It buys even less against the only undefeated team in conference.

Pick: Penn

COLUMBIA AT BROWN

We’re not done with the Columbia Marching Band and the Columbia Marching Band isn’t done with Brown. In Article 8.5 of its constitution, the band states, “Brown is a bunch of stoners, but at least Dan boned the drum major.”

Unfortunately, we don’t think Dan—or Columbia for that matter—will be the one doing the boning this weekend.

Pick: Brown

PRINCETON AT DARTMOUTH

This has absolutely nothing to do with this matchup, but neither do most of the things that we write about here.

The people over at The Dartmouth (a newspaper, we think) are really good at taking quotes out of context and then writing a thousand words on said misquote. One of us (we won’t say who but his name is Troy) wrote a column last week on how this might be the easiest road to the tournament Harvard has had in a while.

The column read, “if I was a betting man, I’d take Harvard to finish with the best record in conference.”

What did The Dartmouth write?

“[T]he article did not mention the Crimson’s shooting struggles, instead arguing that Harvard would ‘finish with the best record in conference’”

We couldn’t care less, honestly. Dartmouth has lost nine in a row, so we’re surprised anyone is taking any interest in that team. But at least include the full quote. Our attornies will be in touch.

Did we mention Dartmouth has lost nine in a row?

Pick: Princeton