30 Seconds to Mars

"From Yesterday"

Dir. Bartholomew Cubbins

If music videos teach you one thing and one thing only, let it be this: never follow a man wearing impeccable eyeliner.

30 Seconds to Mars’ “From Yesterday” places thoroughly made-up Jared Leto and his three companions in ancient China, complete with a child emperor and a non-sequitur samurai.

There’s some plot about time travel and lost love and a treasure map, but it’s only a weak set up for some amazingly incongruous scenes: four pale, emo-uniformed men walking in the midst of samurai. Leto wields a katana while wearing black fingerless gloves. Two servants ask the Emperor what he wants most in the world; his answer is 30 Seconds to Mars.

The video is an exhausting 12 minutes long: five of tortured, solemn Leto, and the rest of sword fighting and distant mountains. The fight scenes in “From Yesterday” are well-shot, with frequent slow-motion zooms and lots of jumping. The landscape is well-shown with lush shots and the bright costumes and intricate formations make nice eye candy.

But these are only brief respites from the stiflingly slow pace of the video. The first two minutes are primarily concerned the band walking in slow-motion and Leto sulkily staring into the camera.

What happened to the sexy bad boy of “My So-Called Life”? When did Jared trade in his plaid flannel shirts for goth makeup and a disgruntled pout? These are only a few of the many questions that the video raises, but never answers.

I now know there is something worse than a man with eyeliner. A man with eyeliner, a samurai suit, and an electric guitar.