Because of varying degrees of concern with fitness and physical appearance, schools are probably out there with better-looking female populations. (Most likely, such schools have better-looking male populations too.)

In any case, physical appearance isn't everything--most Harvard men have pretty much come to grips with the fact that life is not a David Lee Roth video.

7. Flirting has become a lot more awkward. Activism focusing on issues ranging from date rape to unwanted sexual advances has made Harvard men more nervous about their behavior, innocent or not.

Besides, the Northeast, bourgeois, secularly Puritan culture of Harvard is hardly the most openly sexual in the world. People here are less comfortable with flirting, a rather important prelude to dating, than in societies such as Italy, France, or even Southern California.

8. Dating has not always been an accepted norm. Our "memories" of the past are of a romantic period in which dating took on a greater social importance. My mother remarks that, when she attended Penn in the mid-1960s, she had dates with three people in a single day. (My mother happened to be an unabashed flirt.)

But, as Camille Paglia has observed, the reality is that throughout history, women have been chaperoned and greatly restricted. Marriages in most parts of the world were arranged until this century. Dating is a very recent phenomenon.

9. Lighten up. The situation is probably not all that bad. It often seems as if everyone who discusses dating at Harvard is complaining about it. This makes sense. When people gloat, the natural reaction is a desire to punch them. Besides, people pleasurably involved in relationships usually have better things to do than openly analyze their situation.

The reality is that dating is still what someone makes of it. The way humans tend to complain and listen to others complain sometimes obscures this reality.

And, of course, griping about the dating scene here is nothing new. Harvard students have been complaining about dating almost as long as they've been complaining about the food.