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Adopting From Abroad is a Blessing

Re: “Adopt a Conscience,” comment, Oct. 31.

I’d like to respond to Kyle A. de Beausset’s article, especially in light of the adoption program I know best, the Chinese-American program, which is the largest international adoption program in operation today.

I do not know anyone, American or Chinese, who has spent time in an orphanage and believes that it is an adequate environment for a baby or young child. The exquisitely fine-tuned neurodevelopment of children is compromised by group care, sub-optimal nutrition, and the inability to explore; every week in an orphanage is something to be avoided. It’s wonderful to have perfect adoptions—in-country, culturally sensitive, supportive of birth parents and birth county—but, truly, the most important thing for a child is a permanent, loving family.

I would like to stress that in terms of policy and aid, the Chinese adoption and orphanage officials are our partners, guiding policy and grant decisions. They are the people who do the real work with the children and understand their needs. Like us, they choose the type of support that will increase a child’s chances of leaving the orphanage and, with American support as well as support from the Chinese government, have been able to make that a reality for thousands of children.

Of course adoption is selfish. Raising any child is such a large emotional and financial commitment that it has to have a strong component of satisfaction. Would you really like to be raised by someone who did it purely for noble motives, not because raising a child is immensely emotionally gratifying and a ton of fun? The point is that adoption, imperfections and all, is a tremendous emotional benefit to children and parents, as well as to the dedicated professionals who make it possible. As for profit-making by those involved—I wish! Then we could have more adoptive families and fewer Enrons.



SHANTI A. FRY ’73

Cambridge, Mass.

Nov. 3, 2006



The writer is president of Families with Children from China-New England, a volunteer parent support group.

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