This year, America’s two greatest holidays fell on the same weekend. Let’s celebrate while we still can (because a Valentine’s Presidents’ Day Weekend only happens four out of every seven years). As our forefathers so writ and intended, here are some presidential superlatives of an amorous nature. Happy V&P Weekend!

Most likely to write you a Declaration of Infatuation:*
{shortcode-3db4d5aaa285b22981dfbfe93fb494b4a48b1438}
Thomas Jefferson (*if you’re a white, land-owning male)

Most likely to make you walk home in the cold:
{shortcode-dedc6ece6dba9b9e373b34e07a71a60e9ef24852}
Andrew Jackson

Most likely to expire in your bed: 
{shortcode-f93e77e9a462678391809e4ced3bb882bf50e8f1}
William Henry Harrison (died after 31 days in office/not remembered for his stamina)

Most likely to be old, rough, and ready: 
{shortcode-59a949cee4bf5264c762e167cf588476933f88e3}
Zachary Taylor

Most likely to carry a big stick:
{shortcode-145b5722808b700fdcfc167d0947fc19fdbebf19}
Teddy Roosevelt

Most likely to plan a date which will live in infamy:
{shortcode-0c6e78e91e64adaf119d6b68f5c99881faf2c705}
Franklin D. Roosevelt

Most likely to invade your V-Day with his D-Day: 
{shortcode-a8d98150acd71ea7e9b207e5f66b2a16effa0055}
Dwight Eisenhower

Most likely to want to tap that (wire):
{shortcode-6d20ca6dbe3ffc51f9779832dae2bf5ba6ffd8de}
Richard Nixon

Most likely to pull out (of Iraq):
{shortcode-71a2ea7f938834e32ae1fcd8d492b2ada9854bd3}
Barack Obama