1. I want Pete Rose to shut up. How far can the man go on the I'm-banned-from-baseball-woe-is-me train? Far enough to get to QVC, where he is hawking autographs for $49.95 a pop. Dealer, please cut him off.

2. I want Jim Gray put on a pedestal. He did nothing wrong in his interview with Rose during the World Series. He's a journalist. It's his job to ask questions.

3. It'd be nice for people to stop saying that the Cleveland Browns' Orlando Brown had cause to attack a referee for throwing a flag in his eye in Sunday's game. I mean, Orlando, so what if he threw a flag in your eye. Big deal. You and your Browns get worse beatings from your opponents every Sunday.

4. I'd like my beloved Packers to make the playoffs. And a win or two would also be nice.

5. I'd like the Bulls to dump general manager Jerry Krause. The man is still riding on his Michael Jordan-finding fame, except someone forgot to tell him that it gave out a long time ago when he drafted Stacey King in the first round. 6. I want Carolina Panthers wide receiver Rae Carruth in jail. The man is a danger to society, allegedly conspiring in the death of his pregnant girlfriend. It looks like this may be one wish I've already been granted.

7. I'd like hockey teams to move back to Canada. I'm not advocating the extradition for all of them, mind you, just the ones that are in places like Nashville, Raleigh, Atlanta and Phoenix.

8. I'd like Ken Griffey Jr. to stay in Seattle. Not enough baseball players spend their careers in the same place. I mean, Roger Clemens will probably be in the Hall of Fame in a New York Yankees cap. How'd that happen?