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SORDID TALES OF NINTENDO ADDICTION

Not all sports garner the same sort of respect. In nearly every country, soccer ignites an almost religious fervor and ecstasy, while in America, football, baseball and basketball are currently the sports of choice. But perhaps futbol is already taking hold here, in the form of Nintendo 64's FIFA World Cup Soccer, a two player game whose adherents devote as much time and energy to FIFA as many varsity athletes do to their own sports.

"I lettered in it last year," claims Ryan A. Riess '99, one of 15 devoted FIFA players. The men, all seniors in Pforzheimer House, spend at least two hours every day playing Nintendo 64. Though World Cup Soccer is the game of choice," You have to see Mario Kart to get the real essence of what's going on," claims Jason D. Lalli '99.

In addition to FIFA and Mario Kart, they also play Mortal Kombat and Goldeneye. Lalli criticized the latter game, however, saying," It's not fun, it's just killing people." Burak H. Alsan '99 retorts, "Not like Mortal Kombat?" The verbal contests were nearly as competitive as the action on the screen.

It's FIFA, though, that makes all the difference. The group plays before and after lunch and dinner and every other chance they get. "Lalli, who wears a number 10 jersey, was headed for Phi Beta Kappa until FIFA," Riess claimed.

The obsession began, apparently, with David I. Costanzo '99, who organized a House-wide tournament last year (which is available on videotape). Lalli says, "He got RSI from playing." Costanzo jokes," I need a scribe to play for me."

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If Costanzo did have RSI, it probably wouldn't affect his devotion to FIFA. "It doesn't matter if it's a win if it's not a quality win," Costanzo says while playing. Still, excuses play an important role in conversation during the game. Blaming the game controllers is fairly common, as it blaming the partner or referee. When someone scores, it is met by cheers, groans, high fives, insults and compliments.

"It gets pretty intense, but we never come to blows," says Riess. There was one exception, however, when an unnamed spectator walked in front of the TV one too many times and was punched for it. "It's a big party foul, a huge, HUGE party foul," Riess explains.

Though dedication to the game takes up a lot of their time, the FIFA junkies do find time for other important aspects of life. They take breaks for lunch and dinner, for example. Several are involved in long-term romantic relationships, though one was discovered by his gown-clad girlfriend just five minutes before the Radcliffe Senior Soiree. He was still in his jeans, his gaze locked on the screen during an intense game of Mario Kart. Although he lost that game, their relationship somehow survived. Perhaps women just can't resist them--Anna M. Harr '99 claims that "Nintendo boys are the sexiest boys in the world!"

As Lalli explained, "Nintendo games aren't all we do. We also play computer games." They also play sports. When asked which intramurals they play, the group responded in unison, "ALL of them."

"Even ping pong," adds Lalli. The group cheered at the suggestion of an N64 FIFA intramural. But, according to Reiss, "No one on campus is as good as us. But if they want to, come play us at Moors 404. We'll be here."

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