"I'D like two grams of cocaine, one ounce of pot, and, let's see, five quaaludes," said the middle-aged professional to the man behind the counter.

"What kinda coke would ya like. Merck or Squibb? By the way, you know, we have a special on 'ludes--buy six, get one free."

"O.K., give me six quaaludes, and I'll go for the Merck Last time I used Squibb, it just wasn't that good."

AS fantastic as this scenario sounds, more and more people are starting to think that the complete legalization of narcotics is the only way to bring the drug problem under control.

Mayor of Baltimore Kurt L. Schmoke made national news last week when, before a gathering of the country's mayors in Washington, D.C., suggested that Congress set up a committee to reconsider America's current drug policies.

Schmoke is one of the few elected officials who has dared to swim against the current of the "Say 'No' To Drugs" fervor. He argues that the country might be better by simply conceding the war against drugs and make the best of a bad situation.

Prohibition was a law designed for the public good but which caused more problems than it solved. Just like the end of Prohibition the legalization of narcotics would provide a host of important benefits.

Benefit #1: The end of drug-related crime.

Gangs of youths have become the principal organizations for drug trafficking in the nation's major cities. The gangs are resorting to more and more violent measures to protect their turfs, avoid police interference and enforce discipline. Los Angeles saw 387 gang homicides in 1987 alone. In New York City, gang violence has taken 500 lives during the past five years.

Police have attempted to bring the gangs under control, using almostrepressive measures including mass arrests to scare the youngsters. But the gang members outnumber and outgun law enforcement officers. Last march, a rookie New York cop was assassinated by a cocaine kingpin's hitman.

Equally important, a large percentage of non-gang crime is drug-related as millions of addicts do almost anything to secure their next fix. Thousands of innocents become victims of theft, murder, and assault from drug-crazed citizens.

Legalizing narcotics would strip the gangs of their incomes and reasons for violence. This move would deliver a crippling blow to organized crime, and the lower costs of drugs would ease the pressure on addicts to get money.

Benefit #2: Improved health of the country

Right now, millions of Americans are possibly using drugs filled with deadly impurities and injected with AIDS-infected needles.

Under legalization, the federal government could regulate the drug industry to make ensure that distributors are not putting PCP into cocaine. Clean cheap needles would be available to drug users, something many cities are already considering.