"And we're on crew--our whole room's on the baby crew team--and we're in the band," Inga adds. "And we hated the mixer."

"Yeah, the mixer was the worst part of the week." Betsy agrees. "It was so anticlimactic. It was totally punk, it was bad, it was terrible, it was awful."

Inga did have one Freshman Week experience all to herself. "Someone came up to me and gave me a big hug and said, 'Wow, you made varsity soccer!' I don't even know what a soccer ball looks like. He saw I was confused, and he said, 'Inga?' I said, 'Yeah, Inga Larson.' It turns out he meant Inga Parsons-- that's the only other Inga I've ever heard of. But I said, 'That's O.K.--you can keep hugging me."

Greg Lyss is part of a vocal minority. "Everyone says the mixer was bad," he says. "These people just don't know how to enjoy themselves. You boogie a little, cruise around, pinch a few asses--it's great! Of course, it helps to drink a pint of gin beforehand. But you know what: The highlight of the entire week was the square dance. You definitely had to be shitfaced for that."

By yesterday, though, Greg was all business, clutching a shopping bag full of textbooks. "There's $84 worth of books in here--I got the Lincoln-Douglas debates, the books for my tutorial [Greg is a government concentrator with sophomore standing], some Shakespeare--I mean, what kind of liberal arts education can you get without reading a little Willie?"

He shifts the bag of books in his arms and sights. "It was a great week. There were just a couple of tests--everything else was just rest and relaxation; just drink a few beers, sleep about two hours a night. For a while, I really thought they should have called this place 'Camp Harvard.'"