a TED Talk. You go in to ask about a term paper but leave with insights on everything from career choices to the meaning of life. Sure, the paper’s still due tomorrow, but at least you’ve been reminded that your GPA doesn’t define your self-worth.

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So, this Thanksgiving, let’s raise a glass to the things that make Harvard more than just a campus. Whether it’s finding comfort in the unremarkable or flexing your academic superiority in front of relatives who still think “psets” are a typo, these are the moments that remind us why we’re here. And if all else fails, at least there’s always an extension day on the horizon.

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Flyby's Review of the Yale Bulldog Roast

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As a senior and a former LS1b student, I was both intrigued and excited to finally witness the Yale Bulldog Roast. I will admit from the get-go that I did in fact think that the entire two hours would be filled with Andrew Berry making school-appropriate snarky comments on the Yalies, which I wasn’t particularly opposed to, but a little curious about how one could have that much to say about a school located in New Haven. Upon my arrival, I was incredibly pleasantly surprised to see there was a jam-packed program of student performances in addition to Berry, who was to headline the actual roast session. Was the trek to Sanders Theatre rainy and cold? Yes. Did I have piles of work to finish before the big game? Also yes. But hey, nothing warms the soul quite like some quality roasts — except maybe actually finishing my assignments, which, spoiler alert, did not happen.

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The Marching Band

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To kick off the event, they started right at 7 p.m. At a school where Harvard time is a little too normalized (I’m speaking my truth), it was refreshing that the band was so punctual. I’ve never really had the opportunity to watch a marching band perform due to the lack of school spirit in my high school, so I didn’t really know what to expect. The heavy brass and percussion, the grandeur movements, and the continuous melody filled my pset-hardened heart with a school spirit I had not felt before. I just really wish there was a program because I didn’t recognize the songs :( The cherry on top was when they started singing — multitasking kings and queens.

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Side note: After the wonderful marching band performance, they finally played the spiel about locating the nearest exit in case of an emergency… but what if there was an emergency before then?

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THUD

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I don’t think I’d ever heard of The Harvard Undergraduate Drummers (THUD) before but they quickly became my favorite performance of the night. Not only did they prove the versatility of a Home Depot bucket, but also they genuinely produced the most coordinated and elaborate drumming performance I’ve ever seen. It was honestly heartwarming because it felt like the group was genuinely there to have fun and share their passion for percussion. I went in expecting to hate on the Yalies and came out a THUD fan.

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The Radcliffe Choral Society and The Harvard Glee Club

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As a former chorus kid, I was very partial to this joint effort between the Radcliffe Choral Society and The Harvard Glee Club to culture the rest of us who, I’m willing to bet, did not know Harvard had so many school songs. The altos KILLED IT. As a fellow alto, I was proud to hear y’all loud and clear. My only wish was that they showed the lyrics on screen so that we could’ve showed up and showed out at the game.

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AADT

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As always, AADT ate. LOVED the performance, no notes, literally on my knees because they are so hot — I can only hope that one day I will have the level of coordination to be able to dance like that. My one confusion, however, was the color of the outfits. I couldn’t help but notice that they were repping the opps? Perhaps it was an unintentional fashion statement or a way to express good sportsmanship. Either way, I can forgive them due to their jaw-dropping moves.

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HCSUCS

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I, for one, am a big fan of both stand-up comedy and the acronym HCSUCS. I thought the Rick cardboard cutout was a nice touch. I also appreciated the level of prep that went into each of the sets. To the comedian who stood up their Yale interviewer… You are so brave, and I wish to have that confidence one day. Perhaps I will finally have the guts to stand up one of my lectures.

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Andrew Berry

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Now, the star of the show was really Berry’s roast. Despite initial technical difficulties (I was convinced it was part of the bit and Berry was going to announce, “Now you know what it’s like to sit through a Yale lecture”), Berry pulled out his incredibly well-put-together slideshow (cue flashbacks to LS1b). Not only was his set actually really informative (i.e., we beat Yale in basically every aspect: inbreeding in bulldogs, college rankings, projected income), but Berry also aired out all of Yale’s dirty laundry. The fact that Yalies treat their laundry machines like toilets made me feel a little better about one of our own traditions. If I’m being honest, I came into this with high hopes but low expectations, and my socks were kinda knocked off.

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If you have never been to the Yale Bulldog Roast, I highly recommend going at least once if you have the chance (crying in senior). Albeit, I think most of the audience were freshmen, it was a cool way to see student performances and a great way to get into the school spirit. I know the game has passed, but Harvard-Yale really extends beyond a football game. It’s a mindset and a lifestyle. We’ll get ’em next year (knock on wood), and maybe the win is the enemies we made along the way.

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Flyby Tries: Intellectual Vitality at the H-Y Game

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There are many obvious reasons that Harvard is better than Yale, but here’s one we don’t talk about enough: Harvard has “intellectual vitality.” As far as Google will tell me, this is a term only used at Harvard and sort-of Stanford (along with in the college admissions “how genuinely curious about the world is this 17-year-old” sense). So, I figured even if we didn’t win the game (which we obviously didn’t), I could win on the front of intellectual vitality during the fateful Saturday. I prepared some questions and set off in search of both practicing intellectual vitality and figuring out what it actually is.

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The Pregame

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I started off at my roommate’s pregame, which was full of guys who are friends with him but I barely know. This was the perfect opportunity to ask some of my intellectually vital questions!

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“What is the greatest issue facing our generation?” I asked.

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“Skibidi Toilet,” said one guy I didn’t know. We weren’t off to a great start.

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A Yalie who had somehow gotten in said the biggest issue was apathy and a lack of tolerance for diverging viewpoints. Sounds like this guy’s been at Harvard for longer than one night — or at least read some op-eds published in The Crimson!

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Then I asked about the trolley problem, with one Harvard student on one track and three Yale students on the other. My roommate said to run over the Yale students and then come back for the Harvard student, to make sure it’s equal. Everyone else agreed. This struck me as very intellectually vital. We had established that one Harvard student is worth three Yale students.

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I asked the room what they thought intellectual vitality actually was. “Not this,” one guy said. I was discouraged. If this wasn’t intellectual vitality, what was I supposed to do? I decided to channel the Harvard spirit and change nothing about how I would operate for the rest of the day. I couldn’t change my methodology, so I had to change my sample.

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The Tailgate

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I went to the unofficial tailgate, but it seemed like people were too busy playing pong to decide what the most pressing issue of our generation was. So I collected my official drink tickets, armed myself with an Angry Orchard, and found my friend’s blocking group.

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I asked one of them what the most pressing issue of our generation was. She said it was a lack of information. This was going better!

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Then I asked about the trolley problem. She said, “Kill all Yalies.” Ok, maybe a bit less intellectually vital.

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I came up with a new question: is it possible for a Harvard-Yale relationship to survive? Someone else in my friend’s blocking group said that it was, if only the Yalie gave up their morals. I was shocked to learn that Yalies have morals. I could feel the vitality in my intellect increasing.

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Then we all chugged White Claws and got ready to enter the stadium.

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The Game

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I must confess that I forgot about intellectual vitality during the first half of the game. I was too busy mourning our score. But during halftime, whatever the marching bands had going on reminded me of my task. Maybe I hadn’t been random enough in my sample, and that was why I wasn’t getting to the bottom of what intellectual vitality actually is.

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I turned to the random people in the stands behind me, explained my mission, and asked them about the most pressing issue of our generation.

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“Kink shaming.” Confusing, but interesting. I couldn’t hold myself back from asking my real question:

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“What actually is intellectual vitality?”

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“Learning to accept people, including their kinks.” Somehow, that didn’t seem right.

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The person sitting next to them said, “It’s using your head.” I couldn’t tell if that was related to the kink thing. Then the game started again, and I watched our painful defeat.

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The End of the Game

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In the fourth quarter, I felt dismayed. We were going to lose the game, and I didn’t even learn anything about intellectual vitality. I had had no opportunities to confront diverging viewpoints and show how OK I was with them. I had only met one person who seemed more conservative than me, and he was from Yale! Maybe I should have argued more with the kink guy, I thought. But was it more intellectually vital to consider seriously that kink shaming was the greatest issue of our generation? Or Skibidi Toilet?

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But, suddenly, like an angel descending from intellectual vitality heaven, I saw a large plastic bag floating through the air near the Harvard student section. It danced through the sky above the field before settling in the seats just behind the end zone. It reminded me: intellectual vitality, like a plastic bag drifting through the wind wanting to start again, is about the journey, not the destination. I had held space for my own intellectual vitality even on one of the most raucous days of the Harvard year. If I discovered what the elusive term “intellectual vitality” actually meant, rather than trying to understand it based on the actual non-Harvard definitions of those words, then my journey would be over.

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Maybe I’ll never know what intellectual vitality actually is or whether it was worth practicing at a football game just to write a silly article that hopefully somebody is reading. But if I know one thing about intellectual vitality, it’s this: Yale will NEVER do it as well as we do.

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Flyby Tries: Recreating Dean Khurana’s Harvard-Yale Photos

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{shortcode-4614d5c3e10276d1e77df874fcecc6f39a69b343}It’s no secret that Harvard is a world renowned institution. We have Nobel Prize-winning professors, Rhodes Scholars for peers, and students who will go on to cure cancer… or go into finance. But what most of the outside world does not know is that we have another iconic campus celebrity: Dean of the College Rakesh Khurana.

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As dean, Khurana is in charge of fostering community among undergraduates and promoting a free exchange of ideas on campus through the Intellectual Vitality Initiative he spearheaded. More importantly, however, he is in charge of every Harvard student’s favorite Instagram page (@deankhurana). Getting a selfie with Khurana is, at this point, the fourth College tradition. So what better way to honor our beloved dean before he steps down later this year than to recreate some of his most iconic Harvard-Yale photos!

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No Introduction Needed

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You’ve all seen this photo from last year’s Harvard-Yale game. After all, it’s the fourth most upvoted Sidechat post of all time, and if you’re anything like me, this is the first picture that you envision when you think of Harvard-Yale. It perfectly captures the average student’s zeal for life and for doing ridiculous things “for the plot.”

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It’s this mindset that inspired me to write this article, regardless of the embarrassment I knew I would feel in the moment while mimicking Khurana’s pose in the middle of campus. All I could do as I knelt on the grass with my Sasha and Heidi (Yale’s Sasha dupe) substitutes (see: my penguin and elephant stuffed animals) is remind myself that if Khurana could do this pose and feel confident in posting it, I could too. I think this is a mindset that we could all benefit from during the last weeks of 2024. But, hey, no judgment if you choose not to recreate this photo – that’s what you have me for!

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Enemies to Lovers

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Love knows no bounds – it traverses the 134-mile distance between New Haven and Cambridge. As much as Harvard students love to feed into the Y*le hatred, we make sure to put aside our differences during the Game. It’s only natural that Khurana and Dean of Yale College Pericles Lewis do the same. (Sidenote: it’s important to note that Khurana has 22,600 Instagram followers, whereas Lewis has 4,523… not that I mean to suggest any one school or Dean is better.)

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Pictured above is a photo of Khurana and Lewis embracing in their best Yale merch following Yale’s win last year. Although Khurana was roped into repping our rival school because of Harvard’s loss, he did so graciously and with his signature smile. In the face of defeat, Khurana stood as a beacon of light and hope.

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These upstanding characteristics are what drew me to the second photo I decided to recreate. Since I do not have Yale merch, nor do any of my friends, for obvious reasons, I quickly improvised by printing out their University logo and taping it onto my bluest of blue sweatshirts. All I needed then was my own Lewis, which I quickly procured by forcing one of my suitemates to pose with me. #community #love #HarvardYaleuniteseveryone

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Lewis pt. 2

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As my night of costume changes grew longer, my suitemate grew tired and I had to swap her out with my backup Lewis: Son Heung-Min. Ok, that’s kind of clickbait – it’s him but in plushie version (see above). Once I printed out a smaller Yale logo to tape over his soccer jersey number and found a miscellaneous lanyard to hang around his neck to make him seem more lifelike, all I had to do was figure out Khurana’s signature selfie tilt.

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Although this sounds easy in theory, Khurana’s photos defy all laws of nature and are tilted at an angle I could not quite figure out, even after many, many failed attempts. I kept tilting my phone too far left or too far right, and too low or too high up. After sifting through 30 photos and hating every single one, I found the one. It’s still not at a perfect angle, but it’s the best that I could do. And hey, it got Heung-Min’s stamp of approval so that’s all that matters.

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Undergraduate Joy

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Yup, even though I had so much difficulty with perfecting Khurana’s tilt in the previous recreation, I decided to choose yet another slanted selfie. This time, however, my biggest challenge was not tilting my phone at the right angle; it was finding four willing participants to join me in my selfie.

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After canvassing my suite and being faced with empty room after empty room, I had to improvise. Luckily, since my common room is full of more pillows and plushies than one could ever need, I was able to substitute the four smiling undergraduates with the five equally smiley members of One Direction. As for the stadium packed with onlookers, my suite’s ever-growing Polaroid wall of guests – pictured in the background – is as much of a substitute as I could manage at the last minute.

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Civic Duty = Repping Crimson

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Ok, I know this photo of Khurana is not from Harvard-Yale, but it’s too iconic not to include in my recreations. And in a way, this photo’s “vibes” are very Harvard-Yale because of the red and blue of the “I voted” sticker that he is holding. Even in his daily life, Khurana is always proudly repping Crimson.

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This photo quickly went viral among the Harvard community and garnered more likes and shares for Khurana than his average posts. The most probable explanation for this is the hilarious juxtaposition between his extremely grim face and his cheery and hopeful caption of “Exercising my rights.”

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Whatever the reasoning behind the popularity of the post, I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to recreate it with my own “I voted by mail” sticker. With Harvard-Yale coming up, I hope you all exercise your rights and fulfill your civic duty of showing up and showing out at Harvard Stadium to see us beat the Bulldogs. Yuck Fale!

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With Khurana’s tenure coming to an end, it’s bittersweet to think about the end of the beloved Khuranagram. Though we may no longer be digitally captured in the trenches of Cabot Library or looking disheveled as we rush to our 9 a.m. classes, it’s important to remember that his photos will forever live on and leave a legacy of their own. So, if you’re ever feeling down, don’t forget that you can always turn to the photo of him kneeling with Sasha and Heidi to make you smile!

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How to Get Your Own Taylor Swift Travis Kelce Relationship in Time for Harvard-Yale

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{shortcode-0bfd56e68fc6f0c2455a16dee712a0a0df8258fa}With Harvard-Yale just around the corner and cuffing season in full swing, there’s no better time to secure a relationship. However, instead of settling for just any old relationship (based on boring things like love, mutual interests, and chemistry), this H-Y season, aim for the relationship that will get you the most clout. And thanks to this year’s Super Bowl, we don’t have to look far for inspiration. If you’re anything like me and my friends, watching Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce embrace after his iconic win had you thinking: “Wow, maybe I should date an athlete” or “Can I find a hockey boyfriend in time for Beanpot?”.

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Thankfully, Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce’s relationship gives us the blueprint for something even better than a hug after a Super Bowl win: congratulating your partner after winning Harvard-Yale, our very own version of the Super Bowl.

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Step 1: Find a niche

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If you really want to make the most of your clout-seeking relationship, you will need to be successful enough that people are watching you. Because Taylor Swift is a mega-popstar, Grammy award-winning mega-pop star, people are interested in who she is dating and what she is up to. If you want to have a big camera moment of your own at Harvard-Yale moment, you need to make people notice you. Luckily, this is Harvard, so your options are endless. You could join The Crimson and write an investigative piece behind Dean Khurana’s Instagram: “Really Him, or Is There a Publicist Behind it All?”. Or, if you’re feeling up to it, get to the bottom of the transformative experience; this just-in: “Transformative Experience is a Hoax”.

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If writing isn’t your thing, you could always follow in Taylor’s footsteps and join one of the million a cappella groups on campus. If Pitch Perfect has taught us anything, you would not be the first to vocally percuss yourself into a relationship. Or you could join a consulting club like CBE or HCCG and work your way to the top. As a board member, you’ll have the attention of all the compers desperate to join. If you’re funny (or, at the very least, funny for a Harvard student), you can hop on Sidechat and make your way up the leaderboard. Hundreds of thousands of points in karma is a sure way to achieve celebrity status.

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Step 2: Date. A lot.

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Between psets and your Hum 10 readings, it may be difficult to find the time to meet people… but this is an essential part of getting your big moment at Harvard-Yale. Remember quantity over quality, and the messier, the better. So, if you’ve ever had a crush on someone in your pset group or the annoying section kid makes a move, now is your time. Similarly, if you've just been letting your Datamatches go unmatched (c’mon it’s been months), take action. Get your free Berryline (and free content) and get out there!

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Step 3: Your life is your content

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Now that you’ve found your niche, it’s time for your relationship and niche to go hand in hand. Maybe mention your latest date in a riff-off between the Radcliffe Pitches and the Opportunes: bonus points if they’re in the competing club. If you choose consulting as your niche, include an anecdote about newfound trust issues in your weekly slide deck, or better yet, on a call with your client. As a member on the Sidechat leaderboard, you have the perfect opportunity to talk about your ex (or exes, if you’re doing it right) as often as you want. And if you’re a Crimson writer, you’ll have ample opportunities to detail your last relationships, just as long as you subtly work them into your latest article.

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Step 4: Find a partner with a niche very different from yours

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This is the most crucial step. Your partner’s niche must be so different from yours that it leaves people wondering how you even met. Your partner must be equally successful at their chosen activity, preferably football if you want that Harvard-Yale moment. It is imperative that you both embody the same power-couple aesthetic that Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce have, or the cameras might just miss you.

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Step 5: THE GAME

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Now that you have manufactured the perfect relationship, it is time for the 30-second clip to capture all that affection. You’ll ideally attend the game with another successful friend who is also completely uninterested in football. In other words, find your Ice Spice. You’ll convince everyone of your true love by celebrating your partner’s win while your friend wonders why she agreed to come to this. Make sure you drag it out when Harvard inevitably wins the game. Instead of rushing to your partner’s side, let it linger to build suspense. You want people to wonder where you are, just before you appear for that award-winning hug.

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It’s easy to get lost in GenEd readings and forget that a little drama keeps everyone on their toes. So this college football season, block out November in your Google calendar and stir up your own drama.

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Harvard-Yale Cocktails

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{shortcode-6d4d6e9573b4f126a62fe2e3fa44b4eda1c53fed}You heard of Harvard cocktails, but have you heard of Harvard-Yale cocktails? Here are some school-spirited takes on classic cocktails to get you in the Harvard-Yale spirit this weekend. Go Crimson!

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Four Places to Scare Yale Students on Campus

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{shortcode-f1db55a39782dfb8bf557985a54ca85bdbdc48a0}While winning the actual game is one aspect of proving to the Ivy League that Harvard is the best (not that we have to), everyone knows that the real battle at Harvard-Yale is which student section shows the most school pride. Yelling, posters, and tailgates all thrive on a crowd. If you’re hosting Yale students and want to knock your enemies off their game, take them to these four places — it’ll send them Ubering all the way back to New Haven before Saturday morning.

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1. Widener

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This is the first stop on your Harvard tour. It's nonchalant and lowkey, and it’ll give them a false sense of security before going in that will make them even more terrified of the next stops. Show them the main rooms, let them marvel at Harvard’s beauty. Then take them to the stacks. Slowly start to walk around, then quickly run to the elevator without them, and if you can turn the automatic lights off, do it. Leave them behind.

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2. Lamont Basement Bathroom

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Once you have reunited with your Yale student, pretend to be confused — they will believe you, since they have a false superiority complex that they’re smarter than us. Lead them to Lamont basement. Then, pretend to need a bathroom break; enough said.

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3. The Quad

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After scaring the Yalie (for the second time), they’ll need a scenic walk to cool off and explore the beauties of campus. Take that 30 15-minute walk to the Quad. Sit in the lawn chains. Play spikeball with fellow students, and be aggressive. Then, in the middle of playing, run to the shuttle stop and don’t look back. Just like many Harvard students who don’t know how to walk from the Quad to the River, the poor, confused, and hopefully directionally challenged Yale student will have no choice but to embrace the quadded life.

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4. Tasty Basty

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Your final stop of the night is Tasty Basty; it’s never great, and they charge a cover at the door. The sweaty environment full of freshmen, combined with the muscle fatigue and mental strain from the day, will make them so exhausted they have no choice but to retreat to New Haven before The Game.

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If your Yale student somehow sticks around after this transformative Harvard experience, just turn their alarm off in the morning and leave before they wake up. They will probably sleep through the game, but they hopefully won’t miss their shuttle back home. They’ve got a long way to go, and it would be an expensive Uber back, especially combined with their mental failure. Have a safe and fun Harvard-Yale, and bring energy to the game. Roll Crim!

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How to: Host a Yalie

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{shortcode-75aaf34be2f9136d6de8849581b6f16f592ea05f}

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If you offered to host a Yale student on your couch or floor this weekend, you might be a little confused about the proper etiquette. Sure, you’d like to seem like a gracious host — and maybe secure yourself a spot on their floor next year — but this weekend is about rivalry, not manners. You must keep your guest/rival on their toes; your school pride is at stake! If you’re searching frantically for ways to assert your superiority while not descending to overt hostility, we have some ideas to add to your to-do list. (We realize that the pre-HY weekend workload is never light, so sorry, but you’re welcome.)

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Give them a fake curfew.

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If you’re an upperclassman, skip ahead. This particular trick only works if you live in the Yard. (So this isn’t for the Union Dorm folks, either.) As they always do during particularly high-traffic weekends, the gates to the Yard close to all non-HUID folk at some nebulous time after dark. (There’s definitely an official time that they close, but I no longer live in the Yard, so I’ve stopped caring.) Inform your guest that this year’s gate closure has been set obscenely early, and they’ll have no choice but to believe you and skip the nighttime festivities; after all, the sun sets past 4:30 p.m. these days anyway. Alternatively, tell them that they’re free to stay out of the Yard until 2 a.m., and place bets with your friends on whether they’ll make it back to sleep on your floorboards after all.

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Treat them like a princess.

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Not Sleeping Beauty, though. For this weekend, you’ll need to reference “The Princess and the Pea.” Assemble every spare blanket you can muster in a tantalizing display of your generosity and prosperity, but slip your Harvard College pin underneath it all. (With the protective cover on, please! We do not condone stabbing.) Your hostee’s night of sleep will suffer, but they won’t be able to complain without seeming super high-maintenance.

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Let them leave their sleeping bags at home.

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And roll out the red carpet for them instead! By red carpet, we mean your standard-issue Veritas picnic blanket, which (a) has been washed a total of zero to one times, (b) is rather thin, and (c) will force them to dream of the Crimson Wave all night long.

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Express polite interest in their school.

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How’s Handsome Dan? How many Handsome Dans have there been? Why have there been so many Handsome Dans? Do you think that there have ever been multiple Handsome Dans at once? Would you take a photo of me with Handsome Dan? What’s Handsome Dan’s favorite food? What’s his favorite color? Where does Handsome Dan live? Where’s he staying over the weekend? Is he an early bird or a night owl? Do you think he would let me pet him? Who would win in a fight, Handsome Dan or a turkey?

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Sabotage their Game Day apparel.

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This one feels rather mean-spirited, so let’s speak in hypotheticals. Perhaps you’ll guide your guest to the dining hall on the morning of The Game for a questionably delicious breakfast. Maybe you’ll guide them through the lines to gather some sustenance and then to the drink station for some much-needed caffeine. Maybe, just maybe, you’ll start serving yourself a glass of cranberry cocktail only to — oopsie! — fall over and spill it all over their clothes, leaving their Yale blues a bit more Crimson. And then, maybe, they’ll be forced to sit in the Yale student section wearing a mix of red, blue, and purple, looking a little bit like a crazy person, because it will be far too cold to sacrifice a layer…

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Feel free to try all or none of the ideas on this list out on your guest. Just please don’t attribute them to us if your hostee turns from unsuspecting to very suspicious; we’d rather not be accosted by indignant Yalies while we shiver in the stadium this Saturday.

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