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The Scary, Narrow Minded, Out of Touch Party for Stuffy Old Men

And other gems from the Republicans’ attempted renaissance

“We sound increasingly out of touch,” bemoaned a self-flagellating report released last week by the Republican National Committee, endearingly dubbed the election autopsy by the national media. Although it seeks to remedy the Republican Party’s alienating, self-destructive zeal for ideological purity and near religious commitment to obsolescence, the report proposes disappointingly few policy changes, faultily focusing on the electoral mechanics of fundraising and primaries.

The Republican Party, firmly fixed in an echo chamber where dissent is anathema, is content with blaming the messaging rather than the message.

Some within the conservative commentariat praise the report’s unsparing candor, and indeed some admissions will edge liberal schadenfreude towards euphoria. Deliciously, the report commissioned by five establishment insiders for RNC Chairman Reince Priebus begins by cautioning, “The Republican party needs to stop talking to itself.” Then comes the acceptance that it is increasingly seen by the public as the party of “stuffy old men” that is “scary, narrow minded, and out of touch.”

The few substantive policy recommendations made by the autopsy include more moderate positions on immigration and marriage equality. Both are sensible and pragmatic, however resistant the base may be. But given the deification of recalcitrance currently in vogue in Republican circles, change seems unlikely even in the face of demographic shifts. As if amnesiac, the report expunges any mention of the recent, shameful campaign of needlessly restrictive voter identification laws, and instead incredulously wonders why minority voters so lopsidedly favor the Democratic Party.

Unreflectively, the report makes no mention of the alienating hardline positions on abortion and reproductive rights when discussing the party’s disconnect with women voters.

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Republicans refuse to let their soundly rejected pet philosophies die, obsessively resuscitating failed ideas like the draconian and disingenuous Ryan budget into increasingly grotesque zombies. Michelle Bachmann mindlessly preaches that the Affordable Care Act will “literally kill” vulnerable women, children, and senior citizens, while Senate Republicans have unsuccessfully attempted to repeal it thirty six times.

The Conservative Political Action Conference, the annual pilgrimage for conservatives to bask in hagiographies of Ronald Reagan, ostensibly functions to anoint future leaders of the party. So what promising upstarts with fresh new ideas were showcased at the convention? Along with the tired bromides of Sarah Palin, Mitt Romney, and Rick Santorum, came the expected inane babblings of Bachmann, and yes, Donald Trump. Actually forward-thinking Republican leaders, who still retain a modicum of relevance, like Governor Chris Christie of New Jersey and Governor Bob McDonnell of Virginia, were snubbed for appearing too insufficiently conservative.

Not maintaining a charade of obstinate hatred for President Obama or the other bêtes noires of the modern Republican Party is apparently enough to make a truly admirable leader persona non grata.

More disconcerting than who was not invited to CPAC was who showed up.

In keeping with the party’s fashionable obdurate groupthink, presidential hopeful and Florida Senator Marco Rubio exclaimed in his wildly applauded peroration, “We don’t need a new idea…The idea is called America. And it still works!” Meanwhile Texas Senator and Republican wunderkind Ted Cruz calmly asserted, “We’re winning right now.”

The RNC’s frantic report urging progress beyond the endless gridlock championed by Congressional Republicans seems to recognize the reality of a fast descent into mediocrity. Such a sentiment could not be found among the gleeful patrons of CPAC, more in the throes of reaffirmation than needed reformation.

Peggy Noonan, the conservative Wall Street Journal columnist and former Reagan speechwriter, rightly pointed out the stifled state of debate in the modern Republican party. She quoted Joe Scarborough, who attributes the atrophied intellectual character of the party to “conservative groupthink over 30 years that’s become more and more narrow,” as compared to the vibrant debates of the nineties.

In order to avoid crashing off the cliff of sanity and landing in an abyss of obsolescence, the Republican Party must quickly veer from its currently trajectory. Instead of hunkering in trenches and fighting the inexorable enmity of an increasingly alienated public, Republicans should critically address the substantive reasons for their recent electoral failures. Nothing short of a substantial redesign is required for its survival.

The Republicans must focus on their product rather than its packaging. The current unofficial slogan, The All-New GOP (Now With 25 Percent Less Crazy), simply will not do.

Idrees Kahloon ’16 is a Crimson editorial writer in Weld Hall. His column appears on alternate Wednesdays. Follow him on Twitter @ikahloon

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