I am amazed at times by my capacity for pettiness. Small problems of the day--response papers, midterms, and a dozen other things--loom disturbingly large in my undergraduate mind plowing through school with too little reflection on the larger matters of life. As I've spent more time with "regular people" not affiliated with Harvard, I've noticed how we undergraduates change the level of our discourse profoundly (and perhaps subconsciously) when speaking to those outside our collegiate circle. We realize the triviality of our usual gripes, and discuss something other than consulting, recruiting and paper deadlines. We move away from excessive preoccupation with short-term goals and address the human concerns that link us to the rest of the world. Though the process of education is designed to deepen our understanding of these concerns, it seems that we allot too much of our conversations to trivial matters and end up the worse for it.

As young people with promise, we are continuously presented with visions of the quick path to success. The next target lies just ahead, and we wrap ourselves up in meeting it.

While ambition can definitely be a good thing, devoting vast amounts of energy to jumping the next hurdle may prove a troublesome life habit. The trouble stems from the fact that these hurdles just don't end, and there is always more to strive for. If we don't know how to balance the drive to reach the next level with the vital habit of leading a considered life, we may go through life without practicing reflection.

Some might think when applying to Harvard that the application process deserves all their energy, and once admitted they can think about the other things in life. Pretty soon the first semester comes around, and it's time to prove oneself by making the extra effort to get ahead. Next comes sophomore year, and now things start to count more. In the recruiting race, a job with the most prestigious firm promises the most valuable experience and most sought-after MBA. Once in a firm, career advancement is the prized apple and extra effort once again is the way to achieve it. And if you do become the CEO, that only means even more pressure to excel.

It may be self-deception to think that meeting the next goal will mean an end to the game of striving for more. The pressures we feel today are here to stay, and it is important that we learn how to handle them while devoting sufficient time to the profound.

Investing too much thought in our own problems is dangerous because it can lead to self-absorption, no matter how well-meaning we may be. One can be self-absorbed without being selfish--while caring about a lot of other things, we may be paying attention only to ourselves. Such self-absorption reduces our ability to connect with others.

It's amazing how often the formulaic "how are things?" is asked without the questioner paying attention to the answer. We may really be concerned for the other, but we are too caught up in our own affairs to actually listen. Taking a step back, it becomes clear that to treat our friends as friends, we need to look beyond ourselves.

When told to keep things "in perspective" and to take our minds off the little hassles that hound us, we often find it easy to dismiss the advice. Some feel that their frenzy allows them to get their work done better and thinking about anything else will mean neglecting important responsibilities.

Having a sense of perspective, however, does not mean that you stop caring about the little things in life or the daily grind ahead. Armed with perspective, one is able to appreciate things for what they are, and undertake the same task with a better mindset. Contemplation does not mean rejection of the practical--rather, reflection complements action and does not categorically hinder it.

Harvard students have high hopes, and these hopes are not unfounded. Our environment is geared towards looking ahead and focusing on the future. In charting out our lives, however, we may concentrate too much on material success and external achievement without reflecting enough on developing as human beings. With all our concern for what we want to become, we must not fail to consider who we are.

Aamir Abdul Rehman '99 is a social studies concentrator in Cabot House. His column appears on alternate Thursdays.