Duke, Duke, Duke; let's play Duke, Duke, Duke...

The Harvard men's basketball team has a little bit of a problem.

I'm not talking about the uniforms or the level of play--I'm talking about the schedule.

Some of the Crimson's non-conference engagements are Lehigh, B.U., and the Chemical Bank Tournament (try lona, UNC-Greensboro, Buffalo). Now, I don't want to seem like a crybaby, but the Patriot League doesn't really tempt my tummy.

Yes, I know that the Crimson 0-4 (including last night's loss to Colgate) against the other non-scholarship conference.

But Harvard's won-lost record is not the biggest issue here. Doing something different is.

...let's play Duke, Duke, Duke...

The Crimson, a few years back, would play those rulers of the ACC. Sure, Harvard always lost by a Lincoln margin (as in, four score and seven), but it was an experience.

Double-digit losses to Duke--or Stanford, or Michigan, or whomever--would give Harvard a tough lesson, but a lesson nevertheless. One certainly can not argue that a game with another small northeastern college certainly gives the Crimson more help down the road.

So how 'bout it? A home-and home series with California-Berkeley. Trontcourt lurkers like Kyle Snowden and Darren Rankin would see how a Top 25 team boxes out. Guards Jared Leake and James White could learn how to trap from the best.

More importantly, though, the team as a whole would see the work ethic of a couple of NBA-bound players. The Grant Hills of the world do not get to the NBA solely on innate ability, and I am sure that the Crimson could glean some habits off of them.

There is, of course, one other major reason that Harvard should schedule national powerhouses. The fans.

Looking at the photos from old Harvard-Duke games of the 80's, I did not see a single empty seat. The stands of Briggs Cage were packed with rooters, all enjoying their chance to see a once-in-a-lifetime experience.

The only time I have seen Briggs filled like that was for last year's Penn-Harvard game, which only proves that talent brings spectators. And the more talent you have, the more satisfied the spectators will be.

True, it seems rather mean to send Harvard to its doom for the delight of the fans. Yes, Crimson players must have felt really awful after being doubled by the Dukies or crushed in Cameron year after year. But once the initial pain diminishes, Harvard can feel proud of the fact that they played Duke. Practically all Harvard players do not make the NBA, but they should be able to buy a Celtics ticket and say, "I guarded him."

Another problem is the fact that it costs money to fly to the Carolinas, but I'm sure that some donor would be willing to contribute. If travel costs are really that big of a problem, I could settle for a series with UMass. Or even B.C. Or, if you want to get really crazy, another basketball Beanpot.

All that is left now is for the hoops elites to agree to play us, but that shouldn't be too much of a problem. Though Harvard does not have a basketball tradition in any sense, its academic tradition is as good as any. Every basketball power schedules more than a few cream puffs, and playing Harvard makes as much sense as playing anyone else.

How about it, then? What if next December, Harvard takes on Duke? At Briggs? Don't even try to tell me that you wouldn't come.

Harvard players should be able to buy a Celtics ticket and say, 'I guarded him.'