Scottie Pippen, you ignorant slut.

Pippen, formerly one of the best players in the NBA and the man best known for what Michael Jordan accomplished, reportedly is close to having his way and being traded from Houston to Portland. The Houston Chronicle and Portland Oregonian both reported the deal, with The Chronicle implying that it is just a matter of time.

This comes after Pippen told ESPN that Barkley was "fat" and "selfish." Considering Barkley had a better year than Pippen, what does that make Scottie? How about "lazy" and "a quitter" and "a whiner" and, most of all, "overrated" and "overpaid"?

He's ignorant if he thinks he has a better chance to win a championship in Portland than with the retooled Rockets, which added Steve Francis and Shandon Anderson over the offseason.

He's a slut if he goes around the league, offering his wares because his feelings are hurt.

Pippen has experience with this sort of thing. After all, he sat out most of the Bulls' final championship season with a foot injury, saying he would never play for Chicago again. Of course, Jordan won his sixth ring, with Pippen tagging along after a change of heart, and then rode off into the sunset.

Pippen's career demonstrates that he's a supplemental player, incapable of carrying a team all the way. After Jordan left the first time, Pippen had his best year statistically, but when Phil Jackson called a last-second play in the playoffs for Toni Kukoc--who won the game--Pippen was sulking on the bench. He's brought the same when-the-going-gets-tough-get-going mentality to Houston.

The Rockets expected him to be a difference-maker, and they treated him like the superstar he thinks he is. Pippen felt unappreciated in Chicago, which tends to happen when you're playing next to Jordan. Stacy King somehow managed to deal with it. But respect wasn't the problem in Houston.

His trade was big news, making the cover of Sports Illustrated and ESPN Magazine. He was supposed to elevate the Rockets to contender status. He got the huge contract he felt he deserved and went on to have his worst year since the '80s.

Barkley scored 16 points and grabbed 12 rebounds a game last year. The Rockets became his team after Hakeem Olajuwon continued to struggle after two knee surgeries. Barkley rebuked his teammates and played harder than anyone else, knowing that he is running out of chances to win a championship.

Meanwhile, Pippen scored 14.5 points per game, a drop of 4.6 points from the previous season. He whined the entire year about his role in the offense, even after Coach Rudy Tomjanovich met with him and tried to accommodate him.

Who didn't play like a winner last year when the Rockets lost Game One of their playoff series against the Lakers? Pippen blamed Barkley for fouling Shaquille O'Neal prematurely. It was Pippen who dribbled the ball off his foot with eight seconds left. Earlier in the year, Pippen publicly wondered why the Rockets had traded for him if they were going to misuse him.

Pippen is a cancer, unwilling to consider anyone but himself as he continues on his mission to prove that Jordan didn't make him. Everything he does shows one thing more and more clearly, however: Jordan made him.

Pippen went from a point forward in Chicago, the primary ball-handler, to someone who supposedly wore down in Houston from all the ballhandling. It's amazing what a difference a year makes.

The Rockets traded for point guard Francis, the No. 2 pick in the draft, to ease Scottie's load. If the trade doesn't occur, Anderson, one of the top free agents who could realistically have changed teams, will start at shooting guard and give Pippen some rest also.

Houston did everything in its might to make Pippen comfortable. It showered him with affection, often in the form of limos, and made sure that no one in his extended family ever has to work again.

Then, it made all these changes over the offseason to get the run-and-gun offense Pippen wants. Francis, Anderson, and Pippen would make the Rockets one of the best fastbreaking teams in the league.

But Pippen wants to quit. He now refuses to play on the same team as Barkley, whom he called one of his best friends last season. Barkley even defended Pippen for having such a miserable season earlier this week.

Before the season began last year, Barkley, a free agent, promised Pippen he would re-sign if Scottie were traded to the Rockets. They agreed to come on board together, and now Barkley is making the trip to the doctor's office to have the knife in his back removed.

Et tu, Scot-tay?

The proposed trade isn't a good one for the Rockets. They would trade one star player for six ranging from scrub to solid. So it's obvious they do not want to make this deal.

If Pippen would apologize, shut up and play, the Rockets would forgive him and be one of the top five teams in the NBA.

He may have gone too far, however. He got personal in his attack of a teammate, one who is more important to the team than Pippen. Nevertheless, Houston has to wonder whether getting rid of a surly player is worth strengthening a Western Conference opponent in Portland, which might even ship Pippen to the Lakers.

It makes no sense, but Pippen seems intent on burning the bridge between the Rockets and himself. The best thing that can happen for the team and for him to save his reputation is for the match not to light.