For those of you who missed it—or were too creeped out to go—FlyBy swung by the semi-secret Sorrento Square social organization that used to occasionally publish a so-called humor magazine’s intro comp meeting last night, a smoke-filled affair that featured a bit of lore, a bit of hyperbole, and, well, a damn nice building (or at least part of it).
Prospective compers were ushered in through the door facing Claverly and into the building to the left. The corridor to the right that leads up to main part of the castle—yeah, the part where they throw the parties—was blocked off with a curtain and a bored looking staffer. Unfortunately, the details on that part of the castle will have to wait.
But the part of the castle we did see was admittedly a great throwback to the Lampoon’s founding days (roughly speaking), quite pretentious, and worth remembering.
Details after the jump.
This year’s sardonic lit comp directors Nathaniel H. Stein '10 and John B. Owen '10 led the meeting in a room in the part of the castle near Plympton Street. The room, a circular creation, featured book-lined walls—everything from a collection of bound Time magazines to a set of now-dead alumnus John Updike’s Rabbit, Run series. On top of the bookcases stood a collection of knick-knacks that included an empty bottle of Maker’s Mark—a FlyBy favorite—a bottle of peroxide, a pink Flamingo, and the Improper Bostonian’s 2008 award for “the party you weren’t invited to.”
Wide-eyed freshmen sat on the floor of the red-carpeted room while staff-writers perched on the windows and perpetually ordered everyone to squeeze in, a process akin to herding cats. All the while, members of the Lampoon stood around smoking in a room that was no more than 15 feet in diameter. Apparently putting up with a smoke-filled, claustrophobia-inducing room is a comp requirement. But while FlyBy could’ve used a smoke, none, it seemed, were in the offing.
The rest of the meeting proceeded with more smoking—take note compers, Mores seem to the Lampoon's cigarette of choice—and a litany of hyperbole about the checkered history of the magazine, its pranks, and comper contributions of their own pranks.
Some highlights:
- “Every year we produce five hundred issues.”
- During his time at the Lampoon Conan O’Brien told Burt Ward, the man known for his role as Robin in Batman, that he represented a security firm retained to protect his Robin costume during Ward's visit to Harvard. By masquerading as a security firm O’Brien stole the costume, allegedly one of Ward's few sources of income, and took it back to the castle where members of the Lampoon repeatedly tried it on until the police forced them to return it. But at 6’5” O’Brien had stretched the suit to the point where Ward was never able to wear it again.
- From a comper, “After my girlfriend cheated on me, I replaced her conditioner with Nair.” The result? “Nice and smooth for the next guy,” said a Lampoon staffer.
- One of the Lampoon’s first Jewish editors got in a fight with his advisers during the 1950s. The subsequently threatened to have him ad-boarded and expelled. The writer retreated to the castle where he sat holed up with textbooks studying for days (unclear why the need for textbooks). After spending several days in isolation, the writer went to a pet-store to buy 15 rabid dogs. He then went to Lamont Library where he proceeded to paint the book-cases with meat sauce. While the writer chatted up the guard, a friend of his entered the library with the dogs and released them. The dogs proceeded to eat all the books in the library. Fact or fiction? You decide.
The rest of the meeting proceeded much like most of the other intro-meetings of the pretentious literary magazines on campus, though with fewer pairs of horn-rimmed glasses than FlyBy would’ve like to see—only one by our reckoning.
Oh, and they were nice enough to serve beer, Bud Light to be precise. FlyBy gladly drank up.
Thanks for the beer, guys.
Photo: Crimson/Hillary W. Berkowitz