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Learning About Love

My grandfather is my first dead person. Other dead people have been peripheral, siblings of friends or relatives twice removed. Other people's mothers, other people's grandparents.

It's been a week and I'm still not sure how to feel about it.

I don't want to remember my grandfather as a saint, or hold him bitter against my heart. I'll remember him as he was, alternately angry and loving, teacher and student as I guided him through the intricacies of e-mail on his orange iMac. This way I can keep learning from him, remembering him when I keep people I love at a distance, or when I don't. His death is tragic because there was much more he could have taught me, and because I didn't learn enough while he was alive.

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He wasn't the best grandfather, but he wasn't the worst. And I wasn't the best granddaughter, but I know he thought I wasn't the worst either.

I have distinct memories of him calling me on my birthdays and telling me he loved me.

Meredith B. Osborn '02 is a social studies concentrator in Leverett House. Her column appears on alternate Fridays.

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