The Freshman Class numbered seven thousand fighting men, each of whom was armed with a Wiard rifled cannon, loaded with five hundred kegs of carving-knives, and one thousand barrels of dualin.

The Sophomores, on the other hand, were provided with navy revolvers, mowing-machines, bowie-knives, circular saws, masked batteries, and mitrailleuses.

After a few unimportant skirmishes, the two classes joined battle in what is called the Lower Port, an extensive marsh which lies between Boston and Cambridge; the Freshmen charged their enemy, who received them with open mouths, and swallowed five thousand of them, each Sophomore picking his man; the remainder then fled in disorder, and have never been seen or heard of since.

After this sickening manifestation of anthro-pophagic barbarity, the Sophomores turned back upon Boston, and the latest telegrams announce that they are at present engaged in devouring the lightning-rods on the new Post-Office building.

Later, - Midnight.A telegram just received from the scene of action announces that the Sophomores, after razing the city of Boston to the ground, surrendered to the authorities of Cambridge, and, being taken before the Police Court in that city, were fined five dollars and costs each, a just and fitting punishment for their inhuman atrocities.

We sincerely trust that justice will be meted out in a similarly stern manner upon the next Sophomore. Class which destroys Boston, and hope that, overawed by swift punishment, student communism will be eventually banished from within our midst.

*See Boston Sunday Herald, March 15.