For the athletes: Harvard’s athletes already play in stadiums that are almost empty anyway. Making the leap to completely empty would be simple and most would easily make the transition.
This would also hurt opponents in two ways. First, visitors wouldn’t be able two ways. First, visitors wouldn’t be able to bring their fans with them. At many home sporting events, the number of opposing fans equals or surpasses the number of Harvard fans, rendering the contest a de facto neutral site game. Sure the same is true in a no-fan arena, but at least spectators won’t be able to motivate the other team either.
Second, you’ve got to figure playing in that environment for the first time would be down-right unsettling. How do you get up for a game like that if you’ve never played in circumstances like that before? You probably can’t. Advantage, Harvard.
For the fans: Come on. Most of you aren’t going anyway. This lets you save face. Why aren’t you going to the game? Because I was so damn rowdy the last time out they won’t let me back into the stadium. Wow, you sound like a really hardcore fan, even though you don’t even know what Allston looks like.
And for those who actually would go to the games, you no longer need endure the shame of being virtually alone in the stands, abandoned by your peers.
I’ll admit there are some logistical details that I haven’t quite thought through just yet. For example, just how would we pull this off?
Enter the Boston Police Department (BPD). Captain William Evans (remember him? You threw up on his uniform at The Game) doesn’t like Harvard students too much. He thinks we’re pretentious snobs with no respect for his authority and wants to shut down our tailgates over in Allston.
I’m going to go out on a limb and say he wouldn’t mind banning Harvard students from Boston altogether. See! It’s even a win for the BPD.
Just think about it, Harvard supporters. Our attendance is low now, but it could be a whole lot lower. And we’d all be better fans for it.
—Staff writer Timothy J. McGinn can be reached at mcginn@fas.harvard.edu. His column appears on alternate Fridays.