5. Harvard Guerrilla Art Initiative

This group would bring some much-needed creativity and self-expression back to Harvard’s bathroom stalls. It could perhaps be founded by someone in Adams.

4. John Cage Orchestra

Mozart and Bach get their own musical groups on campus, so why not this twentieth century visionary? Primary club responsibilities including staging an annual performance of 4’33’’. No auditions (or even basic musical experience) necessary!

3. Harvard Bagpipers Association

Think how much less boring Convocation and Commencement would be if there were tartan-clad students entertaining us with sweet Highland aires.

2. Harvard Dadaist Society

For those of you who have ever thought to yourselves: “If I put this HUDS tray in the Sackler, is it art?”, this is the club for you.

1. Harvard Topiary Society

Imagine if budget cuts forced the Office for the Arts and the Office of Sustainability to merge; we could have giant, creatively-trimmed shrubbery in the shape of Drew Faust! Think of the possibilities!

—Clio C. Smurro is an incoming Campus Arts editor. Over Thanksgiving break, she made several shell bouquets.