My mom and I were grocery shopping one day and when we got to the checkout line, I saw that the cashier was this dreamy football player from my math class. I wanted to be able to talk to him alone, so I asked my mom to just leave and give me the money and I would handle everything alone. So as he was bagging my food, he kept giving me these sly smiles and I was feeling like we were clicking really well. When I got home to unload the groceries, I remembered we had picked up some laxatives for my dad! Now the whole school thinks I have a constipation problem. Talk about letting the wind out of my sails!
Pitching a Tent
I was watching the "Sex" film festival when the scene with the two female bonobos performing "hoka-hoka" (genito-genital rubbing) on each other came on. To my surprise, I found myself becoming extremely aroused. To make a long story short, I had to walk out of the science center with my girlfriend's sweater tied around my waist. It was sooo embarrassing.
Where's The Party?
This senior guy was having a party once and I was so excited because I was the only freshman invited. So I made sure I looked really cute in my white tank top and tight-fitting jeans and got my dad to drop me off at exactly the right time. But when I got to the door, I noticed that there was only one car outside, there was no noise and most of the windows were dark! When he answered the door, he explained to me that the party was actually the next day and I must have gotten the date wrong. I was so embarrassed!
But he was a sweetie and told me I could join him for the night anyway. How dreamy!
Staimaster Disaster
I was on the stairmaster at the QRAC trying to burn off those last 50 calories from breakfast and I was getting totally sweaty, like, just totally gross, and surprise! In comes my Ec. TF, who is not only my TF but also totally hot. I totally didn't know what to do and my face flushed even more and I tried to, like, wipe off with my T-shirt but this just messed up my mascara and made things worse. Totally humiliated, because he was obviously one of those people who looks *good* when he sweats, I decided just to suck up my pride and say hi when he passed. But, just as he was passing, I glanced down and realized that I had just gotten my period--in a big way! I was so embarrassed that I let out a huge, wet, smelly fart. He looked so disgusted and hasn't been nearly as nice to me in class, ever since!
Revealing Address
II'd been so nervous for two weeks about the speech I was going to give when I was running for student council president in 12th grade. I practiced in front of the mirror every evening until I could recite it by heart. I picked out the perfect outfit: an off-white twinset, a flowing knee-length navy blue skirt, navy pumps, and nude control-top sheer panty-hose. I was holding my head high, trying to look confident while walking onto the podium. To calm myself, I tried to imagine everyone in the audience in their underwear. People started giggling and snickering, and I didn't know why, until I realized that THEY could see MY underwear!! I had tucked my skirt into my pantyhose!! I ran off the stage in tears without finishing my speech. I was voted president anyway, but to this day, my friends call me "Sweet Cheeks."