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The Moon Is Blue

At the Brattle through Saturday

The Loonie Tunes cartoon has just ended ("That's all Folks!"), and the feature film is just starting. You sit back to enjoy what the Brattle management sickeningly describes as "a piece of witty fluff that oozes more charm than harm."

Patty (Maggie MacNamara): "Really, you men! You just don't know how to sew buttons on coats! Vickie's all right and is my roommate, but gosh, honestly, do you plan to seduce me? I mean don't you think a girl should worry about her virtue?"

Don (William Holden): "Ge, kid, I don't want you to worry about losing your virginity. We'll just be affectionate, but not passionate. You're swell (nibbles on her ear)."

Slater (David Niven): "Now hold on a minute, old man. You shouldn't take advantage of this sweet Irish young thing. Her concern with protecting her virginity from your seductive advances is understandable (swallows pitcher of martinis)."

Patty (removing dress, exposing slip and such-like): "Why can't we just be grown-up about the whole thing. Really, the way you men seductively mention virginity to a girl not your mistress, and then wink about what happened when Cynthia slept here last night is silly. We should all be frank about sex."

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