College students are almost always hungry. Whether we’re starving in 10 a.m. lecture or walking out of one of the dining halls after enjoying Sunday dinner, we are never satisfied. Unfortunately, Harvard University Dining Services is obligated to cater to our endless dietary restrictions and bizarre daily cravings.
We complain to anyone that will listen—our lab partners, our roommates, the random man you pass on the way back from lunch—but some students overcome their laziness and actually fill out HUDS comment cards with requests. Below, FM takes a look at a few absurd requests.
“When rice is served in Lowell, could it be placed first in line? Most people prefer to put meat or vegetables on top of rice, and it is awkward to have it after the entrées.”
We don’t know about you, but we can think of many more awkward dining hall encounters. Like when you realize you’ve been staring at the guy you drunkenly hooked up with last night, or when you spill soda on that cute girl in your Ec10 section.
“Cheeseburger, fries, hot dogs erryday.”
Now that parents are unable to control every aspect of students’ lives, college is liberating in many ways. Apparently this student is so happy to be free from family meals that he or she would like to see HUDS become a fast food restaurant.
Various requests for almond milk, fruit fro-yo, gluten-free stir fry, egg-free pasta, etc.
When you suffer from a dietary restriction, you can’t trust anyone or anything. It’s like the Hunger Games, but worse. Every man for himself. First Cheerios announces that they are not, in fact, gluten-free. Then, you get lost in the sea of pasta, bread, and ice cream. What’s a gluten-free, lactose-free student to do? Apparently, ask for all the rare stuff.
“Have Jerry cook more often—he’s awesome!”
In light of all the complaints and criticisms, at least one student can appreciate HUDS for what it is. You are clearly doing something right, Jerry. Keep doing you.
