Imagine the possibilities. Firstly, there’s no tradition in Boston older than the Red Sox—with the one exception of Harvard, whose upcoming 365th anniversary makes the BoSox’s centennial look tiny. If Harvard were to own the Red Sox, it would be the perfect marriage of Boston’s most permanent residents.

But, Mr. Summers, the real benefits, as always, are in the small details.

Lots of folks are angry that your predecessor, Neil Rudenstine, purchased half of Allston in a recent land grab. So what in the name of Ted Williams are you going to do with all that land? Well, the Red Sox need a new park. You do the math.

And what will happen to Fenway, you might ask? In grand Harvard tradition, you can turn it into a museum. Or, you could create your own tradition, and actually build something undergrads can use, like a student center.

Janitors want a living wage? No problem, you could say—here’s a summer job peddling peanuts at the ballpark. Those vendors make more than $100 a game off commission. Multiply by 81 games, and you’ve just doubled their pay!

You and I also know that the Harvard Business School is losing prestige. Add a graduate course in Baseball General Management and HBS’s popularity will skyrocket. Plus, you can rid yourself of that pesky Dan Duquette by having a steady flow of Harvard-educated general managers at your disposal.

Even the Medical School will benefit. Team doctors could always clear Sox players to play, and HMS’s world-class experimental surgeons would ensure that there are no more career-ending injuries to franchise players.