The coolest thing by far about Brown’s basketball program is that its associate head coach is TJ Sorrentine, the Vermont graduate best known for sealing the Catamounts’ 2005 NCAA tournament upset of Syracuse with one of the most arrogantly awesome three-point attempts I’ve ever seen, a 30-foot intercontinental missile of a shot with eight seconds left on the shot clock. Sorrentine might have to throw on a jersey and launch a few of those bombs if the Bears are to have any shot in Jadwin Gymnasium.
Pick: Princeton
HARVARD V. COLUMBIA
This has the potential to be the most competitive game of the weekend. The Lions’ three conference losses have come by a combined 13 points, and they battled to a respectable six-point defeat at Princeton last Saturday. The Crimson hasn’t exactly been convincing in their last few games, either. Columbia took Harvard to overtime in New York last year, and on the back end of a long road trip, I foresee some serious upset possibilities.
Pick: Columbia
YALE V. PRINCETON
Early on, it’s looking like a two-horse race for Ivy League Player of the Year between Harvard’s Wes Saunders and the Tigers’ Ian Hummer, who is averaging 15.9 points, 6.7 rebounds, and 4.5 assists per game, good for second, fifth, and third in the conference, respectively. Hummer is also probably evil, given that he scowls a lot and wears an arm sleeve. I hope both teams lose this game.
Pick: Princeton
BROWN V. PENN
At 4-16, the Quakers have already exceeded their loss total in each of the past two seasons. As members of the nouveau riche class of Ivy men’s basketball, it’s fun for the Crimson faithful to watch old money teams like Penn trade in their Audi for a 1997 two-door Chevrolet Cavalier. Oh, by the way, the passenger-side window doesn’t work, Quaker. And you’re going to lose to Brown.
Pick: Brown
DARTMOUTH V. CORNELL
It’s the first installment of the battle of the Big Colors, and I couldn’t be more indifferent to the result. I know it’s questionable for a fellow chromatically-nicknamed institution to throw stones, but think of the other verdant things Dartmouth bypassed on its way to “Big Green”: dragons, snakes, lizards, all much more vicious than a hue that evokes “springtime” or “envy.” They deserve to lose just for that.
Pick: Cornell
--Staff writer Andrew R. Mooney can be reached at mooney@college.harvard.edu