“I think I’d start on any FBS team in the country,” he told The Philadelphia Inquirer.
“You’re a futuristic machine sent back to destroy humanity,” I reply.
Preseason pundits projected Watson as a first-team All-American, and I heartily agree. He’s the most explosive player I’ve watched. Good luck to anyone not named Sarah Connor.
Pick: Penn 31, Lehigh 24
LAFAYETTE AT PRINCETON
It’s ironic that “Lafayette” sounds so much like “Laughingstock” because Lafayette is a laughingstock.
Not the school—I’m sure that the classes are enriching and the campus as beautiful as Easton, Penn., can be. No, I’m talking about the football team.
Last week, the Leopards lost 59-0 to Villanova. I couldn’t lose 59-0 if I trotted out 11 preschoolers. Which begs the question: How would Lafayette fare against the local elementary school?
Princeton students are not six years old. They’ve already learned advanced topics like multiplication and apostrophes. On Saturday, the Tigers will scratch out the Leopards. After all, Princeton boasts a terminator of its own—senior quarterback John Lovett, who led the FCS with 20 rushing touchdowns last year. He may score 20 more this weekend.
Pick: Princeton 45, Lafayette 7
BROWN AT HARVARD
Rhode Island is home to several historic sites, including the nation’s first circus (1774) and oldest suspended-horse carousel (1876). However, nothing compares to the monstrosity that flanks Interstate 95.
Near Providence, R.I., visitors can admire the world’s largest bug. It’s a blue termite made of fiberglass and steel that stretches 58 feet. Locals call it “Big Blue Bug.” I’m not kidding.
On Saturday, Brown football will battle Big Blue Bug for the world title. Visiting a reeling Harvard team, the Bears will moonlight as the world’s largest pest.
Last year, Brown stomached a 32-22 defeat. In 2017, though, the Bears are riding a 28-23 win over Bryant. The victory came despite the Bulldogs gaining 485 yards versus 312 for Brown.
The Bears may seem like a trendy upset pick. I say otherwise. Harvard knows how to deal with gnats.
Pick: Harvard 30, Brown 13
—Staff writer Sam Danello can be reached at sam.danello@thecrimson.com.