The recent passage of Question One in Maine has struck a blow against gay marriage and against supporters of equal rights. Yet much of the popular acrimony directed at gay marriage could be caused by confusion rather than discrimination. The gay marriage debate is now so tangled in religious terminology that questions of legal equality can get easily lost in the language. Fortunately, there might be a way for gay couples to gain the same legal status as straight couples that sidesteps this incessant fighting in courtrooms and polling booths.

Today it is much too easy to conflate the awarding of rights to gay Americans with a government takeover of religious institutions. One fundamental problem is that our laws employ the religious term “marriage” to define what should be solely a legal concept. From Uncle Sam’s perspective, a union of individuals—gay or straight—should be treated as strictly part of the legal apparatus, and not related to a religious ceremony. If we can divorce religious terminology from our legal system, we can afford gay Americans equal rights—while leaving religious groups the ability to determine the meaning and rules of their own private services.

A government-granted union between two individuals should be recognized as only a civil union, not a marriage, under the law. To use the term “marriage” equates a legal union with a religious one. This skews the debate over same-sex marriage for those who may not be opposed to gay unions but believe in a strict biblical definition of the word marriage. To remedy this, gay and straight couples could be treated as equals under the law in that both could receive a civil union, which has no religious implications.

Redefining the same-sex marriage debate in this way has the potential to separate questions of legal equality from religion. A more clear division will also help to ensure that the status of equality for all Americans is not dictated by religious sensibilities, but rather by civil rights. This simple solution could eliminate some of the current anger surrounding the gay marriage discussion.