11. The Science Center is one of the strangest buildings ever made. It was probably funny during the planning stage, but having to walk into a Polaroid Camera every day is a little odd. And there are a few too many Macintoshes in the computer lab. The line for the laser printer is so long you'd think they were giving away free tickets to "Airheads."

12. The stacks of Widener are fun. Try playing "see who can re-arrange the books fastest". Or have sex there. No joke, Harvard students are supposed to before they graduate. It's a myth, probably spawned by the fact that Harvard students never have sex.

13. Everyone loves the Crimson. No, really.

14. Movie-watching is not easy. After you've seen everything at the theater on Church Street, you want to go to Loews Fresh Pond to see something good. Take my advice: rent a video. Alewife is further away than the cute little "T" map would have you believe. And once you get there it's a nature hike to make it to the theater. You mountain-climb after crossing the most imposing bridge you never wanted to see. Not worth the effort, or the prickers.

15. Never go to Yale.

16. Go the "The Garage" home of Newbury Comics but more importantly, Beebop Burrito. You have not lived until you have gone toe-to-toe with a Super Burrito. The density and the power of a Beebop Burrito is matched only by that of the Hydrogen bomb.

17. The Harvard Lampoon is hilarious. No, really.

18. The Boston Church of Christ parties are loads of fun. Disregard whatever you have heard from your proctor or your dean. Bring your friends. Membership has its privileges.

19. If you live in a non-smoking dorm, it means that no one is allowed to smoke. Right?

20. The Charles River is the happenin-est swimmin' hole on the planet. Love that dirty water.

Maybe I haven't picked up too much pre-cal this summer, but I've learned about the real world.