To the Editors of the Crimson:

Gosh, I really felt good that Saturday morning--woke up at 5 a.m., showered and dressed without any of that "I'm about to die" feeling. I felt so proud of myself. I'd go paint the BSA office and study my Spanish in the morning's serenity.

I was surprised when I stepped out into the fresh air, and saw the dawn drawing its curtains to reveal a beautiful gust of sunshine--sunshine that promised to increase as the day grew older.

So you can imagine how bright my smile was as I walked into the basement of Memorial Hall and passed by all the offices of different organizations. You see, I have had some frightening experiences with some people who were dedicated racists, and so the AAA, BSA, Young Democrats, Young Republicans, International Relations Council, GSA, Christian Fellowship, etc. offices all seemed to say to me, "Yes, we can maintain our individual identities and work side by side, harmoniously, with those of different backgrounds and principles." I painted with a smile on my face.

I finished painting and went to the men's room to clean my brush and bucket, but was not ready for what I found in that room.

"Fuck the Third World Center if it's costing us Americans money!" Response: "Fuck Americans and American corporations if it's costing us Third World people!"

"Toulouse-Lautrec was black." Response: "So are hockey pucks!"

"Any fags found in here will get the fuckin' shit knocked out of them!"

"Kill a queer for Jesus!"

"The famous HR Jewish American Kosher Dining Facility" was written above the toilet.

"No, I'd like to grind THEM into the wall!"

"Kill..." was too much for me. I grabbed my empty bucket and half-rinsed brush and began splattering watered-down white paint onto the walls, but was disappointed because the paint didn't fully cover the writings. I took out my pen and wrote something of my own:

"I know that you're probably thinking, 'Who gives a damn!,' but since everyone else is writing his own opinion, I'll write mine too. I'm Black, but when I look in the mirror or at another human being, I see a clear window pane with two eyes, a nose, a mouth, hair, two ears and two eyebrows. A little of the environment is reflected through that pane, but the only way that I can really identify that pane is by the way that the eyes, nose, mouth and ears act. I feel sorry for those of you who feel the need to post derogatory, racist remarks and for those of you who feel the need to post equally derogatory racist rebuttals. I'll say a prayer, though, and keep trying to paint over those remarks...until they're erased."

Disgusted, I put away my bucket and brush and picked up my Spanish book, I locked the office and started towards the stairs. A little smile came as I passed by the offices again. I thought, "There is hope!"

As I opened the door leading outside, I was shocked at being greeted by a grey sky and a fierce downpour of rain. A couple was passing by, and, remembering that I am to act like a "young man," I zipped my jacket, shoved the book under my arm and my hands into my pockets, tucked my head under and expressionlessly marched off into the seeminly perpetual shower..but oh how I wanted to cry! --L. Gerome Smith '84