Boston Red Sox shortstop will conduct a seminar on how to speak with reporters by forming English sentences while simultaneously saying nothing. Garciaparra has mastered the art of “boredom” in media interviews and will explore the development of such phrases as “I just go out there and compete” and “we’re gonna give it 110 percent.” Students will be required to watch Bull Durham and must conduct three tape-recorded interviews with Harvard Crimson reporters to illustrate their progressing skills. At the end of the term, there will be a one-on-one oral exam with Professor Garciaparra for fifty minutes—those who do not fall asleep will earn an A for the course. Class will end sharply at five o’clock on game days to allow the professor to maintain his nighttime occupation.

Government 2107. Capitalism Gone Wrong: Major League Baseball

Professors: Billy Beane and Brian Cashman; Th 2-4

Oakland Athletics general manager Billy Beane and New York Yankees GM Brian Cashman will attempt to give a balanced lecture on the nature of capitalism today in Major League Baseball. Topics such as revenue sharing, television markets, fan attendance, marketing and stadiums will be discussed. Students will be required to write an end-of-term research paper on what improvements, if any, should be made to the current collective bargaining agreement. Is it fair that a team with a $200 million payroll can compete in the same league as a team with a $40 million payroll? Are the Yankees actually the “Evil Empire?” Karl Marx’s Communist Manifesto, Adam Smith’s The Wealth of Nations and Rickey Henderson’s Off Base, Confessions of a Thief are required reading.

—Staff writer Alex M. Sherman can be reached at sherman@fas.harvard.edu.