MIT: President Obama visited our sister college down Mass. Ave. last week, giving a speech on clean energy and reminding Techies that Nobel Prizes do exist outside chemistry.

Spin: After this summer’s beer summit, Harvard held a 1-0 advantage in the category of “Professors Who Have Met The President.” Now that lead has vanished. MIT appears to be positioning itself to steal the title of World’s Greatest University—we must attack at once.

The Spee: This old boys’ club just got a little more elitist, adding new old boy Justin Timberlake to the fold. Timberlake’s latest movie, “The Social Network,” is paying the Spee handsomely for using it in the film.

Spin: It’s not as awesome as it seems. They’re only filming there because they thought it was the Phoenix.

Daylight Saving Time: What comes up must come down—this weekend, clocks fall back, and students fall back to sleep for one more hour.

Spin: Make sure you’re not that guy who forgets and shows up to lecture an hour early on Monday.

Purell: Remember when your stock consultant told you that investing in a clear, lube-like gel wouldn’t pan out? Well, look who’s laughing now—Purell’s stock rose 50 points this week on fears of swine flu.

Spin: Well, OK, this didn’t really happen, but it seems plausible, right?

Coffee: You’ll think twice now about that triple-mocha latte, ever since six Harvard graduate students were poisoned when sodium azide somehow got into their joe. Authorities suspect foul play, but no motives or suspects are immediately obvious.

Spin: Oh, how we long for the days when coffee just killed you by rotting out your teeth, introducing a powerful stimulant drug into your bloodstream, and feeding you carcinogenic sugar substitutes.

Mets fans: The New York Yankees are your crosstown rivals. The Philadelphia Phillies are the hated usurpers of the division that is rightfully yours. So of course those two teams are meeting up in the World Series.

Spin: Face it, guys. Someone up there hates you.

Tom Menino: The long-time mayor of Boston, seeking to be elected to an unprecedented fifth term next Tuesday, is under fire from his opponent for a “culture of corruption” in City Hall.

Spin: It doesn’t matter, though, because no one at Harvard is aware that there’s an election going on.

Swine Flu: New data from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention report up to 5.7 million cases of swine flu in the nation this spring, with a significant number of them going undiagnosed.

Spin: All of them seem to be the kids in your section. Kleenex?