In the background, Carter could hear the former first lady say, "Maybe it's Walter Cronkite again, dear."

Exasperated, the president yelled into the phone, "This is Jimmy Carter. The president!"

Ford turned to Betty again and said, "He says he's the president."

Carter heard Mrs. Ford laugh. "Well, you know Walter. Things have gone to his head."

THIS IS NOT Walter Cronkite," the president insisted. "It's President Carter."

"Betty, he says he's President Carter. Do you know anyone by that name?"

"Well, dear, the last name is the same as that nice man you debated four years ago. You know, the one who thought Poland wasn't free," Mrs. Ford answered.

"Oh, now I remember," Ford said, speaking into the phone. "Hello, it's nice to hear from you again. What can I do for you?"

The president repeated, "I want you to be my vice president, Mr. Former President."

"Well, why didn't you say so. As you know, I have been negotiating with other prominent individuals--are you a prominent individual?"

"In a way," Carter responded.

"Good, then I'll make the same proposal to you I've made to the others. I get to make all cabinet appointments and ambassadorial selections. The entire White House staff will report to me. I am entitled to half of all gifts foreign officials give you, and I get to play in the White House elevator any time I want."

Carter pondered for a minute. "The part about the elevator is a little much, don't you think?"

"All right," Ford conceded. "But I have dibs on the toaster oven in the upstairs kitchen."

"Sounds good," Carter said. "Just one thing--what will I do?"