Lest delegates sought to quench their thirst in a more frugal manner, the friendly organizers at the Garden had taken care of that too: All of the water fountains in the arena were conveniently running dry. This proved a problem for the medical team in section 66, members of which complained that dehydrated delegates had needed treatment at the First Aid station, along with a few “elderly delegates who had drank too much.” Easy, cowboy!

—Joseph M. Tartakoff

WHERE IN THE WORLD IS MICHAEL MOORE?

Michael Moore’s cameo appearance at the Garden Monday night upset more than the usual suspects.

Journalists in the press box where Moore was seated were grumbling that the portly filmmaker’s presence interrupted their work, as photographers and camerapersons swarmed just as deadlines were nearing.

The next day, a Republican media representative attempted to assuage the notoriously demanding press, assuring journalists in the affected section that the “disingenuous filmmaker” would not be making an encore performance at the convention. (Free beer would have helped.)

Asked whether Moore had been expelled, the man replied that he had only been credentialed for one day.

Moore was in town to pen a column for USA Today.

—Joseph M. Tartakoff