Sorry, Beach Boys. Big girls do cry. Just ask Mary Howard, Harvard's emotional field hockey co-captain, who combines artistry with intensity both on and off the field.

The scene is rustic Cortland, N.Y., the team Cornell, the score knotted at one-all, the pressure overbearing in the sudden-death overtime. A Cornell goal means no tomorrow in the single-elimination Eastern tournament, the first step on the ladder to the nationals. It happens. Get out the Crimson hankies.

"I've never cried before over a game, but that one was just too much to handle," said Howard, a Visual and Environmental Studies concentrator from Eliot House. "We worked so hard, and the team really has its act together. It's a damn shame."

A sad ending for a senior perhaps, but when Mary Howard hangs up her spikes for the last time following the Yale game next week, there will be nothing but smiles for the four-year veteran who symbolizes Harvard's field hockey revival.

Frosh Splash

The pride and joy of Stoughton Hall, freshman Mary started in 1975 at right wing for the 2-10-3 unit under rookie coach Debi Field. She had to beat out a senior letterwinner to get the nod, but it was far from wine and roses for the talented towhead.

"It was hard to lose all the time," said Howard, who had earned all-loop honors at wing for Franklin (Mass.) High School. "I was used to winning in high school. I didn't have any friends on the squad here, and was having a tough time with Rad-cliffe in general."

Howard also felt that her rah-rah style of pep and emotion didn't wash with her upperclassmates. "It's an individual psyche here, not a group thing. Everybody had to be laid back and act like they were cool," said Howard, who went on to play varsity basketball that first year before joining the track team as a junior.

Mary did make an impression, however, on the New England coaches who gave her honorable mention status on the N.E. College Team. Although she didn't know it at the time of her initial glory, Mary's offensive days were over. The reason can be reduced to two words: Sarah Mleczko.

"I was shaking in my boots because we had some really good frosh," recalled Mary. "I'm glad that there was enough space for me on the team and that Debi thought enough of me to convert me into a defensive player. I knew Sarah was better than me, but I appreciated Debi's sensitivity in the matter."

Although the switch to defense was difficult to negotiate psychologically, Mary earned second-team All-New England honors her sophomore year as Harvard underwent its amazing metamorphosis. Mary's personal highlight--whaling Yale 2-0, at snowy Soldiers Field.

Before that game Howard took blue acrylic paint and brushed on her team-mates' mouthguards various slogans such as flail Yale, nail Yale, etc. "We all smiled on the opening face-off, and the impact just blew them away," said Mary.

Mary also chuckles when recalling the time she got an eye injury that required four stitches during a game against the U.S. national team. "I was so excited about getting a black eye from a U.S. player that I called home. My Dad (class of '48; Mary's grandfather graduated from the Big 'H' in 1910) thought I was calling about an award or something."

The crazy, energetic, on-the-field-Howard contrasts sharply to the off-the-field edition. Mary switched from pre-med to VES as a result of her experience as head arts instructor at Franklin Country Day Camp. "I want to do community social work, and I think that art is a real development device for people," said Howard, whose Dad's occupation as a congregationalist minister has tremendously influenced her aspirations.

"My life will be governed by my creative abilities and the opportunities that I come across or create, perhaps with underprivileged children."

Community work is nothing new to Howard, who organized hunger walks in high school and directed Harvard's big sister program for needy Cambridge youth.

As for the future, Mary doesn't rule out a return to the med school path, and is optimistic about a shot at the coveted Rhodes Scholarship. But for now, Mary would like nothing better than to wrap up her career with a win against Yale in 'The Game.'

Anybody got some paint?