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Note: This Flyby Tries™ article was written during the 2021-2022 Academic Year. In an effort to preserve the authenticity of the authors’ experience, it still reads in the present tense.

Raymond and Annette are two students who are taking multiple p-set classes. As a result, they spend most of their time grueling over their homework at Cabot Library. In fact, they probably spend more time at Cabot than they do in their own dorms. One day, they had a groundbreaking idea to hold a Sleepover in Cabot because… why not? They were young, naive, and excited to make memories in their dorm away from dorm.

Here’s a rough timeline of what happened:

10:00 p.m. - Raymond and Annette arrive at Cabot, starting to regret their decision and feeling a little like their souls have been sucked out of their bodies. They have their room (LL06) booked from 11 p.m. to 2 a.m. so they currently are camping out on the very colorful sofas, holding their pillows and sleeping bag and looking very stupid in their pajamas.

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11:00 p.m. - They are finally in their room. They had a few close calls with both of them almost falling asleep but are determined to persevere until at least 1 a.m. so they can have a proper sleepover. They also had to kick two guys who had been using the room out. Sorry!

Raymond and Annette also find this mess on one of the chairs. To this day, they still do not know what it is. They do not want to know.

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11:17 p.m. - Annette is starving but she has already brushed her teeth and is unable to consume anything other than the freezing cold water from the Cabot library water bottle filling station. She begins to play Christmas music to cope (this endeavor took place in October). Just to add to the ambiance, Raymond begins to play his LS1a learning pod video out loud.

11:37 p.m. - Raymond and Annette’s friend, Jayden E. Personnat ’25, visits and laughs at them. He then proceeds to leave to have a good night’s sleep in the comfort of his own bed. Godspeed.

11:44 p.m. - Raymond finally finishes his LS1A learning pod video. Go, Raymond!

11:52 p.m. - Their other friend (yes, they have more than one friend) Agustín J. León-Sáenz ’25 comes to visit like the supportive friend he is.

12:06 a.m. - Annette and Raymond wonder: Why does Stanford have all the hot people?

12:11 a.m. - “She’s like thawing,” said Agustín referring to Mariah Carey in the weeks leading up to the holidays, of course.

12:26 a.m. - Raymond and Annette attempt to educate Agustín on Taylor Swift’s music, starting off strong with “Enchanted.” It turns out that Agustín enjoys “Christmas Tree Farm.” Do what you will with this information.

12:43 a.m. - They start listening to Nessa Barrett songs for… some reason. They’re in paaaaiiiiin.

12:45 a.m. - No more Nessa Barrett songs.

12:52 a.m. - “I like that laugh HEHEHEHEHEHE.”

12:55 a.m. - They are listening to early quarantine songs… Why don’t you say so? This lasts for a while.

1:32 a.m. - Karaoke session ensues. Also, Kidz Bop.

1:43 a.m. - Friendship ended with Agustín and Annette because Raymond found out they do not like “Bob’s Burgers” (AKA Raymond digs himself deeper into a deep, dark hole by admitting he likes “Bob’s Burgers.”)

1:48 a.m. - Friendship ended with Agustín and Annette again because Agustín confused “Bob’s Burgers” with “South Park” and Annette confused “Bob’s Burgers” with “Family Guy.” Sorry (not really). In Annette and Agustín’s defense, it was late.

1:51 a.m. - Agustín leaves Raymond and Annette. All alone, once more.

1:56 a.m. - Annette gains a lithp via retainer (shoutout to all the people who’ve had braces and feel her pain).

2:02 a.m. - Raymond makes an absolutely groundbreaking discovery. He’s out of breath due to his rush to write this down. His voice shakes. The first-floor Cabot bathroom sink no longer scalds you when you use it for more than five seconds. (The next day, he learns that this was just a fluke, and he goes back to being sad.)

2:05 a.m. - Annette finds out that everything is a lie. Raymond is a fraud: He was not born and raised in Brooklyn like he so proudly proclaims (For clarification, he was born in Manhattan and raised in Brooklyn, so he’s only a half fraud at most). But at least Raymond is not a Queens resident like Annette.

2:14 a.m. - Raymond and Annette ask each other questions from a Teen Vogue quiz for best friends. They discuss high school crushes, gossip about people, and major life questions like concentration ideas, what they want to do after graduating, and how they can most easily become TikTok famous and drop out.

3:49 a.m. - They head to bed — or more like Annette heads to the floor while Raymond makes an unsound makeshift bed out of three chairs.

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6:00 a.m. - Annette wakes up thinking the night is over. Unfortunately, there are two more hours of sleeping on the hard floor.

7:51 a.m. - Raymond wakes up sad, shivering, and sore.

8:00 a.m. - Annette and Raymond get up and face the walk of shame back to their dorms. There are quite a few people in the basement of Cabot at this early hour, and they realize people could definitely see them sleeping through the window.

Here’s what Annette and Raymond learned from their Sleepover in Cabot:

Don’t do a sleepover in Cabot.

It’s never too early to play Christmas music.

Don’t do a sleepover in Cabot. Just don’t do it. Go back to your dorm. Sleep in your (bigger) bed.

But if you’re really adamant, here’s their advice:

Bring a sleeping bag like Annette did—in fact, bring multiple sleeping bags *and* many, many pillows to cushion you from the cold, hard Cabot floor. Or maybe just sleep on one of those sofa chairs.

Bundle up and wear warm clothes because it can get cold.

Reserve a room for a good portion of the night so you aren’t bothered.

And last, but certainly not least, if you’re going to subject yourself to suffering, make sure you bring along a couple of friends so at least you’re all suffering together.

More pictures!

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