"The fans, I love 'em."--Bob Uecker.

Not everyone can be one.

Then again, not everyone wants to be one--which explains why only 30 or so turn out for each game.

But if you've got a warm wardrobe and an adventerous spirit, why not join those who are making women's ice hockey the cult--and the sporting event--of the 1980s.

Why become an icewomen disciple?

You'll be joining a hardy but elite horde at arctic Bright Center for the Crimson's home contests. And, if you choose, you could become one of an even smaller--and more elite--group that joins the Cantabs on the road.

At Bright, you're treated to free coffee. You also get a complimentary program that tells you everything you'll ever want to know about the icewomen--all in a single page.

And while the Zamboni is clearing the ice between periods, you get to huddle with other fanatics in the bathroom in an attempt to keep warm.

Not convinced?

How about an autographed puck from Harvard goalie Jennifer White? A shattered stick from Co-Captain Genie Simmons? A recording of Coach John Dooley's pre-game pep talk to the girls before last Saturday's Vermont game?

The gifts are great, you say, but you want to know more? Who, really, are these thick-skinned souls you'd be joining in the icy seats of Bright?

"We get an awful lot of parents and friends," Harvard Assistant Coach Bill MacDonald says. "They're a hardy bunch. It's cold in the rink without a lot of people."

Sometimes, however, the internal flames of passion compensate for the lack of external warmth.

Take last Saturday, for example.

High above the rink, almost in the shadows, John Amory, Joe Harvey and Elliott Smith--Harvard freshmen--observed the action below.

"I'll tell you why they're here," Elliott said, pointing to his companions. "Because they have girlfriends that play. I'm just along with them."

John and Joe shook their heads emphatically. What Elliott said wasn't true, John said, unless you "use the term girlfriend very loosely."

John said he simply came to support a friend because she went to one of his crew meets.

"There's a definite link between the men's crew team and the women's hockey team," he said.

He pointed to Elliott. "This joker's not just here with us. He's not for number..."

Okay, okay. So over-eager freshman aren't your scene. You could always hang around with the parents:

Unlike John and friends--who left before the third period--Mrs. Joan Upson stayed for the entire game. But she didn't look too pleased about it.

"I'm here because my step-daughter is on the Vermont team," she said. "Her father and I are here together."

Mr. Upson didn't seem to be around, however. Mrs. Upson explained that he was in the men's room--not using the facilities but simply keeping warm.

Too dry for your liking? How about camping out with Penelope Papailius, a Harvard freshman, and friends:

"We always come to these games," she said. "I think we've been to more women's hockey games then they've actually played."

Or Jamie Neilson:

"You can have good hallucinations here," Neilson said.

As for the sport itself?

"It's what all the people in the bars in Boston are talking about."

If that doesn't convince you--nothing will.

But Neilson has another reason for being at Harvard games: his sister is Crimson center--and leading goal-scorer--Johanna Neilson.

What, you ask, would the players think of you if you became an icewomen disciple?

"Our fans? They're awesome," says Johanna Neilson.

If that isn't enough to sell you permanently on the icewomen, here's a final pitch from superfan Leelee Groome, who frequently totes her friend's fox terrier around Bright.

"You really want to know why I come to these games?" Groome says, "Because it's a perfect excuse to walk the dog."

So come on over to Bright Center for the next Crimson contest--Dec. 11 against Cornell.

The dog is optional--but ear muffs are a must.