Dear Moron--I mean, Two Freshmen Too Many: you're being a jerk. "I am man enough to handle two girls at one time?" What, you're looking for a job in the lucrative and fast-growing field of pornography? You sound like one-hit wonder Gerardo in "Rico Suave"--"There isn't a woman who can handle a man like me / That's why I juggle two or three."

As good as that is musically, it's horrible in real life. You're being

selfish and immature; even your letter is totally self-focused. It's hard to

believe you could find two girls in this world crazy enough to like you. I hope they find out about each other, become friends and then ditch you.

The larger issue, however, is fidelity. If your s.o. cheats on you, end the relationship--you should forgive your ex as a human being, but forgiveness doesn't mean that there are no repercussions.

That's it for this week, but as I mentioned, any more questions for the

Love Doctor would be great. For sticklers expecting to read about sports on the sports page, expect a more conventional column next week.