Advertisement

The Singles

All you need is love? Not at Harvard. Most students say they plan to spend February 14th poring over their books rather than snuggling with their sweethearts.

For most couples, Valentine's Day marks the celebration of love and romance. But at Harvard, it serves as the annual reminder that one is, in all likelihood, still single. While those with a significant other will wine and dine, the single population will pursue slightly different activities.

Many single students say they will merely be studying or completing problem sets. Some students say they plan to attend an MCAT review at the Kennedy School from 6 p.m. to 9 p.m., while another student mentioned a Women in Science meeting to be held at 8 p.m. in Loker Commons.

For those enjoying the single life, preoccupation with academics and extracurriculars is a popular Valentine's Day activity.

When asked how the romantic symbolism of Valentine's Day made them feel, single students offered a variety of responses.

"I'm kind of indifferent," exclaimed Daryn H. David '99. "I don't find it depressing if I'm not with someone."

Advertisement

But not everyone shared David's optimistic mood.

Marcy M. Mousavi '99 said she will "probably watch some sappy movie and cry with the rest of [her] single girlfriends in the entryway."

Harvard does offer these romantics some alternatives in hope of alleviating their gloom. A "No Valentine?--Laugh It Off" event is being held at Loker Commons, for instance.

But many students say they do not believe their singularly platonic existence is a laughing matter.

In fact, they express frustration--not necessarily with Valentine's Day, but with what Andras T. Forgacs '98 describes as an anti-social, "non-peer-centered campus." As a result, Forgacs says, "I think it is difficult to have relationships on this campus."

Most students say they believe Harvard's atmosphere is not conducive to forming romantic relationships. Those interviewed say that very few of their friends are dating anyone at Harvard, but that, as Forgacs says, "a lot of them have significant others elsewhere."

While some students question whether the prevalence of non-dating is a reflection on Harvard, George C. Lee '97 says that "compared to other schools, at Harvard it seems people don't really go out very much."

A majority of those interviewed say they think one's odds of dating are greatly diminished at Harvard.

Some students suggest that women on campus are more likely to mourn the coming of Valentine's Day than men.

One student who wished to remain nameless says she thinks "guys here don't seem to want to commit, [and] most of the girls are depressed about the dating scene."

But others decry this as stereotyping, insisting that the male "wanderer" and the female eager for a ring are images which are no longer accurate. At a school like Harvard, where the genders seem equally driven and academically motivated, students say it is unfair to blame the non-existent dating life on male fears of commitment.

Undergraduates offer non-gender-specific explanations to account for the dissatisfying romantic life cultivated at Harvard.

"Harvard is a very goal-oriented place, seeing people as a means to an end. Relationships are not conducive to this mindframe," Forgacs says.

He contrasts this mood at Harvard with that at Clarkson University, which he attended prior to arriving here. At Clarkson, he says, "the idea of just hanging around was so much more prevalent."

Here at Harvard, Forgacs describes students as typically saying "Well, let's have coffee, but I have to get back to do my problem set."

Students are often on a tight time budget in which socializing is unlikely to be prioritized among the slew of intellectual and extracurricular pursuits, he says.

Another student, who asked not to be identified, agrees "everyone is so into their own work, it's just not happening here."

One student says "the too-busy-for-other-people" syndrome, a popular characterization of the Harvard personality, prevents students from engaging in an active dating life.

Some students laugh at the assertion that "everyone is a dork who studies too much in the library," saying a school comprised of such a population is rather humorously embarrassing. Others, however, acknowledge that they "wish there was more casual dating." When they stop to think about it, they say they feel sad and frustrated with the present system.

Valentine's Day is not widely celebrated at Harvard. Most students will probably do what they always do and are very good at: work. A small minority will sit around and watch sappy movies or drink the beers of consolation. The even smaller minority with a beloved may partake in some romantic rendezvous.

The single majority, whether studying, moping or partying, will inevitably, at some point, pause for reflection. When they do, they might look optimistically towards the future, hoping that maybe by next year they will have found that special somebody at Harvard.

Advertisement