How to keep moviegoers flocking to the cinema in these times of emptying wallets and waning summer days? Hollywood seems to think it has a surefire recipe with “Righteous Kill.” Take two aging but legendary actors of ye olde gangster cinema, mix in rappers, guns, and badges, add a healthy portion of serial-killer storyline, and top it off with a dash of cheap twist ending. But if I really wanted to draw out this clichéd food metaphor, this Al Pacino/Robert De Niro tag-team event would have to be more of a reheated meatloaf than a zesty fettucine alfredo.

De Niro and Pacino, two of the most esteemed living movie actors, play a duo of disgruntled, aging homocide detectives on the NYPD in the midst of a serial killer investigation. The movie kicks off hard and fast, introducing our protagonists as they fire guns at targets to the sensory assault of pounding guitar riffs and flashy credits. You would think it was an action film, right? Instead, the movie descends into a plodding suspense thriller with eerie pseudo-philosophical voiceovers, hints of love triangle, and stylish cuts from scene to scene, all while still managing to evade any morsel of complexity or implied action.

Soon you realize that these movie legends are being paid millions to pull a simple trick on you. But at that point, your ten dollars are already spent. Immerse yourself in canned, simplistic dialogue and predictable plot twists, then marvel at De Niro and Pacino’s flabby, AARP exteriors and the hot forensic scientist babes who are inexplicably attracted to them!

The problem is that “Righteous Kill” relies upon clichés instead of taking time to actually develop. The audience is deprived of smart, realistic dialogue that does not explain everything for them. Despite the considerable acting range of the movie’s leading Italians, both are wasted among a cast of underdeveloped and stale characters: the angry retiring cop, the angry retiring cop’s partner, two hotheaded rival cops, and the police chief who tries to keep a lid on things.

All suspense and mystery in the thriller builds up but quickly deflates as the plot retraces past events without illuminating important details. “Righteous Kill” seems to slow down just so it can speed up again toward a lukewarm climax. The final twist is less shocking than it is groan-inducing.

There are only a few good things to be found in the extremely mediocre movie experience that is “Righteous Kill”. At the beginning of the movie, De Niro and Pacino trade barbs of black humor in the midst of murder scenes, which are good for a laugh. De Niro gives a disturbingly disconnected voiceover throughout most of the movie, as he recounts the death visited upon the film’s numerous murder victims.

Also, if you love trendy pop culture icons, the movie features 50 “Curtis Jackson” Cent doing his best impression of a real drug dealer. My favorite part was watching Fitty’s head get blown off and seeing his body crash through a glass window to the floor below. Sorry for the spoiler, but I’m assuming you won’t get around to renting this one.

“Righteous Kill” is a tragic unity of two great actors that accomplishes nothing for either their careers or the detective genre. The saddest part is that “Righteous Kill” is the first true moment that De Niro and Pacino have joined forces. Despite the tendency of critics and fans to lump them together, De Niro and Pacino have shared credits in just two movies, “Heat” and “The Godfather Part II”—and even then, they share the screen only once. Alas, we all wished for something better, but the moment is completely wasted. The movie deserves extra negative points for shattering all the respect that I had for cinematic icons.

—Staff writer Alec E. Jones can be reached at aejones@fas.harvard.edu.