Sen. Arlen Specter (R-PA): Judge Reinhold, if God is all-powerful, can he make a rock so big that even he couldn't lift it? Or, following up that line, if a tree falls in the woods, but nobody is around to hear it....

Sen. Kennedy: In Judge Reinhold's America, there is no room for pigeon-toed Irdu toll booth attendants.

Sen. Paul Simon (D-IL): Mr. Chairman, things are getting out of hand. I assure you, Judge Reinhold, being the only man here wearing a bow-tie, I know what it means to feel like a clown. But let me remind you, these hearings are no circus. I have before me, Judge, a very damaging document. It is a letter sent to your home many years ago by your third grade teacher. She reports that you ate, in one sitting, an entire box of crayola crayons. Do you know that it is illegal to eat public property?

Judge Reinhold: Bitchin'.

Sen. Simon: Do you think it is proper for a former lawbreaker to be on the highest court in the land? Please answer the question.

Judge Reinhold: Is there a john around here?

Sen. Biden: I'm sorry Judge Reinhold but if Sen. Simon says answer the question, then you know what that means.

All, in unison: Simon says! Simon says!

(Pandemonium breaks out in the Senate Caucus Room as the Judiciary Committee members jump up and down on their chairs giving the bewildered Judge Reinhold the raspberry. Once again, the Senate has affirmed its Constitutional right to confirm, reject or tease a Presidential nominee to the Supreme Court.)