Why is the sky blue? How does time work? Are there invisible worlds?

Are you dying to impress kindergarteners? Then Science A is for you!

Even if you don’t know MC-squared from MC Hammer, logging a semester in the Science Center is inevitable. But if you choose your science dose carefully, you will learn answers to those most basic and burning questions about the universe—and get a decent grade, even if you are a science-phobe.

You will have to do a modicum of work—otherwise, you’ll find yourself melting down faster than you can say “TI-89 in a Bunsen burner.” So sally forth, future Science A-listers.

The course names of the Science A spectrum may seem neat, but the content can be deceptively difficult and dreary. Science A purports to be a collection of courses which focuses on the hows and whys of physical sciences—explaining natural phenomena, that is. It’s more quantitative than Science B, and physics is the scientific area that rears its head most often during lecture, so pat yourself on the back if you actually remember some stuff from high school.

Most Science A courses involve weekly problem sets, so before you commit yourself to a course, make sure you’ll be able to marshall the efforts of your (smart) friends when you’re (drunkenly) scrambling to finish the set on a Thursday night. Lectures are generally half-full (half-empty?) and videotaped, which is a mixed blessing. On the one hand, you’ll get extra sleep during the year. But the day before the final you’ll also learn perhaps the greatest lesson Science A can offer—that watching 7 weeks worth of lectures in 12 hours is physically impossible. Damn that fourth dimension!

Science A-47, “Cosmic Connections” is the ultimate Science A experience for aspiring science fiction writers. The trippy name matches the material, as topics covered include everything from dark matter to black holes. The cost for connecting to the cosmos is class at 10 a.m. in a windowless lecture hall; the reward is a plethora of facts about the universe and theoretically a grasp of its origins and our place in it. That is if you actually study—many students scrape by without going to lecture at all, miserably cramming the whole solar system in the night before the exam.

For all you Al Gore wannabes, Science A-30, “The Atmosphere” will let you score some actual knowledge about global warming and its even sadder hag of a big sister, the depleting ozone layer. The inconvenient truth about “The Atmosphere,” however, is that though its content may be semi-suitable for the big screen, the lectures are less than scintillating. Once known as “Gutmosphere,” the course’s formerly stratospheric grade inflation has, tragically, returned to earth. To avoid plummeting yourself, weasel your way into TF Winston Tao’s section—he’s known for being friendly and a good explainer.

If you embrace grade deflation, icy cold showers, and iTunes, Science A-49, “The Physics of Music and Sound,” is a good, if tough, Core choice. You’ll learn about how various types of instruments produce different types of sound, what causes dissonance, and, for a final project, you’ll use Amadeus software to figure out how sound moves in an enclosed area. But beware: if you salivate over Satie but shy from sine waves, give this class a wide berth. A grasp of physics, good ’ol trigonometry, and a serious interest is music is mandatory if you want to get something more than a C out of the course. Your fellow classmates will likely be people actually into science, which will make the course better or worse depending on where you fall on the spectrum. Professor Eric Heller and most of his students are quite enthusiastic, but if you aren’t interested in the hows and whys of wind instruments, the coursework will likely bore you.

If you’ve made a commitment to attend class, the antics of Science A-29, “The Nature of Light and Matter” is most likely to entice you to actually show up. Each lecture features a fun demonstration, usually concerning how light reacts under different circumstances. A-35’s science component is essentially “Physics-lite,” though if you haven’t taken physics before you will have significant catch-up work to do. The course goes quite in-depth at seemingly random times, and the weekly problem set will keep you up to speed but could cramp your style.

Science A-50, “Invisible Worlds: Micro- and Nanothings, Science, Technology, and Public Policy,” covers a broad smattering of small things—from microwaves to atomic particles to stem cells. You’ll talk about the Alice-in-Wonderland-esque counter-intuitive nature of these super-small things (groovy!) and get to know the world of nano (hint: it’s not about the iPod). If you prefer the bigger picture, Science A-36, “Observing the Sun and Stars,” has some promise, but be prepared to put in the hours, as two labs a week—limited to 6 students—outside of class are required, and six lab reports make up the bulk of your grade (the lowest two are dropped). Weekly quizzes involve quantitative reasoning, but not being a science buff won’t hurt too much—prior knowledge of physics or astronomy is not required.

Science A isn’t a thrill a minute, but if you make a modest effort you might get something out of it beyond a fulfilled requirement and a decent grade.

At the least, you’ll finally impress that six-year-old cousin of yours.