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COYNE TOSS: Bring Dunks Our Way

Attempt to comprehend the outpouring from such a shockingly new medium.

Indubitably dunks unrivaled in scope and depth would be thrown down by eager young scholars searching for a voice all their own.

The Categorical Imperative would be given a whole new meaning.

Would you like to feel the wake of this 360-degree Hegelian Dialectic?

Don’t get cut by the slashing of my reverse Occam’s Razor.

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Care to behold my First Law of Motion?

Exactly.

Boomfest T-shirts could be made; they might even contain funny slogans like “I’ll Rattle Your Rim” or “I Dunked on Your Sorry Class.”

Courtyard legends would be born. Stories will be retold years from now about how The House Master left his footprints on the backboard, Popcorn Chicken dunked blindfolded, and The Senior Tutor jumped over that kid.

House committees, deans, presidents I beseech you; bring in the noise, bring in the dunk.

—Staff writer J. Patrick Coyne can be reached at coyne@fas.harvard.edu.

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