Golfer Spence Fitzgibbons: "The only reason I took up the game was to learn how to color-coordinate my clothes. It didn't work. People still think I'm the Eliot House superintendent."
Diver Jamie Greecen: "One of these meets I'd just like to bag the pike position and do a ten-meter can-opener."
Football coach Joe Restic: "If there was a center eligible rule in the Ivies we'd win the league championship each year."
IAB director Kevin McCall: "Hey, isn't that a university sheet?"
Chairman of the Standing Committee on Athletics and Government professor James Q. Wilson: "The biggest bureaucracy isn't in Washington, D. C. It's here at Harvard. Just try getting into a pickup game at the IAB on Friday afternoons.
You'll have to excuse me if I didn't get some of the quotes right, but what can you say about a guy who wears a contour sheet and a down vest to his own toga party?